Ask me to stay
by Anniepaulie
Summary: It's my version of 5 th season, most are the same as in the current show..what is different will be shown as the story goes by. PJ
1. Regrets

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.

**Note:** this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4; the differences will come here, in Joey's memories....

**Thanks:** to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more

Joey closed the book. She wasn't on the mood for reading…She just couldn't stop herself of thinking about her life, when everything started going so wrong…Definitely, it was going to get much worse when her grades come, she thought with a heavy sigh....

She knew memories were only in her mind, but they hurt as much as they were happening right now. Coming home after the romantic trip to the Keys…God, how she missed those days…Days full of happiness and magic…That was the trouble, maybe…They had that whole alternative reality, and facing the real world brought back all the pain and angst…but true love was supposed to last forever, wasn't it?

Real world brought back too her need to fix the total alien relationship with Dawson…brought back Pacey's insecurities about her feelings…and now she realizes that he wasn't so wrong…She had lied the first minute her feet touched the shore… "This one is heavy…Hmmm… It's for Bessie…" Maybe that was her first mistake…Among many others…more she thought about it, more Pacey's words when they broke up made sense….he was known as the town's loser, but that time she, Joey Potter, had screwed everything…

A sad smile came to her lips…Pacey, the former town's loser, had fought his own destiny, and against all odds was now at Boston University…He had started studying since he was dating Andie, and she, herself, was a total freak when it came to study ..and they had the rule: no fun before studying…and some of his grades got even better than hers…She almost laughed when she remembered that crazy  Jen's unbirthday party when she got drunk ' cause she was fourth in her class, and was afraid of her future… and Pacey telling her : "you're worried about that? I'm not, 'cause I'm going wherever you go…Pace, you're not worried 'cause you're what, second? No, Jo, actually, I should be really worried 'because I'm fifth…but I'm not, 'cause somehow I know we'll be together…remember Titanic? You jump, I jump…That's what is gonna work for us"

But she needed Dawson in her life too….Pacey tried, but jealousy was a hard enemy to be defeated, specially with all their history…And then there were more lies…about her long phone calls to Dawson, some visits…Pacey didn't say much about it, but he noticed the ladder which was the physical sign that she and Dawson were trying to fix things…but that hurt him, the same way he was trying to get Dawson's friendship again, with no success…

But there were pretty sweet moments, like the senior trip to the ski lodge... the first time they made love...but they were glimpses of what could be...And then it happened: the senior prom...

Everything went wrong since the very start of it....Dawson was sad, feeling lonely, she asked him to dance with her, and like possessed by some sort of evil spirit he decided to kiss her in front of all 2001 class...and that was really the dead end to Pacey and her....She could still hear the hurt words..." You know, Jo, for the first time in my life, I can't be accused as the one who screwed up everything....you did it. The perfect Miss Josephine Lillian Potter screwed up this relationship in every and each possible way...."Pacey, let me explain..." "Explain what? I'm not that stupid as you think I am...You treat me like I'm some sort of mental retarded, but I'm much better than this. And Jo, you never really loved me or all this could never happen..."

She didn't know what to do....Pacey got a summer job with Mr. Kubelik, Worthington's dean, at his boat, what meant all summer far from her...he didn't even talk to her after prom...And the summer of hell consisted in hanging out with Jen and Jack....she couldn't speak to Dawson, not after all that...but Jen and Jack helped her a lot during the summer. they were going to Boston university and were going to share an apartment with Pacey...Dawson went to UCLA, letting her a letter full of apologies, which she couldn't believe....and she got her Ivy League School, Worthington University, living at the dorms, afraid to phone Jack or Jen and Pacey answers it ..And there she was...

"Daydreaming again, bunny?" asked her roommate, Audrey...the blonde, happy, full of energy blonde, as she entered the room... "You know, Joey, I think you should speak to this Pete or whatever his name is..."

"Pacey? No, Audrey...I can't. And besides that he literally avoids me. You know...all the time I went to their apartment, he buries himself in his room or is never there..."

"Jo, bunny. You can't stay like this ...You know what you need? A new boyfriend...parties, go wild a little...Oh, talking about wild...Jen called earlier. She wants you to meet her at that cafe near BU...."

"When, Audrey?"

"What time is it? I think you were supposed to be there in 30 min..."

"Ok, ok...and you tell me now? Well, some coffee with Jen maybe is just what I need right now...you come?"

"Sorry, Jo, but I kind of need to study" 

"Oh, god, Audrey needs to study. must be the end of the days...See ya"

"See ya, Jo...and good luck, you're gonna need it..." whispered a guilty Audrey as Joey closed the door...

Joey easily got there...that little café was her weekly meeting point with Jen and Jack. if anyone told her some years ago that the ones she would always hang out would be them, she would laugh to tears...she couldn't imagine that Pacey or Dawson wouldn't be a part of her life...She looked to all tables trying to find them and suddenly she froze...No, it couldn't be...but those blue eyes, as surprised as hers, looking form her usual table, could belong to just one person in the whole world...the only person who could make her feel alive: Pacey J. Witter.

To be continued...


	2. Meeting Again

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.

**Note:** this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4; the differences will come here, in Joey's memories....

**Thanks:** to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more

Joey's first thought was run away. The second was to kill Jen, Audrey and Jack, who certainly was involved in this trap too...She headed back and was almost reaching the door when she heard his voice... "Jo, wait!" She turned around to find a very surprised and hurt Pacey right near her... "Jo, I don't like the way the guys set this up... but I kind of agree with them that's time for us to talk. We can't keep on this pretending that we don't even know each other ...would you mind?"

"Oh, sure, Pacey...I am the one who is pretending not even knowing you...I'm the one who locks myself in my room whenever I visit Jen and Jackers..." She couldn't help the angry words...

"Jo, stop! Ok. You don't wanna talk, I got the point...You know what? Forget about it!" Pacey had almost forgotten how beautiful she could be...but something surprised him even more... He was surprised by the way she looked...thinner than never, dark circles under her eyes...definitely she wasn't doing fine...She was hurt; actually, both of them were...

Joey decided not let him go this time...He was almost out of the café when she grabbed his arm... "Pacey, I'm sorry....I just got upset with all this..." He turned around...her movement brought painful memories...a long time a go..."

"If you felt even one shred of what I feel for you...then we wouldn't be here having this conversation...Pace...Joey grabbing his hand and her mouth coming down on his..."

They went back to the table...The awkward feeling of not knowing exactly what to do...They sat in silence, just staring each other for some uncomfortable moments...

"So, Pace, what are we gonna talk about? The weather, how was your summer, although we're in fall already or how we broke each others hearts?" Jo asked with sarcasm, tired of all that silence.

Pacey couldn't help a weak smile...the Potter sarcasm. It was a part of her personality, as the air she breathed...

"Jo...I really don't know what to say.... You must be really upset, pissed off with me...and I don't know how to start this conversation..."

"And why should I be upset? For my boyfriend dumping me at our senior prom, and not talking to me for the next 3 months, and then coming to college and avoiding me any possible way?" She knew she didn't have the right to say all that...but she couldn't help throwing all her pain at him...

"Josephine Potter, could you please calm down? Everybody is staring at us..."

"Now you know how I felt at prom!"

"This is useless...Why can't we act like civilized people?"

"Ok, Pacey, I'll try to keep my mouth closed while you say whatever you wanna say"

"Jo, I know the way I broke up with you was the worst way I could have done it...but it was to painful to see you kissing Dawson...after all.."

"I wasn't kissing him...He was kissing me!!!"

"Jo, could you just let me finish this? It was like a bad dream...but that was just a drop in the ocean of mistakes we both made...I pretended that I didn't notice all your lies, and it became a snowball that I couldn't stop anymore...The pain I felt was overwhelming, and by then I knew that you even had lied to Dawson about us having sex, Jo...when you promised me you would tell him the truth...I couldn't bear be near you  or him anymore....you have no idea how  it was to deal with our break up, all by myself and realize that maybe you were out of my league, that maybe you never really had chosen me...That you were with me, 'cause Dawson told you so...But I had to do that, to think far from you, 'cause with you  near me I always get too confused  to think right..."

"Pacey, I was with you for my own decision...couldn't you see that? I just wanted things to be like before, but I really didn't want to loose you..." Tears were running on her face now.

"That's the trouble, Jo...you didn't realize that things are never going to be the same... Dawson loves you...and in your way, you have this confuse feelings over him...and I just don't wanna be a part of this anymore...I thought I could, that my love for you was stronger than anything...but the pain you caused it's even stronger" At this point, he was crying too

"Pacey, I don' t know what to say...but I know one thing: we can't pretend that we never met or something like that...and besides being my boyfriend you were my friend and I miss you in my life... as both. I know I love you, even you don't believe it now, and maybe I will never be able to make up things with you...but I need you back in my  life, at least as my friend..."

"I miss you too, Potter...but let's take it step by step, ok? My wounds are far from healing when it comes to you" 

"Ok, Pace...so, what do we do now?"

"What about eating something? I'm starving after all this emotional release..."

"Why do you always eat on crucial moments in our relationship?" Joey smiled through her tears.

"I don't do that, Joey...I'm just hungry, just that" It was good to see her smile again even if it was a sad one.

"Hey, PJ! I was starting to think that you were going to ditch me..."

Joey turned her head to see who was calling, stunned to see a short green eyed brunette, wrapping her arms around Pacey's neck with intimacy.

"Jo, I want you to meet some one...Joey, this is my girlfriend, Erin Flanagan... Er, this is Josephine Potter, Joey as everybody calls her"

"Nice to meet you, Josie", replied Erin coldly...and then turning to Pacey "I'm going home, Pace. If you need anything, call me ok?"

"You don't have to leave...I was leaving...bye, Pacey, Erin, nice to meet you" Joey almost ran off the café....it was starting to rain, but she thanked God that so no one notice that her face was wet from her tears and not from the raindrops falling from the sky..."


	3. Two jobs at once

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.**

**Note: this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4; the differences will come here, in Joey's memories....**

**Thanks: to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more**

Joey was tired...she was tired of everything...Dawson, Pacey and all the drama that would always be their history...Three days passed after the whole café fiasco, Audrey, Jen and Jack were feeling guilt...and she made good use of it...free coffees and some silence to study could be very useful...but one thing Jen told her, made sense...Pacey was the one who should tell her about Erin. They interfered more than they should...And she made one decision, a really tough one: move on...She knew she would love Pacey for a long time...maybe forever, but things wouldn't work out between them...they still had to many issues to solve...the only thing she could do now was move on with her life, study, get a job, have good and clean college fun. And right now, she was tired of one more thing: the book she was told to read for the next day, and she couldn't go farther than the first pages...And she wouldn't be able to finish, she thought, rolling her eyes as the phone rang...

"Hello! Is this Joey Potter's dorm?" She didn't know what to think when she recognize that voice...his voice

"It's me, Pace...What do you want?"

"Calm down, Jo...I come in peace..."

"Pace, I have a book to read for tomorrow, a Henry James one, it's not easy, and I'm not willing to talk to anyone, especially you...."

"Joey, I phoned 'because I want to help you"

"Witter, if you really want to help me, you could tell me what the hell is this book "The turn of the screw" is about...but as I know you, that would never, be possible"

Pacey started to laugh. That was the Joey Potter he knew and loved and feared most of all things in the world. He was still hurt and Erin helped him to deal with that, but he was not able to have her completely out of his life.

"Potter, you're right, I can't help you with that...but I can make you a better offer....a job"

"A job? Pacey, what kind of job are we talking about? You know I have to st..."

"Joey, in case you have forgotten, I go to college too, remember? But it's a part time job as a waitress in a bar near BU...it's nor that far from your college and it's good money...I've been working there for two weeks and when Danny, the owner, well, he asked me yesterday if I knew someone who could want this job, your name came immediately on my mind... like it hasn't been always there", he added to himself.

"And why didn't you ask that girlfriend of yours?"

"Jo, Erin doesn't need to work...her father is a well-known doctor here in Boston...the only person I know here in this city that needs money as much as I do is you. Can I tell Danny you're up to it?"

So, that Erin girl was rich...she wanted to tell Pacey she didn't want anything from him, but he was right...she needed the money, and besides that, she would be near him...Oh, God, that was definitely insanity...or masochism...

"OK, Pacey...you can tell Danny you have someone to the job...and thanks, Pace"

"Don't mention it, Jo.

...................................................................................................................

The job at the restaurant wasn't different from what she did at the Icehouse or the Yacht Club...the most difficult part of it was dealing almost everyday with Pacey or his annoying girlfriend...definitely, she hated the girl...but she loved the atmosphere at Civilization...They worked as a bar too and form Thursdays to Saturdays, amateur bands went there to play, many college students spent nights there first having dinner, then drinking and enjoying themselves...so, even when she had a night free, there she was, with Jen, her boyfriend Charlie, a guy who studied music at BU and played guitar in a band, Jack and Audrey...and annoying Erin, of course, she couldn't stay away form her knight in shinning armor...

She laughed at her thoughts...she was acting like some old senile lady...she was at Jen's apartment, singing something as she waited for the microwave popcorn to be ready....they were watching some videos tonight, instead of going to Civilization...that made her remember Dawson...she had started to answer his emails two weeks ago...Oh, God...the guy was the most oblivious and stubborn person she ever met....two weeks after months and he was again professing his undying love for her, the soul mates crap and the eternal Dawson's rumbling... but he had always been a part of her life, and she really missed the guy, despite all that...

Jen was setting the video when she heard Joey singing...a smile came across her face...she had been in a good mood since she started working at Civilization...maybe was just the job, maybe proximity to Pacey, maybe she was finally moving on, but she was happy to see her this way...

"Audrey, Jack, the video is almost ready...Jo, where's the popcorn?

"It's here, Jen. The others?"

"Right here, warming the couch" Jack and Audrey answered.

The movie was almost finishing when they heard the doorbell ring...showing a very angry Charlie when the door was opened...

"What happened, sweetie?"

"I can't believe it, Jen...she left us..."

"Who left you, Charlie?"

"Becky... she just left the band, and in two weeks we have that show at Civilization"

"So, what are you going to do?"

"Well, try to find another singer...and by the way, who is singing this way?"

Joey went back to the kitchen to have more popcorn and while she waited to the microwave to work its magic, she was singing again...funny how singing helped her to forget her troubles...but she stopped when a dazzled Charlie entered the kitchen...

"Joey Potter....you're the answer to all my problems..."

"ME, Charlie? If I remember, Jennifer Lindley is your girlfriend..."

"It's not that, Joey...See, may lead singer, Becky just left the band today and we really, really need someone to her place..."

"Charlie, I don't know if I can..."

"Please, Joey..."Charlie asked again showing her his best puppy eyes...

"You wanna know what? Ok, I'll try this...."

They shaken hands to settle the deal and Joey couldn't help laughing...She needed a shrink, 'cause this could only mean one thing: she was insane...She would be singing on a stage in two weeks...Josephine Potter was now a singer....


	4. Jealousy Games

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.**

**Note: this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4; the differences will come here, in Joey's memories....**

**Thanks: to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more**

Pacey couldn't believe in his eyes...Joey Potter was late again, and arriving with that guy...what was his name? Eric, Eddie, no, Rick...She seemed really  happy lately, like he hadn't seen for a while, always singing and laughing...and with that guy always with her...What the hell was happening?

Joey found herself near exhaustion. School work and the rehearsals...she thought it would be much easier, but it wasn't only the singing part, she had to know where and how to stand there and sing. But she was loving every moment...She tried to remember the lyrics of the last song while closing her stuff on her locker at the restaurant when Pacey stopped her.

"Hey, Jo. Late again, huh?"

"I think I'm delusional, Pacey Witter is talking to me!"

"What do you mean, Joey? I talk to you almost every day!"

"Sure you talk to me...all those polite grunts that sound as _good night and _hey_ must be the usual pattern of conversation these days"_

"Well, if you haven't noticed yet, we work here, Potter...This is not the place to social gathering"

"Well, Witter, you don't talk to me even when I go to your place to hang out with Jen and Jack...so why now?"

"I think that our boss won't be any happy if he finds out that you're late almost everyday now 'cause you're fooling around with some guy before work"

"What? So that's it. I knew it"

"What did you know?"

"You're talking to me 'because you saw me with Rick" How dare he? He had a girlfriend and she accepted Rick's rides to work and he got all that upset about it?

"Potter, you really are delusional...Why should..."

"Because you are jealous, Pacey" She interrupted before he could form the whole sentence.

"Me? Jealous? In your dreams, Potter...I don't know even why I'm fighting with you, or should I say, you are fighting with me...I'm just worried about you, Joey, you've been late this past week almost everyday and this guy does not seem a reliable person"

"Worried? Now you're worried about me? You left me last summer without a word, ignored me until I came to work here, and only God knows why you offered me this job and now you're worried? That's really funny!" 

"I didn't leave you without a word. Aren't you forgetting that letter that you never had the decency to give me a proper answer?"

These words stunned Joey. What the hell was he talking about? What letter was that? Pacey noticed the confusion in her eyes, like she really didn't know what he was talking about... 

"Pace, what letter?" her voice almost a whisper, confused tones in it

"Joey, I left a letter in your living room before graduation, over the telephone table"

"Pacey, I never got this letter..."

"Joey, you're lying, as you lied about other many things"

"Pacey, I really don't know what you're talking about..."

"Oh, poor innocent Ice Queen" Pacey replied with irony

"Don't you dare talk to me like that, Jailbait", the old nickname coming through her lips in a threatening tone

"Witter, Potter, don't you guys think that's time to work?"

Both of them turned to see their boss not at all pleased to see his employees discussing their personal affairs there.

Ok, boss" they said together, but as Danny left, Joey whispered "We're not over this conversation, Witter"

......................................................................................................................................

Friday night, the restaurant was crowded. Joey rolled her eyes when she noticed Pacey's girlfriend in a table with Jen, Jack and Audrey. All she needed for a perfect night...She almost dropped her tray when she saw Pacey leaning down and kissing Erin right in front of her for a long, long time. She noticed the looks of concern in her friends' eyes and felt even worse, being object of pity...

Pacey recognized the pain followed by pure fury in her eyes. Right now he wanted to hurt her, to infuriate her and he knew he was doing it fine by the furious way she was looking at him. She was getting the orders from table number four as he passed through her, whispering "so, who is jealous now?"

Joey took a deep breath; ignoring the looks Jen and Audrey were giving...She went to the kitchen to take her orders, just to meet Pacey...

"Anything wrong, Joey?" he asked with a grin

"You think that this is pure fun, don't you? Two can play this little dirty game of yours"

"I don't have any idea you're talking about, Jo"

"Pace, you're wrecking my head! But here is not the place or time to discuss events past"

The tension between them increased until the end of their shift, almost touchable, whenever they passed through each other the air gone heavier. Pacey was getting into his car when he noticed Joey standing right in front of it.

"I said we were not finished, Witter"

"Potter, I'm really tired, can't we leave this for tomorrow?"

"Pacey, I said two can play that little dirt game, didn't I?"

"Well, Jo, your boyfriend isn't here t..." He was interrupted by a very determined Joey jumping in his neck and kissing him. 

She didn't know what made her kiss him...but feel his mouth on hers, first surprised, then kissing her back like there would never be tomorrow, his hands on her hair...That gave her the only certain she wanted to have: he missed her the same way she missed him.

The same impetuous ways she started the kiss she stopped, Pacey completely  stunned, she could even say dazzled by her impromptu act...she could never tell how long they just stared at each other, trying to find out what was going on in their minds and hearts.

"Well, Pacey, I think now it's your move again...Try to sleep after this and if you sleep, sweet dreams..." Joey whispered, leaving an even more confused Pacey alone.


	5. Trouble Night

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.

**Note:** this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4; the differences will come here, in Joey's memories....

**Thanks:** to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more

Pacey arrived home still shocked...what the hell Joey was thinking with all that talk, and that kiss? He sighed heavily...not that he was complaining...he knew that even in thousand years, no other kiss would be so perfect for him than hers. But that whole situation was wrong...He entered his room wanting just a calm night, but was surprised to find Erin there, on his bed.

"What the hell were you thinking?"

"What, Erin? I'm tired, have lots to study tomorrow, I'm not in the mood to have a fight right now."

"You should have thought about this when you kissed me like that...I know that kiss was meant for Joey to see, in some kind of sick fight you guys were!"

"Erin... I."

"Pacey, don't, OK? I know you still love her, I know I'm just  a friend, but I can't do this anymore..."cause in the end, I'm going to get hurt...You are a really nice guy and a I might fall in love with you, and I deserve more than that"

"Erin, I'm sorry...I didn't mean to hurt you...but."

"No buts, Pacey...I'm ending this now, before I get hurt...it was fun, but love was not in this relationship, for both of us...you are my rebound guy and I'm yours...but I want more than that..."

"Erin, I'm really sorry...I wish I could..."

"But you can't...your heart belongs to that girl no matter you say..." She picked her purse, took her keys, about to leave... "But we're still friends...just give me some time, OK?"

He watched her leave, before closing the door, she tuned to him again, and he could see the tears shining...

"PJ, talk to her...you have to listen to her, tell her how you feel...or you won't be able to have another relationship in your life..."

That was really great...not only Joey had gotten to his nerves but now his girlfriend broke up with him...That was perfect...what now?

.................................................................................................................................................................

Joey woke up feeling the phone was ringing inside her head...Who would be insane of calling at that time? 3 am ...She tried to ignore it...Audrey was sleeping; she usually didn't wake up even if the entire army was there...but her sense of responsibility kicked in.... Could something at home, with Bessie or even Alex...

"What happened, Jo? Spill it..."

"Jen?! Do you have any idea what time it is? Couldn't you just wait for a reasonable hour like 9 am?"

"No, when Pacey has almost gotten us expelled from our apartment after listening to classical rock songs as loud as he could, so that is all Boston could hear it too...and I have this weird feeling that you got something with this..."

She couldn't help laughing...he was so Pacey...She told Jen everything about the fight and the kiss...and was shocked to hear Jen laughing on the other side

"What is so funny, Lindley?"

"Well, it took you guys longer than I thought.... You are so obvious..."

"What? Jen, the guy doesn't talk to me more than goodnight for months...and you think it's obvious?"

"Jo, you and Pacey are this way...you cannot say close without fighting...and all this fighting lead to other things...."

"Jen, I just wish I could talk to him...I know he doesn't want me back...he has perfect Erin now...but I wish I could at least talk to him, tell him about school, about the band..."

"And lots of things you should tell him, Joey"

"I don't know if I can...I know he will feel guilty about all that..."

"Jo, you dealt with this on you own for so long, he should know..."

"I'll think about it..."

"Wait, he doesn't know about the band yet? But you guys are going to play tonight, at BU's party."

"I know...I think Mr. Witter will be a little surprise tonight, won't he?"

"Potter, you are the devil.... What are you trying to prove?"

"Nothing, Jen...if the only way he talks to me is to fight, _I have to pick up as many fights that I can..."_

"Insanity is your name...by the way, both of you...you love each other, you should be all lovey-dovey...but no, you have this wicked mating ritual of non sense fights..."

"Right, Jen, call it the way you want. Can I go back to sleep? And don't forget...we're shopping some rock star clothes today..."

"Audrey's idea, right?"

"Right...you know I hate shopping..."

"Ok, good dreams, you evil girl..."


	6. Good advices

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.

**Note:** this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4; the differences will come here, in Joey's memories....

**Thanks:** to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more

Jack looked concerned to his friend...something had him totally and completely upset...He knew Jen had phoned Joey during the night, after the whole musical incident, but she was still sleeping, and he didn't want to wake her.. Pacey looked terrible, sat on the couch, looking to nowhere, like he hadn't slept all night long...Jack knew that it had something with Joey, he saw the heated looks they were giving each other yesterday...and Erin, he heard her leaving not too much time after Pacey got back from work...

"Hey, man, what's up?"

"Morning, Jackers, sorry about last night..."

"Witter, what is going on? I haven't seen you like this since the day you met Jo at that café" Jack sat beside Pacey.

"My life is such a mess, Jack...You know. I tried to put things in place again, to get over all the drama I went through this year, but it seems to haunt me.."

"Pacey, you had not tried...you're a smart guy and know that as well as I do...You are postponing it, and the same works with our lovely Ms. Potter...And don't say you are in love with Erin, 'cause I know that's bullshit. You guys work together, because you asked Danny to give her the job, just to be near her, but you guys were ignoring each other until last night, and most because Joey doesn't even hear you talk about your little girlfriend and you are scared to death to talk to her...and it seemed to work, but everyone here knows that you guys can't help that any longer."

"Is it that obvious? And by the way, ex- girlfriend since last night too...Erin thinks she deserves someone better than me..."

"She wants a guy who loves her, Pace, not to be some kind of replacement girl..."

'But what am I supposed to do? I can't get through all that again, Jack...I can't feel like I'm not good enough for her, to feel that first thing that happens she'll be running after Dawson all again..."

"So you were hiding behind a girl. Shame on you, Witter...and I'm the gay guy here..."

"This is not funny, Mc Phee...You know that can happen."

"Pace, I don' know why you are so worried about Dawson...he's in California..."

"He's always been the issue..."

"No, Pace, you and Joey made him the issue...Pacey, You guys should at least talk, not to be together again, but at least figure out what went wrong...you don't have any idea what Joey went through after you left, do you?"

"What do you mean? What happened?" He got worried...he remembered how she looked when he first saw her after the summer...

"See my point? You guys have to talk...And Pacey, if it makes you happy, she didn't even say good bye when he left, and as far as I know, she talked to him just last month, after thousands of e-mails and Jen begging her to."

"If I'm going to face her, I should take a shower, shave, you know, to have some strength..."

"You just wanna look handsome for her..."

"Mc Phee, if you keep this way, I swear, one day you'll be found dead...And, thanks, Jack..."

"You're welcome...and by the way...never play Springsteen again at 2 am, ok?"

Pacey threw a pillow over Jack and headed to the bathroom...what would happen now?"


	7. Confrontations: part 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything here, and this is just for fun.

**Note:** this is an alternative season 5...It's pretty much the same about season 4, the differences you will see…

**Thanks:** to Lali, who always reads them and asks for more, Lisa, Trice and all people from TLAP and everybody who cared to review, Thank you guys!!!!

Joey and Audrey stopped right in front of Jen's place. It was almost noon; Audrey would never leave her bed so early on a Saturday. Joey knew Pacey wouldn't be working, but she wanted to avoid him, she wasn't ready for any kind of confrontation.

"What's wrong, Bunny? Are we staying all day here, in front of Jen's door?"

"I don't wanna see him, Aud."

"Are you afraid of what? Big bad Pacey? He's not that bad, actually, if he wasn't your beloved ex-boyfriend, I would make a move…"

"Audrey!!!" Joey rolled her eyes.

"He's hot; Joey and I have eyes…" Before she could finish, Pacey opened the door. He looked at them, with a feeling that they were talking about him.

"Hey, Witter, anything fine? Are Jen and Jack ready?" the blonde entered the apartment, without asking permission, talking with no stop, leaving Pacey and Joey staring at each other.

"Is she always like that?"

"No, Pace, she is calm today." They were still at the door. "Hmm, Pace?"

"What?"

"Are we staying here at your door all day?"

"I thought it would be fun, but if you wanna come in…" He laughed when he saw her rolling her eyes.

Audrey had disappeared, probably in Jen's room. 

"Are you guys going out?"

"Yes, Audrey and Jen want to do some shopping…" She couldn't believe him…they were talking like nothing had happened last night, but she was relieved, she didn't want to bring past ghosts back, not today. 

Somehow he knew she was going to avoid the subject, that she didn't want to talk about last night, or their past relationship.

"Potter, I…I want to talk to you." He couldn't hold it anymore.

"About what?"

"Jo, you know exactly what I'm talking about"

"Pace, please, not today…" 

"Jo, we can't avoid this anymore, especially after last night."

"And you decided you want to do this right now?"

"Jo, we are going to avoid this talk again and again, you know that…I don't wanna be near you without being able to talk to you anymore, if we wanna be friends, we must clear out things between us…"

"Ok. But I don't wanna talk here, in your living room, where anyone can interrupt us."

"Let's go to my bedroom."

In Jen's room, Audrey, Jen and Jack were listening behind the door.

"Damn it, I can't believe they're going to talk in Pacey's room…"

"Would it be too rude if we stand behind his door, Jack?"

"No, Jen , not at all…besides,  after all the whining and moping we have been through these past months, we deserve to know what they are going to talk about."

"You guys think they're going to get back together?"

"If they're honest enough, they will…"

"Thanks God…Joey really needs to get laid…"

The three of them couldn't stop laughing at Audrey's comment.

Inside Pacey's room, Joey sat on the bed, while Pacey stood right in front of her.

"Now what? Is this some kind of judgment? You are going to stand in front of me and accuse me of God knows what?" Joey was getting angry; he was just staring at her.

"Why?"

"Why what, Pacey?"

"Why did you kiss me?"

"I don't know…it was something I wanted to do for a long, long time…but you know what, I'm leaving, this is not gonna work"

"C'mon, Potter, you're running away…"

"No, Pace, that's your specialty…I didn't come here to talk about last night's kiss. This is the last thing we should talk about"

"What do you want to talk about?"

"Why did you leave me without a word, for starts, without even caring to listen to me?"

"I didn't care? You didn't care, Jo, I left a letter on your porch door, asking you to meet me before graduation at the ruins and you never showed up…"

"And here you go again with this letter thing…Pacey, I never saw this letter, and you really think I wouldn't meet you if what you're saying it's true?"

"Well, you should believe, after all, I'm not the one who uses to lie about everything…"

The tension and the pain kept all those months were almost palpable between them…Despite the angry words, full of anger, their eyes showed something more, a flame, and a kind of hunger that nothing could extinguish.

"How many times do you need me to admit that I was wrong, Pacey? What more do I need to say? I'm sorry, I know, I, Joey Potter was stupid enough to believe that I could make things the way they were before us, I know I should never have lied to you, but I can't turn back time…Yes, I lied, but at least I was honest in my feelings…"

"And I wasn't honest? Joey, I loved you…"

"That's a little hard to believe, Pace…or maybe your love wasn't strong enough…"

"How can you say that?"

"How? Pace, you left me and the first thing you do when you come back is introduce me to your brand new girlfriend…do you have any idea how I felt?"

"Maybe the same I felt when I saw you kissing Dawson…"

"I was not kissing Dawson…I don't know why I even try…you can't discuss anything between us without bringing Dawson's name in it, can you?"

"Because he is right there, in the back of your mind…'

"No, Pace he's in the back of your mind, you are the one who always made him an issue…I know I contributed to this, but he's your issue…"

"Mine? You know, you're right…this is useless..."

"Pacey tell me one thing, did you ever really believe in us?"

"What?"

"Stop these monosyllabic all grunts. You know what I mean…you never really believed in us, in our relationship…day after day, you were waiting that I would realize the big mistake I had done and would go back to Dawson…"

"And that's exactly what you did…"!

"I didn't…god, Pacey…why do you keep saying this?"

"Everything you did before prom, and that kiss showed me how wrong I was in believing that you would ever love me…"

"What are you talking about?"

"You were distant, acting weirdly, like you were hiding something…then in the car you said you wanted to talk after prom...do I need to be clearer?"

"Ok, I was distant, I was preoccupied and I wanted to talk to you but it had nothing with Dawson…I loved you then Pace, I still love you, if you want to know" She was crying now.

"So, what did you want to tell me then?" His eyes trying to figure out her expression of pain.

"It doesn't matter anymore…I'm tired of this, I'm leaving…"

"Jo, please, I have to know this…I have to believe that this entire year wasn't a lie. For once, make me believe you"

"I can't, Pace…I thought I could, but I can't open this wound again…"

"Jo, tell me. It can be that bad"

"I was pregnant."


	8. Confrontations: part 2

**Disclaimer: I still don't own them, is that clear?**

**Thanks: to everybody who is reviewing…hope you're really enjoying this…**

**Note: it's kind of short…lack of inspiration, I guess…**

"You were what?" Pacey was pale, almost feeling sick.

"You heard me, Pace…I was pregnant." The tears were running freely on her face now.

"What happened? What did you do?" He couldn't help the anger tone in his voice.

"What are you thinking? You are not thinking that I could…" She yelled.

"You're obviously not pregnant right now…" he cut her.

"You really don't know me if that's what you're thinking…I can't believe you can act like such a jerk sometimes…"

"Jerk? Jo, why you didn't tell me you were pregnant?"

"What did you want me to do? Say it in front of everybody while you were breaking up with me at prom? You would probably ask me if it was yours..."

"Was it?' He replied ironically.

Next thing he noticed was Joey's hand slapping his face. She had anger in her eyes, tears, pain, a kind of pain he never saw there, maybe just when her mom died. 

"I shouldn't have said that, sorry , Jo...I didn't mean to"

"Yes, you did…I'm going out…" She grabbed the door's knob, trying to unlock it, but he grabbed her arm, pulling her hear him.

"You can't leave me this way, Potter…I deserve to know what happened"

"Pacey, let me go…"She struggled to break free, but he tightened his grip.

"You're not going anywhere, Potter. Not until we finish this…"

"Pacey , let me go…" She begged, making him hold her even closer, she was trying to get free, both breathless, so they didn't know who made the first move to a kiss, full of anger, but also pain, hunger, love, all mixed up…it was kind everything that really mattered was in that kiss. With feverish movements they started to take off each others clothes, falling into Pacey's bed with no words….


	9. The truth: part 1

**Disclaimer: you already know this: Just wish I owned them, not all of them..I would be happy with Josh.**

**Thanks ** to my reviewers: Lali, Lisa, Jo, Giuliana, John and everybody else who like this as much as I do.

**Note: flashbacks in italics**

They fell on the bed with shirts taken off, Joey's bra left over some of his books, without breaking the kiss. His hands ran over her body, but when they reached her jeans button reality kicked in.

"Pace, I, we can't..."She whispered.

He looked at her confused, finally getting into the situation.

"What was that?" he asked, without moving.

"Our hormones being wiser than us" she couldn't help a smile.

"It's better for you to get…uh…dressed…" he rolled over, allowing her to stand up, reaching for her clothes.

"Think about Grandma Witter" he mumbled to himself, trying to fight the overwhelming need to touch her.

She looked at him amused…she knew he was using the trick of thinking about his grandma to calm down…she remembered how funny she found it when he told that to her a long time ago, aboard True Love. And the way he had his eyes closed, taking deep breaths, it was so the same she couldn't help laughing.

"What's so funny, Potter?"

"You, me, us…how we can change from accusations and heartbreak to almost having sex, and you thinking about your grandma."

"And how is that funny?"

"I don't know, just it is…Pace, I'm going to tell you what happened…but can I ask you one thing?"

"Sure, Jo…" The heated kisses seemed to chase away all the angry between them.

"Can you hold me?"

His answer was moving a little aside so she could lay beside him. She felt his arms around her, both feeling they were home again.

"I missed this, Pace…more than anything else." She whispered.

"I missed you too, Jo." She felt his hands on her hair. "I'm sorry for the things I said to you today."

She didn't reply to that…Pacey got a little bit scared by the blank expression on her face…when she started to talk again, it was like she had been replaced by some other person, with no life in her voice…

"It happened after graduation…"

**Flashback**

_Joey sat on __Dawson__'s dock crying. Dawson's parents were giving him a party and all the gang was there, except Pacey. She needed so much to talk to him; she still couldn't believe he left without attending his own graduation. She heard someone's step and wiped off her tears, trying to hide them._

_"Hey, Joey…" Jen sat beside her. "Wanna talk?"_

_"I couldn't even talk to him, Jen…" She was sobbing now._

_"Shh, Joey, it's ok…it's not like you are never talking to him ever...he'll be living in __Boston__, with me and Jackers when he gets back"_

_"Jen, you don't get it…I can't wait that much…_

_'God, Joey, don't tell me you're…"_

_"I'm pregnant, Jen…" she cried harder._

_"Oh, Joey...what are you going to do?"_

_"I don't know…promise you won't tell anybody"_

_"Have you gone to the doctor yet?"_

_"No, I'm scared…"_

_"Joey, you have to go to the doctor…I'll go with you"_

_"Thanks, Jen" she left out a small laughter "Who would think you would be the one helping me through this…"_

_"Yes, who would guess? Now, wipe off these tears and try to enjoy your graduation party just a little, ok?"_

**_A week later_**

_Joey was alone at home, feeling cramps like she never did before…she was scared to death to call anyone, nobody except Jen knew she was pregnant…Was she loosing her baby, the last thing that somehow connected her to Pacey? She decided to call Jen; she would be there as soon as possible. Someone rang at the door._

_"__Dawson__! What are you doing here?"_

_"I came to see you, Joey..."_

_"__Dawson__, please not now…isn't enough you kissing me in font of everybody leading Pacey to break up with me?"_

_"Joey. He will never, never love you the way…"_

_"Don't even get started…He loves me"_

_"He just wanted you to have sex, Joey, face it..."_

_"No, Dawson. Sometimes I can't recognize you…"_

_"Face the truth, Joey…"_

_"No, __Dawson__, you're dead wrong about this…" The pain in her belly made her fall."_

_"Joey? Jo, what's happening?" Dawson leaned down, trying to help her._

_"My baby" she whispered._

_Dawson__ stood up angry_

_"How could you be so stupid, Joey? Get pregnant? You really deserve him, you're both losers..."_

_He left her alone, missing for seconds a very worried Jen, who found Joey on the floor passed out._

_"Joey! Joey, wake up, please!" She noticed how pale she was._

_Jen quickly dialed 911, hoping help would get there soon. The paramedics were there with the ambulance, asking too many questions_

_"What happened, miss?"_

_"My friend called me, she was feeling cramps, she is pregnant and has not gone to the doctor yet, and when I arrived she was here, passed out"_

_"Can you call her parents or some relative?"_

_"Can I do that at the hospital?"_

_"Sure, come with us…"_

_As soon as they got there, she called Bessie, while the doctors took care of Joey._

_Doctors and paramedics talking_

_"Josephine Potter, seventeen year old, female, her friend says she's pregnant, found unconscious on her floor, vitals: BP 90 over 40, , pulse 120, spontaneous breathing, 1000 ml saline on IV, no response on vitals."_

_"Thanks, we take care from here."_

_"CBC, alcohol and drugs tests, bring an ultrasound scan over here Another IV line, please and 4 units of O neg. And page __OB__"_

_"It's a ruptured ectopic pregnancy; let's take her to the OR, now."_

**_Outside ER._****__**

_"Jen, darling, what happened? Where is my sister?" An almost hysterical Bessie arrived._

_"She's inside that room. I don't know what's happening. Bessie, she's pregnant, I found her unconscious in your living room, and called 911."_

_"Oh, god, she's pregnant?! I'm gonna kill that Witter boy when I get my hands near him…"_

_"Pacey doesn't know Bessie…"_

_"Who is related to Ms. Josephine Potter?"_

_"I'm her sister"_

_"Your sister has a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, which made her bleed a lot, and we're taking her to the OR."_

_"Is it serious, doc?'_

_"She in shock, lost too much blood, but she's young and healthy. We'll keep you updated as soon as possible."_


	10. The truth: part 2

**Disclaimer:** I wanted to own them , but I don't.

**Note:** I finally updated, it was difficult to write this one, so many doubts on what to do…

**Thanks:** for all those who reviewed and had the patience to wait.

**_A few hours later_**

_"Ms. Potter?"_

_Bessie and Jen stood up, facing the doctor who called Bessie._

_"How is my sister?" she asked worriedly._

_"She is fine now, we have her in recovery. But we had to remove one of her tubes…"_

_"Is that serious?"_

_"She may have some problems in the future to get pregnant again and has a chance to have another ectopic pregnancy."_

_"Does she know that?"_

_"She's still under the effects of anesthesia, she wouldn't assimilate this clearly now."_

_"Can we see her?" Jen was too afraid of how Joey would take this._

_"As soon as we take her to her room."___

_It was a long wait. When they were allowed to see her, it shocked them. She looked so pale, lifeless against the white blankets. She opened her eyes slowly, trying to adjust them to the light._

_"Bessie?__ What happened?"_

_Bessie told her what happened. Joey couldn't stop crying, repeating the words "my baby", until she fell asleep exhausted._

"For a while I was sad, then I was angry and then mad at everybody, at Dawson, you, but most of all was mad at myself, my head was full of 'what ifs'…I got better when the doctors considered sending me to therapy, I realized I had to do something before that happens."

"God, Joey, I would never guess that…I shouldn't let you..."

"You shouldn't what, Pacey? Nothing you could do would save the baby or me of going through this… Would it be easier if you were there with me? That's for sure.  But the end, that would be the same." She was at on the bed now, her own arms around her.

"I can't help feeling guilty, Jo." His voice was sad.

"This is one of the reasons I didn't want to tell you…I knew you should feel this way. And one person in pain here is enough."

"I guess Pacey the screw up strikes again." He sighed, sitting beside her.

"Pacey, stop it now! It was not your fault, not my fault; this is one of those things that just happen. It hurts, but there's nothing else we can do unless accept it. Because nothing ever turns back to the way it was before. Whether we like it or not."

"You changed." He whispered, looking into her eyes.

"I had to, Pace. Kicking and screaming but I had to."

"We really messed things up, huh?"

'Yes, we did." She smiled, not a happy smile.

"Do you think we can fix this, Jo?"

"I don't know, Pace. There are so many things against us, pain, hurt, miscommunication…There's love, sure, but I don't know if that's enough. It wasn't the first time."

"You should put how much we're both scared of getting hurt on that list too."

"Pacey, I think we should try to start things from the very beginning."

"What do you mean?"

"We could work on our friendship again. Until you can trust me and then we'll take it from there. I know I can't ask you more than that."

"Jo, it would work if we hadn't a small problem…"

"What problem, Pace?"

"The sexual tension between us and the feelings we both still have for each other."

"First, that makes two, not one small problem. Second we ignored those for the better part of our lives; I think we can manage that."

"So, all we have to do is ignore how we feel? That doesn't make sense if we're trying to make things right."

"Pacey, if we get back together someday, the bad things in our relationship can't come back to haunt us. I know in some point of the road we will want to act on our feelings, but if we do that we might ruin it all. For the first time in my life I want less drama, less angst and more fun and, you can't give me that right now. If we get back together I want it to be for good and with no lies or hiding. I want it to be in a way my prior mistakes won't be held against me and I won't hold anything against you."

"Wow, did you write this down somewhere?" He mocked, but his eyes were telling something different.

"Pacey!!! So, do you agree?"

"Yeah, I think I can live with you as my friend, Potter." He grinned.

"Why do I have this feeling that I might regret this?"

"Well, you remember where this friendship thing brought us the first time, don't you?"

They both laughed.

"Pace, I have to go now…The girls are waiting for me to go shopping."

"This sentence is wrong: Joey and shopping are on it."

"I do some shopping sometimes. See you at the party tonight?"

"Yep, I'll be there."

"So see ya tonight, Pace."

She left but when she reached the door, she turned around, giving him one of those crooked smiles that some day would kill him, making him wonder for how long they would keep this as pure friendship. And then he realized something: he didn't tell Joey that he had broken up with Erin.

Joey left Pacey's room, called her friends and they left for the mall. Only when she was looking for the perfect outfit for the party she realized something: she didn't tell Pacey she was going to sing tonight. She laughed to herself; he would get a little bit surprised by the new and improved Joey Potter. 


	11. ET is back

**Disclaimer: don't own anything.**

**Thanks to Lali and all those who waited so long…**

Dawson climbed off the taxi that brought him to Worthington. He asked a guy about what direction he should take to the dorms. He didn't know exactly what he was going to say to Joey, but he missed her so much, she barely replied his e-mails, he felt he had to see her. It was a Saturday night, he was sure they could have a movie night like old days and talk about their lives and maybe she would see how much he loved her. He stopped at the corridor which led to her door, trying to figure if he should knock, when he noticed a gorgeous blonde opening the door, her hands full of shopping bags.

"Could you help me, please?" She asked him. He nodded and she hands him some of her bags, finally opening the door.

"Thanks…I don't know your name." she winks at him.

"Leery, Dawson Leery. I'm looking for Joey Potter, do you know her?"

"You can bet I know her. She's my roommate. I'm Audrey Liddell. You're the California friend, aren't you?"

He smiled, happy, so Joey talked about him, maybe she was missing him as much as he did.

"Yes, I'm in film school in LA. Where is she?"

"Bunny? She's at Jen's; we're going to a Halloween party tonight." Audrey told him while she fumbled in her bags searching for something.

"I hoped to talk to her today" He frowned a little when he thought about Joey going to a party, she usually would prefer staying at home studying or watching a movie. 

"Well, if you wait, I'm going too, I just have to shower and put on my costume and then I'll take you there. Sit on Bunny's bed and wait for me." 

He took a look at the pictures Joey had on her desk. Most of them were Pacey's, what made him more jealous than ever. How could she? After all he did to her; she still had all that pictures of him, and one from her soul mate, only one damn picture.

Pacey woke up with the sound of people laughing. Last night's events and the talk he had with Joey exhausted him, he tried to study but he couldn't stay awake. He glanced at the alarm clock on his nightstand: 6:30 pm. He wished he could just sleep, but he promised Jen he would go to the party to give his support to her boyfriend. He got up slowly, finding his way to the bathroom, but he stopped when he heard the laughter again. What were they finding so funny? 

"No, guys, really, you don't have any idea what it's like to live everyday with Audrey, I mean, I love her, but the first time I saw her, she really got me scared."

"Jo, can I say one thing? You are really funnier without Dawson around…"

"Jen, who can be funny around Dawson? With all that whining and complaining? God, the guy is an 18 year-old who has a stupid ET doll in his bedroom."

More laughter came from Jack and Jen. Pacey tried his best to not burst into laughter, so he could continue hearing them.

"Joey, he's your soul mate…"

"Jack, this soul mate thing is another one of his delusions… Who can possibly believe in soul mates that you find in your early childhood and are supposed to marry and grow old with…I mean, it's really cute when you're 12, but when you're 18?"

"Joey, maybe all he needs is a help on sex department…you know, see the life beyond the movies…"

"Jen, can you put sex and Dawson on the same sentence? We both dated him; you know what I'm talking about. By the way, sometimes I wonder…"

"What, Joey?" both Jack and Jen had their eyes full of tears of laughter. Even Pacey was trying to hold his laughter to Joey's rant.

"I wonder if Dawson is gay…"

"Joey!!!" Both Jack and Jen exclaimed together.

"Guys, think with me:  he's the only virgin friend we have, he's obsessed with Spielberg and not with some Baywatch girl…And I think he never loved me, I think he's in love with Pace…"

Pacey couldn't resist anymore. He replied, laughing.

"I don't know if I like this idea of being the object of Dawson's affection, Jo…" 

She blushed when she saw him wearing nothing but his boxers.

"But, Pace, it makes sense…the only time he freaked out was when he found out I was in love with you…"

"Jo, are you drunk?" He asked her, confused.

She glared at him and then laughed.

"No, Witter, I'm not drunk…this is pure observation…" she shrugged.

"So this means that I or Jack have to show the facts of life to Dawson?"

"Hey, speak for yourself; Pacey...Dawson is definitely not my type."

"Not mine either, Jackers…"

"Calm down, boys, I wouldn't wish that to you guys…" Joey replied standing up and grabbing Jen's hand.

"C'mon, Jen, let's go get ready for the party while the boys fight over Dawson…"

They left to Jen's room, leaving Jack and Pacey astonished.

"Jack, what's got into her?"

"No idea, Pacey…no idea." They both stared at each other laughing.

**One hour later.**

Jen and Joey were in the living room, waiting for Pacey and Jack.

"Tell me again what made me buy these clothes…."

"Jo, you look great on them…And Pacey agrees with me." She pointes out him, who was standing at the door frame, stunned by Joey's looks.

Pacey stopped on his way when he saw her…she never looked so ...sexy. Leather pants, boots, he could see the lace of her bra through her white shirt, a black coat and heavy make up.

"A sexy vampire, Jo?"

"No, genius, I'm a vampire slayer, see my crucifix?"

"But I'm a vampire…"

"Be careful with your heart then, I could stab it." She played, but immediately regretted the words when she saw the cloud of pain in his eyes. "Sorry, Pacey…I..."

"Jo, I know you're kidding, ok? You don't have to walk on egg shelves around me all the time…"

She sighed and smiled.

"You could always be my Angel, you know"

"All right, Buffy, if Will and Grace here are ready, we can go to this party…Shall we?" 

He offered her his arm, and Jen and Jack followed them, one couple enjoying the fact they were able to talk to each other again and the other wondering how long would take those two to forget about the friendship deal.


	12. Hell of a party part 1

**Disclaimer:** no, I don't own many of them, but I do won Erin and Rick.

**Note:** how long will the friendship deal last? Start making your bets.

The party was definitely a success. Everybody dancing, drinking, and as the clock ticked, Joey was getting more and more nervous. And where was Audrey? She was supposed to get there like an hour ago. Oh, God, what was she thinking when she agreed to go on that stage to sing? She looked to the drink she had on her hand, but getting drunk was not the solution for it. She didn't even noticed Rick coming near her.

"Joey? We have to go now" He whispered to her.

She gave him a weak smile, drinking in one big gulp whatever she had and followed him.

Pacey looked at her, worried. He could sense Joey was nervous and anxious about something, but he couldn't figure out what was. And then she left, with that Rick guy, after drinking all that alcohol…He felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, PJ"

"Erin? I thought you weren't coming…" He turned around surprised.

"You thought I was going to stay at home, crying for you?"

"No, I'm just surprised, just that…" He tried to smile, sensing something would come wrong tonight.

Joey turned her head to the spot where she knew Pacey was, just in time to see him talking to Erin. Oh, that girl, how could she have forgotten about that annoying girl who was attached to him lately? She turned to Rick, whispering something to him.

"Josie, are you sure you wanna do this?" He seemed very surprised by her suggestion.

"Pretty sure, Rick. Now let's rock this party…"

"Great party, Jen, great party…"

"Jack, what you're really finding great are all the gorgeous guys we have here tonight…"

"I'm not blind, I'm single, I can at least look at some cute asses…"

"Did I hear someone mention cute asses?" Pacey mocks.

"Pacey, your modesty shocks me. Hi, Erin, are you fine?"

"I'm fine, and when the big show starts, Jen?"

"I don't know, gotta ask Charlie. There he comes."

Charlie leaned down and whispered something in Jen's ear, making her laugh. She kissed him shouting a good luck as he headed towards the stage. She pulled Jack aside, leaving Pacey and Erin confused, and then coming back smiling mischievously. Then Jack noticed Audrey arriving with company.

"Uh-oh, big trouble at nine o'clock."

"What, Jack?" Jen tried to take a peek over the crowd when she noticed who was with Audrey."

"That's so not good…"

"What is not good, Jen?'

Before Jen could answer, Audrey reached them on her usual loud way, dragging Dawson with her.

"Hey, Jenny Jen, Jackers, look who I found…"

"Dawson? Good to see you, man." Jack hugs him, while Jen grabbed Audrey's hand.

"Audrey, what the hell is Dawson doing here?"

"He showed up at the dorm, looking for Bunny, I brought him here, I thought he was your friend."

"Audrey, he is the guy who caused the troubles between Pacey and Joey…"

"It was not a good idea, so?"

Jen rolled her eyes and the joined the group again, feeling the tense situation they had left Jack. Pacey still hadn't spoken a word to Dawson, they were ignoring each other, when Pacey asked:

"Jen, where is Joey, I saw her leaving with Charlie's friend, and no signs of her yet."

Before Jen could answer, she saw all the guys on the stage, except Joey.

"The show is going to start." She told them, relieved that she wouldn't have to lie about where Joey was.

Dawson looked at his former best friend talking to the pretty brunette he had by his side. She sure looked like a girlfriend, so he didn't have to worry; Pacey would not be an issue to his moves on Joey.

The lights on the stage were turned off, the first accords of music were being heard, when they heard a voice coming from somewhere in the crowd.

How can you see into my eyes like open doors  
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb  
Without a soul   
My spirit sleeping somewhere cold  
Until you find it there and lead it...., back home

That voice…Pacey looked down at the beer he had in hand, no, he wasn't that drunk, but it sure sounded like Joey's voice.  He turned his head to where the voice was coming, and he saw her, microphone in hand, singing, walking towards the stage, the lyrics going inside his mind. His friends looking with no surprise in their eyes, the only one as shocked as him was Dawson.  
(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become

  
 She couldn't believe she was doing this. She couldn't see Pacey's face, but she felt he was shocked. She kept walking, her destination closer now.

  
Now that I know what I'm without  
You can't just leave me  
Breathe into me and make me real  
Bring me to life  
  
(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become  
Bring me to life

  
Pacey felt her approaching, she was getting nearer him. He was still amazed she was doing all that; he was listening to each word she sang, feeling them in his heart.

  
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)  
Bring me to life  
  
Frozen inside without your touch,  
Without your love, darling  
Only you are the life among the dead  
  
All this time I can't believe I couldn't see  
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me  
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems  
Got to open my eyes to everything  
Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul

  
She stopped in front of him, looking inside his blue eyes, knowing that he was the only one understanding what she was trying to say, as she whispered with the song.

Don't let me die here   
(There must be something more!)  
Bring me to life

She turned her back, now finally going to the stage, without even noticing Dawson was there too.  
  
(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become  
Bring me to life  
  
I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside!!  
Bring me to life  
Bring me to life

Pacey couldn't let his gaze off her; she never looked so beautiful and sure of herself, not noticing the angry looks Dawson was giving him. All he could see was Joey, his Joey.


	13. Hell of a party: part 2

**Thanks** to John and Sam for your reviews…and the party goes on.

Joey heard the cheering and the applause, she felt like on one of those teen films where the ugly duck turns into a beautiful swan, and she was the swan this night. After finishing the last song, she hurried back to her friends, being stopped by Jack, who took her in his arms, spinning around.

"I knew, it, Joey, I knew you had it in you!"

"Was it good, Jack?" She asked grinning.

"Bunny, you were so great!!!!" Audrey hugged her too..."I'm so proud of you…"

"We all are" Jen added, together with Charlie.

But there was only one person she wanted to know the opinion. She frowned when she noticed Erin and…Dawson. Joey grabbed Jen's arm and whispered:

"What the hell is Dawson doing here?"

"Don't ask me, Jo."

Pacey excused himself from Erin; she frowned, but she really couldn't do anything, after all she had broken up with him; he needed to talk to Joey. He was surprised, but he was proud to see that girl, that woman, finding her strength, her own way to face the world.

"Hey, Jo" were the only words he could say.

"Hey, Pace" She suddenly felt really shy. "Did you like it?"

"You were wonderful up there…and down here too" He felt he was grinning stupidly.

Dawson saw the exchange disgusted. She didn't even mention she had seen him, but she could be all blushing and grinning with the guy who broke her heart, who had left her alone and pregnant. And those clothes, what was she thinking? Where was his little Joey?

"You won't even say 'hello', Joey?" He interrupted the magic.

"Hello, Dawson" she answered coldly. Dawson here would certainly take half of the fun of the party. "I don't know why I thought you were safe and resting in LA…"

"Jo, you haven't seen me since June and is this the way you talk to me? I came 'cause I missed you, and I wanted to talk to you." He whined.

"Have you ever heard about that little thing called telephone, invented by Graham Bell in the 19th century? It makes wonders when you wanna just talk to people…" She replied sarcastically.

"Joey, you can't be serious…I wanna talk to you, you're not making sense…" Dawson couldn't believe on Joey's words.

"Dawson, in case you haven't noticed yet, this is a party and in parties we don't have the kind of conversation you always want to have. In parties we have fun, get drunk and even make out when the occasion appears, so, if you excuse me…Pacey, what is that you're drinking?" she decided to throw all the caution to the wind.

"Try for yourself." He was trying his best to not laugh in Dawson's face…He was loving this new wild side from Joey.

She drank all he had in his glass…It was strong, but sweet, just like him. She handled the empty recipient to him. "Wanna dance?"

"No, Potter, thanks…you know I suck on this…" He knew he wouldn't be able to resist to her charms if he did so.

"Tsc, tsc…shame on you, Mr. Witter…Jackers! Come dance with me!"

Pacey chuckled amused when he saw her grabbing something else to drink while dancing with Jack. She never could hold her alcohol; he just hoped she wouldn't do anything stupid. Dawson on his side never felt so angry, so humiliated, he turned to Pacey:

"Are you letting her do this?"

"Dawson, in case you haven't noticed, Joey is a big girl; she can take care of herself." He answered nonchalantly.

Dawson didn't answer. He went to where Joey was happily dancing with Jack and Rick, grabbed her arm, ignoring her protests, taking her to the quietest place he could find. Pacey went after them just to watch, and if Dawson did anything that would hurt Joey, then he would do something like introducing his big head to the nearest wall…

"Ouch, Dawson, that hurts, you know?'

"Joey, what the hell is wrong with you? You're drinking, wearing these clothes, all this make up…'

"Dawson, you can't be that oblivious…it's a Halloween party, this is a costume, ok? And yes, I'm drinking; I already told you people usually do that in parties…"She rolled her eyes.

"Joey, I don't understand what is going on…you never act like this…not the Joey Potter I grew up with and…"

"Dawson, I changed…when you grow up that happens. "

"You don't even talk to me, Joey."

"Dawson, do I need to take you down memory line? Did you forget everything that happened back in June?"

"So you can't forget what happened in June when it concerns to me, but you sure seemed to forget everything related to Pacey." He answered bitterly.

She rolled her eyes again…she looked at his angry face, getting red as he became more and more angry, his forehead looking some kind of alert sign. He could be so childish sometimes.

"Dawson, what happens or not happens between Pacey and I is my and Pacey's business, do you get that? Look, you came here all your way from LA, to talk to me, I really appreciate that, but it's not the time or place for this conversation."

"Joey, I don't understand why you're acting like this… how can't you forgive me? You know how much I love you…"

"Dawson Leery, don't even get me started. When will you put in this big head of yours that I don't love you like this? And I never will. Wanna know hwy? I, Josephine Potter, am head over heels in love with Pacey Witter…"

"How you can forgive him, love him? He left you alone and pregnant and he was with another girl while you were up there humiliating yourself for his attention, for God's sake."

"I know he was with a girl, but I can't help it, it's stronger than me, you know?"

Pacey heard what she said, he felt right the same way...what were they thinking when they decided to be just friends? Sure they had issues enough to let Freud busy for awhile, but how long would they be able to deny their feelings?

"This is not you, Joey. The Joey I know…"

"Dawson, I'm not some freaking character you can script what I am or am not. When you put your brains back to work, you can talk to me, as a friend, nothing more, do you get it? Now, if you excuse me, I have a party to attend."

She left him alone, wanting to get away from him as fast as she could. Dawson stood there all by himself, wondering when the world as he knew it had turned upside down.


	14. Girls and Knights

**Note:** Do you remember Future Tense? Drunken Joey is back. There's an old Latin saying which says: _In vino_ _veritas, that means, you when you're drunk, you speak the truth. Will this happen?_

Pacey glanced at the passenger seat where Joey was with her best pout face. After her conversation with Dawson she came back to the party, dancing and drinking like he had never seen before. She even got him to dance with her for a while, making him pray for his soul whenever he felt her perfume or her body touching his, that means, all the time she was near him. At one point, he realized Dawson and Erin had gone, Jack was MIA, Audrey was making out with a guy that was on one of his classes, Jen was with Charlie and Joey…well, Joey was loaded with enough alcohol to set the place on fire, and he was not much sober himself, so he decided to take her home, before they both lose control of their actions.

"Here we are, Ms. Potter. What's the pout face for?" He asked, unfastening his seatbelt.

"I'm not talking to you." She answered, avoiding his eyes.

"Really?" He replied amused. "And why are you not talking to me?"

"You took me away from the party…" The pouting drunken tones in her voice making him want to laugh.

"I'm kind sleepy and we both have to work tomorrow. Audrey was making out, Jen and Charlie were on their way to his place, and Jack was MIA, so I was the only one available to bring you back home safe."

He was more than surprised when he heard her giggling.

"Jack is gonna get laid…" she said singing.

"And how do you know that, Jo?"

"Duh…"She looked at him as if it was very obvious what she was saying. "He was with Rick."

"Rick? The same Rick from the band?" He couldn't believe he had been jealous…

"Yeah, Pace, that Rick… unless you know another one…" She rolled her eyes.

He looked at her; she had a devious smile on her face.

"Are you telling me I was jealous about a gay guy?"

"Ha, I knew it...you just admitted you were jealous. It was so funny…" she said laughing.

He shook his head not believing in her, but soon he was laughing with her. He climbed off the car, opening the door on her side for her to do the same.

"C'mon, party girl.  Time to go to bed."

"Are you taking me to bed?" She smiled, poking her head out of the car.

"Joey, you are too drunk  ..."

"You're no fun, Mr. Witter, and I'm not drunk!" she climbed off the car, her face full of indignation, but she tripped, almost falling"Maybe just a little…"

"A little? Potter, you had half of the liquor they had there…"

"Pacey, I don't feel so good now."

"Really? Guess what? You'll be even worse tomorrow. C'mon, I'll help you."

"Pace?" She looked at him with puppy dog eyes." I can't walk on my own feet."

"No way, Potter, I'm not carrying you."

"Please?" 

"Don't gimme the eyes, it's not gonna work."

She threw her arms around his neck; she knew he was almost giving in.

"Please? I'm so tired, Pace."

"Uh-uh. You're gonna walk." He put his arm round her waist, supporting her and she had to tag along, unwillingly.

"Potter, c'mon, we're almost there."

"I'm tired." She whined.

"Ok, ok" He picked her up, and she put her arms around his neck, resting her head on his shoulder, putting her back on the floor when they reached her door, trying to ignore his feelings. She opened the door, after fumbling for a while in her bag for her keys and entered the room, plopping on her bed. He followed her, not so sure why he was doing that. He looked at her for a second she had her eyes closed, but he knew she wasn't sleeping yet.

"Jo, why did you drink so much?" He sat on the bed beside her.

"No, Pace, don't Dawson on me." She opened her eyes facing him.

"Dawson on you?"

"Yeah, Dawson on me, you know, try to analyze every different thing I do as something from a Twilight Zone episode. I just wanted to have fun." She smiled, closing her eyes again. "And I had lots of fun tonight."

"That you did, Jo." God, he wanted to kiss her so badly, she looked so adorable in her drunken state, eyes closed, a smile on her lips. Suddenly she opened her eyes, and stood up.

"What's wrong, Jo?'

"I need to change my clothes." She tried to stay, but she was feeling really dizzy.

"Joey, lay back, I'll help you." He went to her dresser, not so surprised to find one of his missing hockey jerseys in her drawer. "Think this is not yours, Potter."

"Of course it is."

"Joey, it's written Witter in it."

"You gave it to me, silly."

"I don't remember doing that…"

"Pacey, it's called ex- girlfriend's memorabilia."

He turned around with his, better, her jersey, to find her free of her shirt and fighting with her pants. He tried to swallow the lump in his throat at the sight.

"Stop ogling me. You have seen me naked before."

"I've gotta go, Joey, or I won't be able to control myself around you and that's not a good thing." He exhaled loudly.

She took the jersey from his hands, dressing it and removing her pants, sitting again on her bed and she looked at him, whispering.

"And if I don't want you to go?"

"Jo, we both agreed we have to step back and…" He kneeled in front of her, trying to fight temptation.

"Pacey, has anyone told you that you talk way too much?" she cupped his face, kissing him.

The small amount of self control he had was thrown away when he felt her lips on his. He felt her tongue against his, dueling for dominance, her taste, mixed with alcohol, but still her taste. He let go from her mouth, kissing her neck, nipping her earlobe, his hands touching her body through the shirt, and for the second time that day, they were again on a bed, trying to feel as much as they could of each other. He felt her taking off his shirt, but he stopped her when her hands reached his pants.

"Wait, Jo."

"What, Pace?" Her eyes full of desire.

"We have to stop."

"Why?" She pouted.

"First, 'cause I don't have condoms here with me and second, I don't wanna make love to you after so long when you're drunk and won't remember exactly what we did and worse, will regret it."

"You're still my night in a shinning armor, huh?" She whispered, kissing him softly.

"Jo, you're killing me here." 

"But are you still staying with me?"

"I don't think I should." He started, but when he saw the sad look she gave him, he agreed." Ok, but you have to behave yourself and try to keep your hands off me, ok?" He didn't resist to his need to kiss her again.

"Ok, but can you keep your hands off me?" She provoked, kissing the spot between his ear and his neck.

"Jo, if you do that again, I'll go."

"Ok, ok…"She smiled. He got up, took off his pants and only in his boxers he joined her in her bed, putting the comforters over them and soon she settled in his arms, her head on his shoulder. They remained silent for a while, but he turned his head to she was laughing uncontrollably.

"What's so funny, Jo?"

"We are pathetic, you know. We couldn't resist each other for 24 hours." She stopped laughing.

"We are pathetic; I have to agree with you." He kissed her forehead and let out a huge yawn. "Try to sleep, sweetie." He smiled when he saw she had already drifted off, knowing his was in for a long night.


	15. Morning after

**Disclaimer**: no, I still don't own a piece of it.

**Thanks** for the reviews…and I didn't plan to Pacey sound a jerk, but he's been hurt, and when you're hurt, sometimes you are a jerk

Dawson paced around his hotel room. He didn't have much sleep the past night. He left the damn party after Joey's outburst. What had gotten you to her? She never spoke to him like that; it was like she was possessed by some evil spirit. He needed to see her, to talk to her out of influence of alcohol, she had to be reasonable and see what was best for her. Resolution made, he would go back to her dorm and try to make her see things clearer.

Joey woke up, her head heavy and aching. She realized that the comfortable surface she was sleeping on wasn't her pillow and the strong arms around her and last night's events came to her mind.  She slowly opened her eyes, a little bit afraid of what she would see, but all she saw was a pair of shining blue eyes and a smile.

"Are you ok?" Pacey asked, pushing away a loose strand of her hair that was on her face.

"I feel like I have a marching band inside my head." She groaned. She heard him chuckle lightly and kiss her forehead.

"I told you" He looked into her eyes serious." Do you regret it?"

"Drinking?" She teased.

"No, the kiss."

"Kissing you was one of the right things I did last night. But I regret the situation, Pace. I had told you we had to solve our issues before anything else and for starters, you have a girlfriend."  

"No, I don't, Erin broke up with me, and I don't know why she tried to be around all the time last night." She opened her mouth to talk, a look of a surprise in her features. "Jo, listen" He let her go of his arms and turned to her, supporting his head by his hand. "I know we both have issues, lots of unanswered questions between the two of us, but…I want to be near you, these past months I tried to ignore you, 'cause I know that the moment I started talking to you, that would never be enough, that I'd want to kiss you, touch you all the time. You said last night: we're pathetic, we couldn't resist 24 hours, and if that's pathetic, I'm for sure one of the most pathetic men in this world."

"You didn't have to tell me you're pathetic, I already knew it." She teased, trying to hide the wave of happiness she was feeling. "But don't you think we should sit and talk about this? You know, like a plan?"

"Joey, you know I'm not good in plans, they always fail. I'm much more a man of action…" He leaned over, kissing her, their mouths full of hunger. Joey moaned when his tongue touched hers and his arms pushed her closer, she buried her hands on his hair, trying to keep him as close as she could. They broke the kiss, panting.

"This sounds a great plan to me, Pace." She whispered while he kissed her face, her neck. "But, are you sure, Pace?" She cupped his face so she could see his eyes.

"Potter, I'm dead sure. If we do what we didn't the first time, like trusting each other enough to tell what is wrong, our fears and insecurities, everything we'll be just fine."

"I can do that" She smiled, hiding her face in his neck. "I'm terrified right now"

He put one finger under her chin, lifting her face.

"I'm scared too, Jo. I'm really scared. I'm scared we will make the same mistakes; that I'll have my heart broken all over again, but you know what scares me most? You, out of my life."

She smiled, feeling tears in her eyes. He brushed them away with his thumb. She closed her eyes for a while, reveling in his touch. They remained silent for a moment, words weren't really necessary.

"Pacey, I wanna make things right this time, and if anyone is not happy that we're together, I'll tell him to take care of his own business, nobody will come between us, I promise you." She didn't name anyone, but they both knew who she was talking about.

He nodded, the feeling that they could actually make it this time, warming his heart, so he was grinning like a Cheshire cat. 

"Like you did last night?"

"You were eavesdropping?" 

"I went after you, in case you needed me, and I can say I loved every word you said." He tightened his arms around her. "Why don't you repeat them?" 

"You already heard I it once, I don't think you need it again." She knew exactly what words he was talking about

"Oh, believe me; I do need to hear those words again." He nuzzled her neck.

"I, Josephine Potter, am head over heels in love with Pacey Witter." 

"Actually were those about Dawson having to put his brain cells to work." He wasn't giving in so easily.

"Witter, shut up." She kissed him again, not giving him time to retort. They rolled on the bed, in a way she was now straddling him, he put his hands on her ass, pressing him against his arousal. Their hands learning again the lines of their bodies through the few clothing they had. Joey was the first to break the kiss this time.

"We have to stop, Pace." She moaned when he felt his fingers on her breast. "Pace, please"

He stopped the kiss, looking into her eyes, they couldn't have sex without protection, she was right, they couldn't risk her getting pregnant again.

"Why didn't I bring some condoms with me?" He sounded so helpless, that made her laugh.

"Because you are dumb, sweetheart." She smiled, kissing him softly. "I'm going to take a shower. Alone." She added when he raised his eyebrows maliciously.

"You're no fun, Potter." He pouted.

"Later, Pace, later." She kissed him again. "I'll be right back"

He laid there, he hadn't feel like this in a long time; he knew hard times would come, but his world was complete again. He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he almost didn't notice Joey coming back, her wet hair on her shoulders, her body wrapped in a towel, making him have all the kind of dirty thoughts about her.

"This is a mean torture, Potter." He whined.

"Pacey, I have to get dressed."

"No, you don't" He stood up, embracing her from behind and kissing her shoulder, while she looked inside her dresser, when they heard someone knocking at the door.

"Pacey, can you get that? It must be Audrey who forgot where she put her keys."

He went to the door, feeling that he could kill Audrey for the interruption, but he was much less pleased when he had to face Dawson staring angrily at him.


	16. Threaten

**Disclaimer: **no, I don't own it.

"What the hell is going on here?" Dawson yelled at them, jumping to the obvious conclusion, due to the fact that Pacey and Joey were barely dressed.

"What's wrong with you, man? It's not like you're the betrayed husband." Pacey answered.

"So, you can't talk to me, but you can go and spend the whole night fucking him." Dawson looked daggers at both of them.

"Dawson, what's the fuck wrong with you? I told you yesterday that what happens between Pacey and I is my business." 

"So this is why you weren't even bothered she was getting wasted last night. So you could have all your way with her."

"Look, Dawson, you have no right to come here and talk to me or Joey like this." Pacey grabbed him by his collar.

"Pacey, let him go." Pacey obeyed, unwillingly. Dawson smiled evilly. "Don't look so happy, Dawson" She glared at him. "I'm telling you for the last time: this is not your business." She adds coldly.

"I can't believe in my eyes on how you're behaving, Joey, you're getting drunk, dressing like a whore, humiliating yourself to go dirty with Pacey? And the way you're treating me, your best friend!"

Joey sensed that Pacey was about to grab Dawson again, but with one look, he held himself. This was Joey's fight, not his.

"Dawson, if you were really my friend you would not judge me, you would accept my choices, even if you don't like them."

"Joey, listen to me, you can't do this to yourself, and you know Pacey is not right for you." He approached to her.

"How dare you tell me what's right for me? I'm not a doll which you can manipulate."

Dawson grabbed Joey's arms, fiercely.

"Joey, you've gotta listen to me…" Joey winced in pain.

That was too much for Pacey, he grabbed Dawson, pushing him against the wall.

"Look, Dawson, now you've gone too far. You can say whatever you want but you never, never, listen to me, can hurt her, you got me?" He said angrily. "I think it's better for you to go, before I have to introduce your face to my hand."

"What's stopping you? Are you afraid of me?"

"Dawson, don't tease me." 

"Pace, it's not worthy it." Joey told him. "And Dawson, if this is the way you treat your best friends, maybe you shouldn't have friends. Put in your big air head that I don't need such kind of friend. Now go, before I do what Pacey wants to do."

Pacey released Dawson, who punched him, catching him out of guard. Dawson, went out, and then turned around telling them both: "This is not over." He slammed the door.

Joey ran to Pacey, who was leaning against the wall.

"Pacey, are you ok?" She touched his face.

"Yeah, you should have let me beat that bastard. Ouch, this hurts."

"Oh, Pace, why did he have to show up and ruin our morning?" She hugged him. He put his arms around her, holding her as close as he could, as she started crying.

"Shh, Jo, it's over, I will have nothing more than a black eye, just that…"

"I can't believe he said those things to me, Pace, and the threat in his voice when he left." She said between sobs.

"Jo, don't worry, I'll be here for you." It was breaking his heart to see her crying like that.

"I'm not worried about me, I'm worried about you, Pace." She lifted her wet eyes.

"He won't do anything, baby" He kissed her forehead. "Now, I don't wanna see more tears, ok?"

"Ok" She managed to smile, but in her heart she felt she wasn't going to feel safe until Dawson was back to LA.

Dawson walked furiously back to his hotel. How could she do that? Didn't she know she belonged to him, not to Pacey? He couldn't go back to LA. He had to have her back.


	17. Jinxed

**Disclaimer: **unfortunately, I don't own them

**Note:** Thanks to everybody, John, be sure you won't  miss this update, ok? Things are getting hotter between P/J, maybe I will have to change the classification here. Enjoy and tell me what you think.

Joey opened the door to find a smiley Pacey waiting for her. Before she could form any word, he threw his arms around her, kissing her hungrily, leading her to her bed, closing the door behind them with his foot. They fell on the bed, Pacey all over her, still kissing, tongue meeting tongue, caressing each other feverishly. They broke the kiss breathless.

"Hello to you, too." Joey whispered, while he continued kissing her neck, his tongue tracing her earlobe, making her shiver and moan.

"Hi" He didn't stop his assault, his hands now roaming over her body.

"Pace, I don't know if I like the ways our relationship is taking…" Joey writhed when she felt his hands under her shirt, touching her breast.

"What's wrong, Jo?" He froze, finally looking at her face.

 "You don't ask me how I am anymore, doesn't say I love you anymore…it's just this embarrassing grope fest…" She teased, raking her fingers through his hair.

"I see how much you find it embarrassing…" He nipped her shoulder, making her moan.

"Pacey, a girl needs to her some sweet nothings to get in the mood, you know?" She kissed his face.

"How about: I love you, Joey?" He asked, taking off her shirt.

"You used to be much better in this, Pace…Only this won't make you get into my pants." She rolled them over, straddling him.

He rolled them over again, sitting and throwing his own shirt over his head.

"How about: Potter, I'm crazy for you, I could die with out you." He grinned when she threw her arms around his neck, bringing his mouth to hers, in a hot kiss.

"Nope, not enough." She nuzzled his neck, her hands tracing circles around his nipple, smiling against his lips when she heard him groan in pleasure, pressing his body against her.

"Joey, I've been dying to make love to you passionately, restless, until we both can't move a muscle, until we both feel we're one heart, one body, one soul." 

'That's much better." She searched fro his belt, trying to open his jeans, but he stopped her. "What?" She asked her eyes darkened of desire.

"Where's Audrey, Jo?" He managed to ask while she kept on her task of freeing him of his jeans.

"She's said she was going to stay the night with Luke." She smiled, touching him through his boxers. 

"No more interruptions?" His hand searching for her bra's clasp.

"Nope, we have the room for ourselves to make love passionately, restless, until we both can't move a muscle." She quoted him, while his mouth found its way to her breasts. She gasped when he took her nipple on his mouth, the tingling devouring her body, his hands heading south to remove her pants.

"God, Pacey…"

And right then a crying Audrey entered the room, making them stop, breathless and speechless. They covered themselves the best they could, while Audrey threw herself on her bed, in sobs. 

"Audrey, what happened?" Joey asked worriedly, after sliding her shirt back. 

"He is cheating on me." She answered between sobs. Audrey had been going out with Luke since the Halloween party. 

Pacey took that as his cue to get dressed and leave. Joey went with him to the door, looking at him helpless.

"Pace…I'm sorry…" She looked as frustrated as him.

"There's no need to explanation, Jo. I'll stop by at 8 am tomorrow, so we can go to Capeside, ok?" He kissed her forehead, hugging her. 

"Ok, call me later?" She kissed him softly, not letting him go, but knowing she should help her friend.

"I will. Good night, Jo" He kissed her again.

"Night, sweetie." She kissed him for the last time, sighing, watching him leave. It was final: they've been jinxed.

Next morning Pacey, Joey, Jack, Jen, Charlie and Audrey stopped in a little diner in the road to Capeside to have breakfast. Jen noticed Audrey's puffy eyes, Joey and Pacey looking miserable, like they hadn't slept all night. Something must have happened. She used the excuse she had to use the bathroom, dragging Joey along.

"Spill it, Joey. What's wrong?"

"Jen, I have never been so frustrated in my whole life."

"Trouble in paradise? But I thought you two were happy together again."

"We are happy in being together, but we actually have not 'be together', you know." She threw her hands in the air in exasperation.

"No?" Jen was surprised. "You guys haven't slept together yet? But it's almost a month…"

"Don't remind me that. I don't know; it seems like a curse." She looked lost.

"Pacey is too young for this kind of problem…"

"Jen, it's not this kind of problem... Things are working like a clock. But every time we're about to do it, something happens."

Jen chuckled lightly. Now Pacey's showers in the middle of the night were making more sense.

"Jen this is absolutely not funny." Joey rolled her eyes.

"But what happened?" She tried to hold back her laughter.

"You see, since we got together, things happened. Day one: first I was to drunk to do anything, we had no protection. Next morning, Dawson showed up, and made that whole scene. The first days, I was shaken by the events, so we didn't try to do anything. Then, Pacey got the flu, after I got the flu. When we were both healthy, Pacey made up all that dinner at your place…"

"Where Jack arrived home unexpectedly and joined you in your romantic dinner." Jen laughed.

Joey glared at her, how could anyone possibly find this so funny?

"Next try: we were making out in his room and you came in without knocking because you needed a book."

"Hey, I already apologized for that."

"I haven't finished yet…Then we decided to try it in my room. We were making out, and when things were about to happen, Pacey realized he had forgotten to bring the condoms. And finally yesterday…"

"What happened yesterday, Joey?" Jen was feeling really sorry fro her friends.

 "Audrey had told me she was going to spend the night at Luke's, so I called Pace, and when we were half naked, Audrey arrived crying, because she found out Luke was cheating on her." She sighed heavily.

"You really have to look for new friends with better timing."

"What I know is that we're both like we were when I was a virgin. I want to, he wants to, but we can't, so we are tuned on horny mode 100% of the time." 

"I never thought I was going to hear you discuss your sex life with me in a road diner, no less."

"Jen, I'm desperate. Anytime I look at him, I want to ravish him…"

"Joey, you can't be that impatient…"

"No? Jen, every time I look at Pacey I think he's a walking sex machine, my knees go weak…"

"Joey, you've got it bad."

"You have no idea. And we won't have a chance the next days…" 

"You could always..."

"Jen, it's Thanksgiving, the first time we go home since school has started. I think Bess won't be thrilled to have me sleeping with Pace under her roof after the summer's events, Pacey's house: off limits, your house, I don't think Grams will give us her blessings and Doug will certainly not appreciate any kind of mating rituals on his couch."

"So we will have to go through all this holiday with Audrey mopping around and you and Pacey longing for each other?"

"It seems so…" Joey answered, sadly. 

They headed back to their table, where the guys and Audrey waited for them. They went back to the car, returning to their trip back home.


	18. Stalker

**Disclaimer**: nope, I don't own them

**Note:** If anyone doesn't like Dawson, stop reading now…And thanks for all your reviews.

Pacey stopped the car in front of the B&B's. He helped Joey and Audrey with their luggage, taking it to the front door, and then went back to his car, to go to his parents' house, followed by Joey.

"I'm going there, but I'll probably crash at Doug's, ok?" He put his arms around her, holding her closer.

"Will you come here later?" She nuzzled his neck.

"After you assure me that Bess won't rip my guts off." He kissed her forehead.

"Scary cat!" She kissed him, pushing him closer, the kiss soon escalating into passion.

"Jo, Jo, this is torture…" He whispered huskily.

"But a good one, huh?" She winked at him. "I've gotta go. See ya tonight?"

"I'll be here" He kissed her a last time, got into the car and left.

She turned around when she heard Bessie calling her.

"Joey!!! How I missed you, little sister." Bessie hugged her.

"I missed you too, Bess. How is Alex? And Bodie?" They go to the front door, arm in arm.

"They're fine, Alex is taking a nap and Bodie is cooking your favorites."

"Bessie, this is Audrey, I hope you don't mind I brought her along."

"Hi, Audrey, nice to put a face on your name."

"Hi, Bessie, it's nice to meet you too, and thanks for letting me stay here."

"Don't mention it; a friend of Joey's is always welcome in this house." 

They took all their stuff to Joey's old room and Audrey excused herself, going to the bathroom. Bessie looked to Joey, who had thrown herself on her bed.

"Excuse Audrey if she's not quite social today, she broke up with her boyfriend yesterday." Joey explained.

"And you are very social, huh?" 

"What do you mean, Bess?" She furrowed her eyebrows in doubt.

"I saw you being very social with a certain Witter boy a few moments ago." Bessie told her.

"Bessie…" She started to explain.

"Joey, I just wanna know that you are not getting your heart broken this time, ok? I noticed how happy you are, but that doesn't mean I forgot how you were when you left for school, and it was Pacey's fault."

"Bess, he didn't get me pregnant alone and I was the one who didn't tell him."

"Joey, if you are happy, fine, just be careful, ok?" She sat on the bed beside her sister.

"Bess, we are talking about everything, trying to solve our issues, instead of assuming each other's feelings like we did in the past. Promise me you won't give us a hard time." Joey begged.

"Well, you are old enough to know what you're doing and despite everything that happened, you know I like Pacey. But I'm not letting him off the hook so easily."

"Thanks, Bess. This is really important for me"

"I know, sis. Tell Audrey that lunch time is in about an hour, ok?" 

Joey closed her eyes, sighing; things were going great so far. Then, one thought clouded her mind. Dawson should be here for Thanksgiving too. And one thing still bothered her, although Pacey had said that the letter he left for her was no longer important, she needed to know what had happened to it, and she had a strange feeling that Dawson would be the answer to it. But enough thoughts of Dawson, she told to herself, picking up her phone and dialed Pacey's number, the simple act of hearing his voice bringing a smile on her lips.

Audrey rolled her eyes as she heard Joey already on the phone with Pacey, it made her feel lonely and sad. After a couple of 'I love you's ', Joey clicked off the phone, smiling, only then noticing that Audrey was back.

"Sorry, Aud, but I had to talk to him."

"Bunny, you had you tongue down his throat what? Ten minutes ago?" She pointed ironically.

"Audrey, things will be better, you'll see." 

Audrey shrugged, trying to seem not so disturbed.

"At least, Bunny, I have now a good excuse to spend all my money on shopping, to wash my sorrows away." 

"Now, that's my old friend Audrey back." Joey smiled, knowing well enough that Audrey would be back to her normal self in a couple of days.

Later that night, Joey was impatiently waiting for Pacey. The rest of the Boston gang had shown up, Charlie had brought his guitar, everybody was warm inside and she was like a fool, out in November cold waiting for her boy friend. She walked to her dock, sitting; it had been a long time she last did this. She heard the steps behind her, and without looking she knew who was. He put his hands on her eyes, blinding her.

"Guess who?"

"It can't be my boyfriend, he told me he would be here an hour ago." She smiled when he sat beside her, his arm on her shoulder, bringing her closer.

"It was kind of hard to get out of the Witters' Nut House. I'm still not used to mom and dad actually talking to me, seeming so truly interested in my life." He kissed her forehead. His relationship with his parents had improved a lot since he was admitted into college, somehow made his parents finally realize he wasn't a loser.

"I feel for you, sweetie." She replied in mock sympathy. He kissed her softly, but when he felt her tongue caressing his, her mouth molded into his, digging his fingers into her hair, passionately. He closed his teeth on her lower lip, sucking it.

"This sex deprivation is driving me nuts, Jo" his voice not more than a husky whisper.

"Not only you...and it seems we won't have a chance this weekend." She moaned when he nipped her neck.

"We could always try that back seat thing, you know?" He was grinning maliciously.

"Pace, in our current lack of luck, we would get busted by your brother or your father, no less."

"Damn, I knew my family would ruin my moment somehow."

She kissed him again, smiling.

"Bess wants to talk to you." 

"I guess it's not the weather she wants to talk about, huh?"

"No, but I'll stand by you, don't worry. And, I promise I'll make up for you any harsh things she might even say to you." She added, not so accidentally letting her hand brush his groin. Before he could do or say something, she stood up, running back to the house, with Pacey right after.

"Josephine Potter, come back here, you little tease."

She turned around, poking out her tongue, laughing.

"You can't show me your tongue like this, unless you're planning to use it" He reached her, taking her in his arms, spinning her around.

"Who said I don't?" She teased, putting her arms around his neck.

"Are you trying to kill me? 'Cause it's working." He tightened his arms around her, so she could feel how the simple thought of what her tongue could do had affected him.

Her answer was bring him closer, closing his mouth with hers, her tongue fighting with his for dominance, her fingers in his hair, she felt his hands on the small of her back, pushing her against his hard on, forming a lump on her throat.

"Huh, huh." They froze when they heard someone cleaning her throat.

"You guys need to get a room." Jen told them. 

"Tell us something we don't know." Joey sighed. "Shall we, Pace?"

"Your wish is my command, my lady." They entered the house, not noticing the car parked or the driver that looked at the couple devoured by envy. Dawson.


	19. That thing

**Thanks** for all who waited, but I'm working on a new story that is taking all my time, so sorry fro the long time I took to update this one.

Dawson didn't know what had made him go there and worse, watch them form his car. After that fatidic morning, he decided to go back to LA, scared of what his parents should do, but he hated LA. He was no golden boy there and he felt the only way to gain Joey back was being closer to her. And watching her with Pacey made his insides revolve in bitterness. How could she want to be with Pacey and not him? Maybe because he wasn't around…The only way to stop that was coming back home. Tomorrow, he thought to himself, he would tell her and maybe everything would be back to normal, with him around she would sure be back to be his little Joey Potter. He started the car, glancing once more the B&B's porch, where Pacey and Joey were getting into the house after kissing again, and left, angry and envious.

Pacey felt really uncomfortable when he walked inside the B&B hand in hand with Joey for the first time in a long time. He thanked God Bodie wasn't home, he had to face only Bessie and by the way she was looking at him, that would be enough trouble. 

"So you managed to bring the lovebirds inside, Jen…"Jack teased them both.

"Jackers, it's been not more than five minutes that Pacey arrived." Joey replied.

"Pacey, I'd like to talk to you." Bessie interrupted. "Alone" she glanced Joey, before she could speak.

"Straight to the point, Bess, fine, let's talk." Pacey followed Bessie to the kitchen, after receiving a reassuring hug form Joey.

The first thing Bessie did as soon as they were out of Joey's sight was grabbing Pacey's ears, like he was a little boy, making him sit, while she remained standing up in front of him.

"Ouch, Bess, that hurts, you know?"

"You listen to me, Pacey Witter. I won't object to the fact that you and Joey are back together for two reasons:  first cause I can't control you guys, since you live in the same city and I don't, and even if you lived here, I don't know if I would be able to keep Joey at safe distance from you." Her voice low, but harsh.

"And the second, Bessie?" He dared to ask.

"You make her happy." Her voice softened. "and wipe this cocky grin off your face. You were not here while she cried night after night for you and everything that happened. How could you leave her like that, Pacey?"

"Bessie, I didn't know she was pregnant, do you really think that I would've left if Jo had told me she was pregnant then?" His voice full of hurt.

"Pacey, I know she didn't tell you, ok? I just want to keep it clear that my sister won't get hurt again."

"Bess, do you think that I would do anything deliberated to hurt Joey? And I got hurt in the process too, or do you think it was easy for me to see her at the prom with Dawson kissing her or to write her a letter asking her to meet me so we could talk before I leave and never getting an answer? Do you have any idea of how it was to leave without looking back and spend three months at the sea, looking at the sky at night and seeing her face in every star?" He asked, raising his voice, his blue eyes with tears.

Bessie didn't know what to answer, she just looked at Pacey.

"Pacey, just make sure you both are not going through the same mistakes again. I don't wanna see her broken like that again."

"Bess, I promise you, I'm never leaving Joey again, because if I do that, I can't live. Whether it's difficult, rough and painful, I have to be by her side to feel…"He wanted Bessie to believe him so badly.

"Alive. It's how she speaks of you." Bess smiled. "Are we clear now, Witter?"

"Crystal, Bess." He let off a shy smile.

"So, now, come her, you big dork. I missed having you around." She said, hugging a surprised Pacey. "now, go make that girl smile." 

He left the kitchen, while Bessie turned her attention to something that was in the oven, but turned around when he heard her voice."

"And Pacey, just one more thing: if you get Joey pregnant again before you two graduate from college, I'll castrate you, ok?"

"Yes, m'am." He chuckled softly. 

Later that night, Joey and Pacey were sitting by the fireplace; she was on his lap, he was happy in just having her there, but he felt she was distant, worried with something.

"Jo, baby, what's wrong?" He tried to read into her eyes.

"Nothing, Pace." She ducked her head, avoiding his gaze.

"Joey, I know there's something wrong. I can feel it." He kissed he forehead, putting one finger under her chin, lifting her face. "We promised we wouldn't hide anything from each other."

She sighed heavily.

"I'm worried about tomorrow. Bess invited everyone to have Thanksgiving dinner here."

"And by everyone, you include the Leery's."

"Yeah…Pace, I don't wanna see him, and I didn't tell Bess what happened on Halloween, and I don't know what to do."

He tightened his arms around her, trying to comfort her.

"Jo, I don't wanna see Dawson too, but we're not gonna hide, 'cause we're not doing anything wrong here. All we have to do is avoid the guy and not let him spoil our second Thanksgiving as a couple." He smiled.

"I wish we could celebrate alone, just the two of us."

"I wish that we could do that too, but we owe this to Bess, she's really happy to have you back home."

"I know…have I ever told you how sweet you are?" she smiled at him.

"Yep, but you can say it again and again, that I don't mind." He kissed her gently.

"Hey, Pace, you know what I would love do now?"

"Joey, we can't, I on probation with your sister, remember?"

"Not that, dumbass." She smacked his chest softly. "That thing."

"You wanna do that thing?" He asked, raising one eyebrow suggestively.

"Yep, that thing." She kissed him, getting off his lap, taking his hand, leading him to her bedroom. She turned on the lamp on her nightstand, and they cuddled up together, while Pacey's voice lulled her to sleep, while he read to her, until he fell asleep too.

Bessie answered the phone; it was Doug wanting to know if Pacey was still there. She went to the living room, no sign of him. She noticed the light in Joey's room, opening the door to find the couple sleeping in each other's arms, over the sheets, Pacey still holding the book. She took it from him carefully, covered them with a comforter and turned off the light, smiling.

.  


	20. Thanksgiving from Hell

Here I am again, back from my ever present writer's block. Hope you like it.

**Thanks** for all the reviews, you guys are really kind to me

Every second that brought dinner time closer made Joey more and more anxious and nervous. Mrs. Ryan, Jen, Jack and Charlie had already arrived. She was standing on the porch, while everybody was inside the warm house, waiting for Pacey, he had gone to his parents' to see his sister Gretchen, but promised to be by her side when the Leerys arrived. Jen came out to search for her friend, who didn't even notice her presence.

"Joey, it's freezing outside here..."

"I'm waiting for Pace." She put a lose strand of hair beside her ear.

"Jo, he would agree with me, come inside, there's no use waiting here, you may have pneumonia..."

Jen heard the sigh of relief, and the change in her face when she saw Pacey's car arriving. 

"Ok, I'm going inside; I don't wanna see your public displays of affection."

Pacey left the car, worried by the way Joey was standing there. He knew her well enough to feel how nervous she was.

"Pace, why did you take so long?"

He held her close, kissing her forehead, trying to give her the strength she needed to see Dawson.

"Baby, I'm here now, don't worry...He won't do anything...and I still owe him a black eye..." 

His words made her laugh, while she kept her face buried in his neck. 

"Pacey, promise me you won't pay him back today, I don't wanna ruin Thanksgiving."

"I promise to keep my hand far from his face if he behaves, but one harsh word he says to you and I'll do what he deserves."

"Fine. Let's go inside, it's freezing here." She smiled.

"I know a better way to warm you." He whispered.

"Really? Which way?" She teased.

"This one" His mouth was over hers, in a kiss. She parted her lips to accept his tongue, hungry to taste him, her arms snaking around his neck, like they had a will of their own, his arms around her waist bringing her closer, molding her forms to his. They broke the passionate kiss, when they heard laughter behind them. And all their friends talking together, from the window.

"What did I say? Public displays of affection".

"We should've brought cold water to tear them apart." Jack joked.

"Come on, Witter, the girl needs to breathe..." 

"Bunny, we know he is hot but can't you keep your hands off him?"

They burst in laughter along them, and joined them inside.

When the Leerys arrived, Grams was helping Bodie and Bessie with the dinner, Alex was playing near the young adults, absorbed with his toy cars. Joey was comfortably settled on Pacey's lap; Audrey and Jack were teasing them. Jen was sat on the floor and Charlie on a chair behind her, with his guitar.

"Bunny, why don't you sing? I'm getting bored"

"I'm busy, right now" Joey answered kissing Pacey's face.

"Oh, that's nauseating...and I thought you were bad in high school..."

"Weren't they that bad?"

"C'mon, Charlie, you are my friend, and I don't say a word about you and Jen."

"That's because we don't burn our friends' eyes mauling each other in public..."

"What can I say, guys? The girl can't resist my charming self"

"Pacey, darling, keep your mouth shut."

"It's an order, baby." He kisses her.

Dawson watched them from the door, where Bessie was greeting him. He felt nearly sick seeing everybody looking so good without him, like he wasn't even missed. He dropped his head, trying to hide the jealousy, the anger and the bitterness he was feeling. He saw his parents going to greet his friends, but he couldn't take himself there. He answered the most polite way he could to Grams and Bessie's questions about LA.

"Joey, darling, you look so good...you too, Pacey"

"Thanks, Gale. How is Lily?" she smiled, not bothering to get off her place.

"She's cranky today" Mitch answered. "Dawson, aren't you coming to say hello to your friends?"

Dawson approached them, trying to hold back his need to snap that cocky smile from Pacey's face. How could Joey stay like that, on his lap, while he held her possessively? He had no right to do that.

"Hi, guys." He managed to say.

The cold reception Dawson got, since they ignored the events from Halloween surprised everybody. Feeling the air filled with tension, Bessie announced the dinner was served. The dinner went by with no big deal. After dessert, Joey went outside with Pacey; she was so tired of looking at Dawson, who was acting like nothing had happened.  Pacey just held her, to protect her from the cold, his hands stroking her hair. Dawson went after them; he had to talk to Joey.

"I'd like to talk to you, Joey."

"Really, Dawson? Because I don't wanna talk to you right now." He heard her cold answer.

"Joey, please." He whined.

"If you wanna talk to me, say it now. You have five minutes."

"Alone, Joey."

"Dawson, anything you want to tell me, Pacey can hear."

"Joey, how can you do this to me? Haven't you punished me yet?"

"Punish you? Dawson, what do you mean?" she stepped out Pacey's arms.

Pacey was trying his best too control himself from making Dawson shut his big mouth up.

"Joey, you are doing all this to punish me, this thing with Pacey, because I pushed you away..."

"Dawson, have you even heard what you said? It's been two years, two damn years!" Her voice louder.

"Joey, I know I hurt you..." He stepped closer.

"Dawson Leery, is this big head of yours only for growing hair? You have to give me some credit here; do you really think I would be with Pacey just because you hurt me two years ago?"

"Joey, I'm willing to do anything you want me to, I'm going to drop out school just to be near you..."

"Are you on drugs or something? I don't wanna be with you."

"Joey, please, you have to listen to me, the only thing he wants from you is sex… I love you, you're my soul mate, and you're supposed to be with me..." He grabbed her arms.

"Dawson, are you deaf? Haven't you heard what Joey said? Let her go."

"Pacey, this conversation hasn't reached the scum yet." He tightened his grip, while she struggled to break free.

"Now it has." Pacey flew over Dawson, punching him. Joey screamed, crying, as they continued fighting, her voice attracting everyone to outside. Mitch and Bodie stopped the fight, holding the guys.

"Can you two please explain what the hell you were doing? Fighting like two kids?" Mitch shouted.

"Your son was hurting my girlfriend, what do you expect me to do?" Pacey asked, full of anger.

"Dawson, explain yourself"

"I was just talking to Joey, if Pacey has a problem with that..."

"Shut up, Dawson. I owed you a black eye since Halloween."

"Halloween? Dawson was in LA in Halloween." Gale said, confused.

"No, Gale, he wasn't." Joey told her, a strange calm filling her. "He went to Boston with this very same talk that I must be with him. Bodie, free Pacey, he won't do anything"

She grabbed Pacey's hand and turned to Dawson who was still being held by his father, lifting her chin, eyes full of tears.

"Look, Dawson, I thought I'd never say this. You are not my friend anymore; you haven't been in a long, long time. I chose be with Pacey because I love him, and if you could see the wonderful man your former best friend, you brother, like you used to call him, grew up to be, you would stop being this childish self centered creature you've become this past years. I won't lose touch with your family, because I love Gale and Mitch like they were my own blood, but I never, never want you to be near me or Pacey. You've hurt us more than you can imagine, I know you somehow got rid of Pacey's letter, I remember you leaving me here alone, passed out when I lost my baby, if it weren't for Jen, I could've died." Sighs of surprise were heard, nobody beside her knew that. "I remember every word you said to me and him. Please, go back to LA and forget you ever met us." Pacey remained in silence, knowing she had to say everything that was going on her mind.

"You don't mean it, Joey. I made you a favor when I took that letter. You will ask me to come back when he dumps you for the first slut he finds."

"Mitch, Gale, I'm sorry you had to find out what kind of person your son is like this. And Dawson, I'm serious, forget you ever met me."

"This is not over, Joey." He yelled while his father dragged him to the car, followed by a crying Gale, holding a frightened Lily.

"Yes, it is." She whispered, hiding her face on Pacey's chest, finally giving in to her tears.


	21. Don't you ever get tired of talking?

And a double update for who patiently waited.

After a long time crying with her face buried on Pacey's chest, Joey finally calmed down. Bess and Bodie had gone inside and their friends headed back to Grams', including Audrey, who claimed she needed to talk to Jen about a guy, in a no subtle way to leave the drama past her. She looked to her boyfriend through tears, as he just looked at her, worried. She noticed he had a cut over his left brow, she touched it very carefully. 

"You have to take care of this." She whispered her voice still shaky with tears.

"Are you ok, Jo?" He asked on the same soft tone you would se to a child.

"Yep, I'm fine. Let's get you cleaned." She grabbed his hand, taking him to her bedroom, ignoring Bessie's gaze.

She made him sit on her bed, while she went pick up the first-aid kit she knew Bessie had.

"Joey, what are you doing?" Her sister asked.

"Taking care of my boyfriend." She answered.

"Jo, what was all that about?"

"Bess, not now, please." She begged. "Tomorrow I'll tell you, ok? Now, I just want to be sure he's ok and sleep."

"Joey.."

"Bess, he's sleeping here tonight. I need this. Trust me, nothing will happen."

Bessie wanted to say no, but she knew it was not only about being with Pacey, she needed him to make her forget she had closed her life for the person who had been her best friend all life.

"Ok, but leave the door open." Bessie agreed.

Joey rolled her eyes…the last thing she had on her mind right now was sex…well, since it was Pacey they were talking about, maybe not so the last thing…She left Bess, smiling, and went back to her room, soundly closing it.

"Ouch, Jo, this hurts!" Pacey complained to his girlfriend who was trying to clean the cut he had near his left brow.  

"You're such a whiner, Witter." She mocked.

"I'm in pain here; you could at least be kind to me…" He pouted.

"Want me to kiss it better?" She leaned over, kissing his forehead.

"There are other parts of me hurting a lot, Potter" He winked maliciously.

"I should be mad at the way you handled things." She said matter-of-factly, making him look at her confused. 

"Joey, what did you want me to do? Let Dawson hurt you?" 

"Pacey, he already hurt me when he kissed me in prom. When he took that letter. When he left me here, calling me stupid because I got pregnant." She kneeled beside him, getting his hands in hers, unshed tears in her eyes. "Any physical harm he could do weren't even near to what those did. I lost you for what seemed forever." He smiled, his hand placing one loose strand of hair behind her ear, caressing softly her cheek. "He threatened us, he hurt you. And when you hurt, I hurt too"

"I must look terrible...for you to be saying such things." He stated, his eyes shinning. He could never get tired of those little declarations of love that she'd grown fonder since they got back.

"He looks much worse, sweetheart. Anyway, I want to thank you."

"Thank me? For beating Dawson?"

"No, for being there, being you, taking care of me." She said, with love in her eyes.

He pulled her up, making Joey join him on the bed. He kissed her forehead, and teased her.

"I always knew you had this thing for rough guys…"

"That's enough, Mr. Hero complex." He tickled her. "Ok I admit it, maybe I have something for rough guys…" She retorted, smiling. He kissed her fully on the lips, letting his tongue slip between them, tasting her, that sweet taste that was uniquely hers. She ran her fingers over his hair, deepening the kiss. They ended up falling on the bed, still kissing. He broke the kiss, breathing heavily.

 "Jo, we shouldn't…" He mumbled through kisses.

"Why not?" She looked at him through heavy lidded eyes full of desire.

"Joey…since we got back together we've been thinking too much about sex..." He sat back, while she laid there, her eyes trying to find some reason.

"You're worried about what Dawson said…that you are with me only for sex…" 

"Jo, I…"

"Pacey, I know that we're not only about sex. You wouldn't last nine months waiting for me to be ready… and now you are the one who is always stopping me and I know that even on our almost situations nothing would happen, cause something is keeping you from do it. What are you afraid of?"

"I'm afraid of losing you all over again, sex tore us apart last time." He did it; he put his fears in words.

"No, Pace, sex didn't tear us apart. My lies did it." She replied, sitting in front of him.

 "Jo, what about Bessie? We're under her roof; I don't wanna get you in trouble." He tried to say, fighting temptation; her hands were working on his shirt's buttons.

"I'll deal with Bess tomorrow. Tonight I want to forget, I want you to make me forget everything but you." 

"So, this is about making you forget about Dawson and the fight…"He tried not to show he was a little bit hurt by her words.

"No, Pacey, this is about you. It's about how you look at me, even when you think I don't notice. It's about the way you try to take care of me, no matter what. It's about the way you make my heart beat fast with just one touch." She took his shirt off, followed by the wife beater he always used. He swallowed the lump on his throat; this looked so much like their first time. "It's about all the little things that define us. It's about you finally forgiving me." She was kissing his shoulders, her tongue teasing the pulse on his neck.

"I forgave you a long time ago, Jo." He uttered, trying to ignore that the blood on his veins was reaching boiling temperature.

"I wanna feel forgiven, Pace." She kissed him, and took of her own shirt, standing in front of him on her bra.

"Joey...Bessie is gonna kill me." He was giving in, his mouth touching her face with sweet kisses.

"Pacey, don't you ever get tried of talking? Cause I get tired of talking…" And she kissed him again, making him forget about everything else but her.


	22. Kidnapping

I know it took me more than usua to update this...I'm really sorry for the long delay, k?

**Part 22 - The kidnapping**

The Leerys got back home in silence. Mitch couldn't believe in his own son. He had acted like some kind of lunatic; his obsession with Joey was getting to the point of sickness. Dawson tried to get to the stairs to his bedroom, but was stopped by his father.

"Not so fast, mister. Gale, put Lilly to sleep and come back, we're going to have a nice talk here."

"But Dad…" Dawson whined.

"No buts, Dawson."

Gale stared at her husband surprised. Their son, their baby had been beaten, and Mitch was going to give him a hard time, she just knew it.

They waited for Gale in silence, Dawson wondering what he had gotten himself into. When his mother came back, she sat right in front of him, her eyes trying to comfort him. Mitch sat on the other couch and asked in the most civil way.

"Now, Dawson, can you explain what the hell was that?"

"Pacey got jealous of Joey and overreacted…"

"Cut the bullshit, Dawson…I know you came to Boston a few weeks ago, you paid the tickets with your credit card, you thought I wouldn't notice?" Mitch asked in an angry tone

"I came to see Joey, she invited me…" He mumbled.

"I didn't raise a child to become a liar, Dawson. Joey didn't seem to be very happy to see you…"

"Dad, she believes in Pacey's lies…"

"Maybe he's right, Mitch, we can't be against our own son…" Gale tried to defend him.

"Gale, we both spoiled this boy a little too much…You're obsessed, son…Joey doesn't want you, she made it pretty clear tonight. You just embarrassed yourself."

"I have to come back, dad, I have to be near her…"

"No, you don't. You're going back to California first thing in the morning and go back to school, I'm taking you credit card back, the only money you will have is enough for you to do the basics…"

Gale started crying, he was being to harsh on Dawson.

"Mitch…"

"No, Gale, he's gonna learn to value the right things in life, by the hardest way. Dawson, go to your room and start packing."

"I hate you, Dad." Dawson yelled like a 5 year old.

"You can hate me, but I'm still the one who pays your bills. Go"

Dawson went up, slamming his door. Gale kept sat, crying. Mitch sat beside her, one arm around her shoulder.

"Gale, sweetie, this is hurting me more that you, believe me." He kissed her forehead.

"Oh, Mitch, you were too hard with him" She said between sobs.

"Only for his own good…" They sat in silence, both worried about their son.

At Mrs. Ryan's house, the gang was sat in front of the fireplace talking, too surprised with the previous events.

"I will never say again that I'm bored near you guys." Audrey exclaimed.

"The eternal triangle now has more dramatic tones than never." Jack said.

"What do you think it's gonna happen now, Jack?" Jen asked, feeling safe with Charlie's arms around her.

"No idea." He shrugged.

"This Dawson guy looks a little bit obsessed to me." Charlie pointed. "He may cause trouble."

"More, darling?" Jen kissed his cheek.

"I wonder what Joey and Pacey are doing right now…She looked so sad." Audrey talked thoughtfully.

At Joey's room, she and Pacey were making out like crazy on her bed, half clothed, hands touching everyplace, they couldn't let go of each other. Pacey was over her, pressing his body against hers on the soft mattress. He stopped to breathe for a while, looking into her eyes that were shining with desire.

"Since when you became so crazy?" He whispered huskily.

"Since I fell in love with you." He nibbled her earlobe, sucking it, making her moan out loud. He stood up and started picking up the clothes they had thrown up through the bedroom. Joey sat on the bed, confused.

"Pace? You should be taking my clothes off, not putting them on." She said in a not so happy tone, when he started dressing her.

"Where's your bag? Here, I found it." He started putting everything she had inside it and then dressed himself.

"Pacey Witter, do you care to explain what you are doing?"

"If I'm going to have trouble with Bessie, than I'm gonna to do it right." He picked her bag and grabbed her b the hand. "Come, Jo."

"What are you doing?" She was laughing now.

"I'm kidnapping you. You clearly can't do this quiet enough, and damn, I don't wanna you quiet while we make love, so, I'm kidnapping you."

They left the house as quiet as they could, because Joey couldn't stop laughing. They got inside Pacey's car and she asked him.

"So, what now, Mr. Kidnapper?"

"Boston, we're going back to Boston." He kissed her and started the engine.


	23. The end of the curse

**Note:** this chapter is R for sexual content!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own them, just my computer and my poor brain

The half light of dawn was starting to show when they arrived in Boston. They entered the apartment hand in hand, in silence; there was no urgency or hurry anymore. Pacey left her bag on the floor and took her in his arms, smiling.

"Tired?" The question was clear in his eyes.

"Not that much." She smiled back kissing him. It was a soft kiss, but the need they felt for each other, turned it into pure passion. She opened her mouth to his tongue assault, letting him taste her till they were both breathless. His arms were pulling her as close as possible, as their breaths mingled in that kiss.

"Jo, Jo" He whispered between kisses, her name like a prayer on his lips. He took her in his arms, carrying her to his bedroom, carefully laying her on his bed. She just stared at him, love, passion, desire, lust, all written in her features, her brown hair all around her face. He sits on the bed, just looking at her, lovingly.

"Are you going just to look, Witter?" She teased.

"First I have to tell you few things, Jo." He took her hand, kissing her knuckles. "I want you to know that I really forgave you, the only reason I stopped things till now, besides some moments of bad timing from our dearest friends, was because every relationship I had up today has turned down after sex and I can't bear losing you again. You are everything to me; these past months without you, were killing me, even if I never admitted it. When I was at the sea, every night I remembered our nights on True love, and made me feel even worse. And that's why I got involved with Erin, to try to ease the pain, but it only made it more difficult. But I want you to know that I couldn't sleep with her, I felt if I did so, I would be betraying you." She smiled. "And to finish this rambling, I love you, Potter, and I'm gonna prove it to you every single moment from now on."

"You don't have to prove me, Pace. I just want you to love me." She had tears of happiness in her eyes.

"You wouldn't have to ask that, Jo." He made her stand up; they were both in front of each other, their gaze locked. They stripped their own clothes, never losing visual contact, just smiling. Joey laid back on the bed and he joined, both naked, in need of feel each other's skin. He looked at her, feeling his heart beating faster at the sight of her beauty just waiting for him.

"Hey." She whispered.

His answer was lower his head and kiss her slowly. She threw her arms around his neck, bringing him closer, opening her mouth to accept his tongue, reveling in the feel of him, the taste of him. He sucked her lower lip, nibbling it, and left her mouth to shower her face with soft kisses, letting his tongue trace her ear shell, sucking and biting softly the lobe, causing her to moan in pleasure. His hands traced gently her ribcage until he reached her breasts, cupping them, pinching the nipples, bringing a jolt of electricity running through her body. His mouth kept its way downwards, kissing her neck, one shoulder than the other, as she breathed through open lips, fighting for air. Joey let her hands go off his hair to caress his neck, making him shiver, his shoulders, one finger tracing the contours of his body, reaching his aching erection, she just runs her finger on him, making him groan and press himself on her. She slowly takes him in her hand, stroking him, and feeling him getting harder under her touch, until he stops her.

"Jo, I won't last much if you keep doing that." His voice was a mixture of pleasure and pain. She stopped, taking his face on her hands, locking her mouth on his, trying to show him all the passion she felt with one kiss. He continued kneading her breasts, teasing her, and turned again his attention to them with his mouth, licking her nipples, nipping them and sucking her breasts, in a sweet torture, her breath becoming more ragged and her moans of pleasure louder. It's his turn to bring his hand to trace her belly, her navel, then to her thigh, making her growl in frustration.

"What's wrong, baby?" He chuckles and she simply glared at him. He slips his fingers between her legs, feeling the dampness of her arousal, putting two fingers inside of her, while his thumb teased her clit, making her hips lift off the mattress, gasping. She closed her eyes, when he started placing open mouth kisses along her body, with his hand still working on her, he kissed her thighs, and she held her breath in anticipation knowing what was coming next. He smiled, and finally let his mouth join his fingers, tasting her, licking and sucking, her breath shorter, and the moans uncontrollably leaving her mouth, up to the point she was unable to hold the tension anymore, as her orgasm washed over her body, his name cried out loud. He looked into the night stand, finding what he needed, and put on the condom, and positioned himself at her entrance. He kissed her, the taste of herself on his lips arousing her in the most sensual way, as he slowly entered her. He kept still for a moment, just enjoying the feeling of being inside her again. She sighed; something that sounded like I love you left her lips and the stillness became unbearable. He starts to thrust into her as slow as he could; he wanted this to last forever, just this feeling of warmness surrounding him. She brought her legs around his waist, needing to feel him even closer, as their mouths encountered in heated kisses, their bodies moving in perfect synchrony, the pace becoming faster as they felt the need to release more urgent. He felt her walls closing around him as she came again, his name the only intelligible thing she could form, her pleasure triggering his own release. He remained over her for a moment, kissing her face, her neck, murmuring 'I love yous'. Joey kept her eyes shut, her breath still labored, like she couldn't recover. He left her fro a moment, to dispose of the used condom and got back to bed, bringing a still silent Joey closer to him. She just snuggled up, letting her head rest on his chest. Pacey started to get worried about her apparently lost of words.

"Jo, are you ok?" He lifted her chin to face her, who still had her eyes closed.

"I think I just forgot how to speak" She mumbled.

He grinned, kissing her forehead, his arms tightening around her.

"So I guess this is better than nice, huh?" He couldn't help the teasing.

She opened her eyes, losing herself in the depths of his blue ones, smiling and kissing his shoulder.

"Much better than nice." She started laughing.

"Jo, it's not nice to laugh after mind numbing sex with your boyfriend, you know?"

"It's just that we finally did it." She replied, kissing him.

"It's still not a reason to laugh."

"I'm so happy that I could go dancing naked on the streets."

"Although I find your naked self a pretty sight, I think I will keep you right here."

"Jealous."

"Not jealous, just careful. I love you, Jo." He kissed her.

"Love you too, Pace."

They stayed in silence, soft kisses once in a while, his hands stroking her hair, until both drifted off to sleep.


	24. Sweet Nothings

Pacey woke up with the scent of coffee filling his nostrils. He got out the bed, putting his boxers on and followed the scent. He leaned against the kitchen's doorframe, smiling at the sight of Joey wearing one of his shirts, concentrated on preparing breakfast. He walked to her, putting his arms around her waist, and kissing her neck.

"Hey, you left me alone."

She turned to kiss him quickly with a smile, and her attention was back to the pancakes. He rested his chin on her shoulder while she put one on the plate.

"You were tired, Pace. And I owed you a breakfast"

"All I need for breakfast is right here." He replied, showering kisses on her neck, tightening his arms around her.

Joey turned around in his arms to kiss him; soon, the world was forgotten as their mouths found each other. Pacey lifted her, making her sit on the counter, placing himself between her legs, pressing his body against hers, their hands trying to bring each other as close as they could. Until the smell of burnt food filled the air.

"Oh, God, Pacey, my pancakes!" She climbed off the counter to face her ruined pancake.

They burst into laughter, kissing one more time before cleaning up the mess. They took their breakfast to the living room, eating while watching cartons on TV, sat on the floor, using the coffee table as an actual table.

"What are your plans for today, Josephine?" He asked, his mouth full of pancakes, ignoring his girlfriend's glare.

"I don't know…" She shrugged. "Maybe study, you know, finals are in two weeks." Her lopsided smile planted on her face.

He took her hand in his, kissing her knuckles and nipping her fingers.

"I know the kind of study you want, Potter…" He teased.

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do."

"Pace, why are you arguing with me? You know I always win…"

He pulled her closer, tickling her.

"Who wins, Jo?" Both laughing at their childish manners.

"I win," She answered, bringing his face closer so she could kiss him. He fell over her, pinning her on the floor, his mouth demanding, hands searching for the soft skin under the shirt.

"You cheated." He accused, breathless. Joey started kissing his neck, her hands caressing his shoulders. "Jo, I'm still hungry, you know?"

"So am I" She made him stand up, grabbing his hand and taking him back to his room.

Sunday morning came too fast for the couple; they had spent the last two days in the apartment making up for all time lost. Pacey tried to focus on whoever was calling him at that ungodly hour, his eyes groggily wandering of the standing form of Joey...

"Pacey, come on, wake up!" she was shaking him.

"Jo? What are you doing up? It's Sunday morning." He mumbled, covering his head with the comforter, just to have it thrown on the other side of the bedroom...

"Pace, we're going out." She stated.

He pulled her to the bed, making her fall beside him.

"Why do we need to go out? All we need is here." He leaned down to kiss her, but she turned her face, and the kiss reached her cheek.

"Don't even try to kiss me, morning breath monster."

"Last night I was your teddy bear, now I am morning breath monster?" He asked, continuing to kiss wherever he had easy access, earning a kiss as answer.

"Please, Pacey, tell me you're not bored of being locked here."

"Not at all." He was trying to get her shirt off now.

"Pacey, I'm serious. Go take a shower and we'll go out, have lunch at a nice place, then we can go back to our favorite activity."

"Come to the shower with me." He begged with his best puppy dog eyes.

"Pace, the eyes are not going to work now. I already showered, knowing that you would try that."

"Please, Potter, you know you like that."

"You used that trick yesterday, I'm not falling again."

"Then I'm not going out. I'll just stay here." He turned around.

"Teddy?" She pouted.

"No."

"Teddy?" She tried again, kissing his neck.

"You know I can't resist when you do that…Fine, I'm going." He left the bed.

She laughed while he stood up to head to the bathroom.

"I have another reason for you to hurry. We have to buy more condoms."

"But we had what twelve of them." He said, surprised.

"Pace, that was Friday morning. Today is Sunday. Do the math."

"Now we're going out." He ran to the bathroom.

After making Pacey get out of bed, they had breakfast and were just walking around the town. They went to a bookstore, where they laughed after looking at an old exemplar of the Karma Sutra, which Pacey said he wanted as a Christmas gift, just to practice with her. They walked around the marina, watching the boats, wishing they still had True Love. And now, despite the cold, they were walking on the park, hand in hand, just enjoying each other's company.

"Why do we have to walk this much, Jo?" He whined, nuzzling her neck.

"Pacey, I just wanna enjoy the day."

"It's cold, Jo. We could be enjoying the day at home, warm and cozy and…"

She glared at him, trying to hold back her smile.

"Pacey, you could make good use of some exercise."

"Are insinuating that I'm fat?" He asked, bringing her to his arms.

"Well, few pounds less won't kill you…" she shrugged.

"So you're saying I'm fat. Do you have any idea of the damage you're causing to my self steam right now?"

"I'm kidding, silly, I like you this way…and what would be of a teddy bear without some stuff here?" she pinched his side to prove her point.

"And my naïve self thinking this new teddy thing was an endearment…"

"Of course it is, sweetheart. You're my private teddy bear; I won't share you with anyone." She kissed him.

"I like you being possessive." He told her, kissing her again.

"Pace, do you remember when we were kids? I never let you get close to my toys…"

"Just because you knew I would hide them from you" He kissed the tip of her nose.

"I hated you so much then…"

"No, you didn't, you loved me."

"Pacey, I hated you…"

"No, you used to hide your overwhelming love for me with hate."

"You're so cute when you're delusional" She rested her face on his shoulder.

"No, baby, listen to me. You hated Tamara; you didn't like Andie…you freaked out when you knew about my sex pact with Jen."

"And that was all to hide my love for you?" She asked with a knowing look. "And me dating other guys? Or being love with Dawson?"

"Just to protect yourself, because you were so afraid of your feelings for me…" He explained grinning.

"I need to call Andie right now and ask for her therapist's number…my poor darling."

"Hey, you were the one in love with Dawson."

"Maybe we should both go to therapy then." Joey smirked, kissing him.

"Jo, let's go back, please?" he nipped her earlobe.

"Nope."

"Please, I'll even cook for you…" Pacey kissed her neck.

"That would work…" She kissed his chin. "But I'm bored to be at home all time…"

"Bored? That's not really nice since you spent all time with me…and I was thinking you were having fun…" He pretended to look hurt.

"I'm not bored about having sex with you, Pace." She explained, worried that he had taken it seriously.

"I was starting to think you are a great actress…" He was laughing now.

"Jerk! I thought that I had hurt you." she smacked his chest

"Jo, I know that you're not bored about sex, I just wanna go back home to resume our activities"

"Perv."

"Am I the perv, Josephine? Who ravished me in the bathroom yesterday while I was peacefully taking a shower?"

"That would be me…" she answered blushing, with a shy smile, but her eyes shining with the memory.

Pacey sat under a tree, leaning against it, with Joey between his legs, resting her body against his, a happy smile dancing on her face, his arms around her waist.

"I never saw you look so beautiful." He whispered in her ear.  
Joey craned her neck to face him, not resisting to the need to kiss him.

"You say that because you love me"

"That I really do." He kissed her neck, sucking the soft skin there, making her shiver and let out a soft moan, causing him to chuckle against her skin. "You sound like a kitten when you do that…"

"Pacey, you're not calling me kitten…" Joey told him with a warning tone.

"Why not, kitten?" It was like she asked to be called like that.

"It's too cheesy and corny and…"

"If you can call me teddy, I can call you kitten." He pinched her cheek to make her understand his point.

"Fair enough. I'm so happy that it doesn't matter." She bit her lower lip, thoughtfully. "I wanted to go out today, Pace, because I'm too happy to be confined to a small apartment. I wanna show everybody how happy I am, how happy you make me."

"Jo, that was way too sappy." He was grinning like a Cheshire cat.

"Pacey, I'm a girl; I'm allowed to be sappy. And look who's talking, you cried watching The Lion King, a cartoon."

"For starts, it's not a cartoon, it's an animated movie. And it's really sad when Simba's dad dies." He explained, making her laugh.

"You know what fascinates me most? The way you can be so grown up when we're around a serious subject and the other moment you are this amazing kid, who can cry over a movie, or fight over the remote control or simply make me smile with a goofy face." He played with a strand of her hair, his yes lost in hers as she kept talking. "You are the only person who made me finally live like a teenager; I was so uptight, overachieving, living by other people's judgments that I was turned on adult mode full time and you made me see I was still a kid. And you never judge me, you just let me do what I feel, and I know if I take the wrong step you'll be there so I won't fall. And these are the little things that make me fall in love with you all over again each time I see you." He tried to swallow the lump in his throat, damn, he was almost crying like a girl after her words.

"And when you say things like that, Potter, I feel butterflies in my stomach, my throat gets dry and I know I'm falling in love with you all over again." He kissed her forehead.

"We're both too sappy." She stated chuckling.

"So, what do you say we take our little sappy mutual admiration society on the road and get back home where you can show each other how much we are in love and before any of our friends show up to interrupt us?"

She got up, followed by him, smiling as he held her hand tight after kissing her.

"I knew that this whole thing would end with you trying to get into my pants."

"I do what I can." He shrugged.

"For your luck, I want you to get into my pants as badly as you." She told him.

"And what are we waiting for, kitten?" He ignored her glare, as he dragged her back to the apartment.


	25. Cheated and Jealous

Audrey entered the room, noticing that Joey was putting some clothes in a bag; she would probably spend the night at Pacey's again. Since Thanksgiving they would be like that, sleeping together almost every night. She sighed, wishing she could tell Joey what was going on with her life right now, but she was afraid she wouldn't understand her.

"Going to sleep over Pacey's again, Bunny?"

"Yep, my last final is in two days, but he has Calculus final tomorrow and he hates everything related to Math, so he asked me to help him to study." She answered with a smile.

"Mmmhhmmm. Study? Math? I bet he has Applied Anatomy on his mind, not Math." Audrey joked, ducking to avoid the pillow Joey threw at her. Her face fell for a moment; she envied what her friend had with Pacey. Joey sensed there was something wrong with Audrey, but whenever she asked her, the usual answer would be fine, I'm fine. She shrugged imperceptibly. If Audrey wasn't ready to tell her, she was going to wait till she came around.

"Aud, I'm going, enjoy the silent room and try to get some study. See you tomorrow." Joey told her from the door.

Audrey plopped her self on her bed, staring the ceiling. Joey was a good friend, but would she be able to forgive her about what she had been doing?

Jen and Jack were trying to study for their finals, but their minds were completely spaced out, they couldn't concentrate. Jen closed her book with a loud thud.

"I can't do this anymore, Jack! Why did I come to college?"

"To party?" Jack laughed; he was as bored as she was.

"Yeah, maybe." She had a pout face. "But right now, I'm tired of everything, of studying, of Charlie, especially of Charlie."

"What has Mr. Guitar man made now?" He asked, knowing that these past weeks she always had something to complain about him.

"I don't know, Jack. He's been distant; he seems he doesn't care anymore. I know I'm not in love with him, not like our lovey dovey friends that barely leave the room, but I like him, he's the first guy I like since Harry, and it hurts me…"

"I don't know, Jen, I'm not the best advisor in the relationship department." Jack sighed. "I'm nothing more than Rick's sex buddy that answers his bootie calls."

"You should turn straight, Jack. All our problems would be solved."

They both laughed at Jen's statement.

"We both suck, Grace."

"I totally agree, Will."

They heard a loud moan coming from Pacey's room, making them groan disgusted.

"I can't believe they're at it again." Jen exclaimed.

"Time for a coffee…somewhere far from here." Jack replied, grabbing Jen's hand taking her outside, both laughing.

"God, Jo, yes, right there." Pacey moaned loudly again.

"Stop it, Witter!" She smacked the back of his head.

"Ouch, Potter, that hurts!" He turned his head to see her. He was lying on his stomach, while Joey was comfortably sat on his butt, giving him a massage.

"It will hurt even more if you don't stop this. Did you forget that Jen and Jack are trying to study in the next door? Or should I remind that you have to study too?"

He grinned, rolling his body beneath her, so she was now straddling him.

"I already studied, I'm tired." He smoothed her bare thighs with his hands, making her quiver. "Now, I can have my wicked way with you." He winked.

"No, Pacey! You know the deal. No study, no sex." She leaned in to kiss him, letting her lips linger on his face.

"Joey, just a quickie…" His hands were now caressing her waist inside her shirt, better put, his shirt.

"Nope. Not until you finish this chapter."

"Dictator!" He mumbled.

"Lazy!" she poked out her tongue.

"How many times do I have to tell you to not show me your tongue unless you're planning on using it?"

"But I'm planning, Pace…after you finish this."

"Fine, fine. But could you just gimme a hint on what you're planning?"

Joey leaned again, whispering something in his ear. Pacey flipped them over, throwing his book across the room, making her laugh.

"And do you expect me to concentrate after saying that? Now it's time to teach you a lesson." He tickled her merciless.

"Stop, Pacey, please!" She was laughing uncontrollably.

"It will be a pleasure." He whispered, his mouth holding hers captive.

Audrey paced around her room, trying to figure out what to do, when she heard a knock. She opened it, to find Charlie smiling at her. She jumped into his arms kissing him. Tomorrow, tomorrow she would think about it.

Dawson was on his seat on the plane back home wondering what he would tell his family after flunking all his exams. He chuckled to himself, not even Pacey on his worst days could do that, so that could be seen as quite an accomplishment. But he had found better things to do, wild parties in LA where you could do anything and take anything your heart desires. Just to take his mind of Joey…maybe she would like him better now, if she wanted a bad boy, well, she couldn't find one better than him. It would be a surprise for little Ms. Josephine Potter, he thought, closing his eyes to take a nap during the long hours of flight.

Jen tried to concentrate again on the paper she was doing, while Jack was busy talking on the telephone to Rick. Although he said he was ok with the no commitment thing he had with Rick, she knew him better. He was falling more and more each day for him and there was nothing she could do about it. But who was she to talk? Her very own boyfriend hadn't been a model lately, but she didn't want to let him go, that would be recognizing that she had failed again on the relationship department. She felt something was really wrong, and she wanted someone to talk, but all her friends were so wrapped up in their own problems or lack of, talking about Pacey and Joey, that she didn't want to bother them with her problems. She sighed heavily, getting back to her paper. Soon, the finals would be over and maybe things would be back to normal too.

Joey got back to her dorm room, happy that she had just taken her last final, and she felt she could expect at least a B+ on it. She laughed; Pacey would say she was being way too modest. She opened the door and stopped, shocked with what she saw: Audrey and Charlie making out on her bed.  
"Audrey! Charlie! What the hell do you think you're doing?"  
The couple broke the kiss and sat on the bed, both embarrassed and started to talk together.

"Joey, it's not what you are thinking."

"C'mom, Charlie, your tongue was down her throat."

"Joey I wanted to tell you…"

"Audrey, it's not me you both owe an explanation, it's Jen. I'm really disappointed with both of you. Jen has been nothing but nice to you Audrey and a good girlfriend to you, Charlie, so what's the excuse?"

"Things just happened, Joey, we didn't plan this." Charlie tried to explain.

"But you guys could be honest. You could break up with Jen and then hook up with Audrey."

"You are not telling her, are you?" He asked dropping his eyes to the floor.

"I don't know, right now, the only thing I wanna do is not look at your faces." She turned back to the door, leaving the room.

"What are we gonna do now, Audrey?"

"I don't know, Charlie, I don't know."

Joey walked out the room feeling dirty with she just saw. How couldn't she notice what was going on her room? A wave of guilty washed over her, she had been so wrapped up in Pacey lately that she barely paid attention to her friends, and right now she was feeling such a lousy friend. She ran her fingers through her hair. Should she tell Jen? Or let things just happen? Jen had become her best girl friend and she couldn't find an attractive alternative where she could be less hurt about Charlie's behavior. She felt a sudden need to talk to Pacey; she called his cell phone but it was off. She remembered he told her he would be studying at BU's library this afternoon before going to work, so maybe she could just go there and talk to him or just be hold by him in his arms while she made a decision.

She got to the library, her eyes scanning the tables and desks looking for her boyfriend when she saw him laughing with someone. Although there were more people on the table, the only person she could see was the brunette sat beside him, laughing too, her green eyes shining. Joey felt her stomach turning sick when she recognized the girl as Erin.  
For a moment she hesitated, but she approached the table, where Pacey continued to talk, his hands complementing his voice, oblivious to her presence, which annoyed her even more. She saw Erin whispering something to him and he turned his head to her direction, looking at her with a grin. He left the table, not noticing how disturbed she looked.

"Hi, Jo, what are you doing here?" He leaned to kiss her, but she turned her face, confusing him.

"What am I doing here? What is she doing here?" Joey pointed to Erin with her eyes.

Pacey breathed heavily, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Jo, Erin studies here at BU, she's in most of my classes, you know that." He tried to reach her but she started walking out of the library and he followed, getting mad at her unjustified behavior. They reached the sidewalk with Joey walking and Pacey following until he made her stop.

"Jo, what's wrong with you?" he asked, holding her arm to make her stop and face him.

"What's wrong with me? First you don't answer your cell phone, second I came here to talk to you just to find you all smitten with your former girlfriend." She burst.

"Smitten? Joey, we were studying in case you haven't noticed I was not alone with her, there were more of my classmates there too. I was at the library, Potter, not at some cheap hotel for goodness' sake. Stop over-reacting."

"I'm over-reacting? No, Pacey, what I see is my boyfriend not telling me he would be studying all afternoon with his ex-girlfriend."

"And because she's my ex-girlfriend I can't be friends with her? Just because you're jealous? I never asked you to stop being friends with Dawson." He was really mad at her now.

"I should have waited for this. I was wondering how long you'd wait to throw Dawson's name in this." She retorted, her voice filled with sarcasm.

"Joey, I'm not throwing Dawson's name in this, I'm just saying you have no reason to be jealous, and I thought it would be pretty much clear by now. But you're acting completely and utterly irrationally."

"Great, now besides of over reacting, I'm irrational."

"Jo, go home, take a deep breath and think about what you're saying…You're sounding like I cheated on you or lied to you."

"No, Pacey Witter is the perfect boyfriend, he never lies."

"Yes, Joey, lying is not my specialty. It's yours." He replied sadly.

The tone on his voice made her stop. What was she doing? She touched his face lightly; regret taking her features mixed with angry about what he said.

"Pace…"

He cupped her face with both hands, looking into her eyes.

"Jo, we're both too nervous now. Go home; calm down and we talk later, ok? Just be sure of one thing: I love you and I would never, ever cheat on you. Don't forget that." He left her, not looking back, leaving Joey wondering about what she had just done.  
Pacey went back to the library, his heart heavy. Something else than seeing Erin studying with him was bothering Joey, he could sense it. All his friends were silent when he sat at the table, wondering what had happened. He grabbed his books, murmuring some lame excuse and left but Erin followed him.

"Pacey, wait." She called him, as he left the building with large steps. He stopped in his tracks, turning around to face her.

"What, Erin?" he asked imaptienly.

"What happened with your girlfriend? She showed up and you weren't the same after."

"She got jealous because you were here too." He explained, not so sure of where came this sudden interest on Joey, but got surprised when Erin started to laugh, making him stare at her quizzically.

"You didn't tell her, did you?" She asked, smiling.

"And should I? You may be my ex- girlfriend, but you are my friend and I don't see a reason for her…"

"To freak out?" She interrupted him. "PJ, she was jealous even when I was your girlfriend."

"But still is not a reason…"

"Pacey, I'm a woman, believe me, I know I'd be jealous if I walked in my boyfriend happily talking to his ex."

"You women were made to drive us men crazy." He sighed.

"Don't tell me you're considering turn gay…" Erin teased, making them both laugh. "If you wanna talk, you know you can come to me, but first, please tell that girlfriend of yours first, cause I don't wanna wake up with a screw driver stuck in my brain."

"She's not that violent. You would get just some bruises." He winked. "After all this heartfelt conversation, I'm sorry, but I really need to go to work and face Ms. Potter's wrath."

"You wanna a ride?"

"Nope, I really don't wanna more trouble that I'm already in, according to you."

"Ok, bye Pacey." Erin left, but turned around to yell at him. "We'll be throwing a party next Friday at my dorm in honor of the last finals, come and bring her, maybe we can even become friends."

"Bye, Erin. I'll think about it. Anyway, hire one or two bodyguards for you, just in case we show up." he joked, heading to his car.

Joey walked back to her dorm, her own harsh words lingering on her mind. Why did she overreact like that? She was pissed off with Audrey and Charlie, not with Pacey. Sure, finding him studying with Erin wasn't one of the most pleasant views, but there was no valid reason to freak out like that. She wandered through the streets, dreading the moment she'd have to face Pacey, she never felt so ashamed about her previous actions. She decided to call in sick for work; she couldn't face him, not now. Memories from all their past fights played over and over in her head while she walked.

_"I'm sad because we haven't talked for three weeks and your first words are about Dawson, as per usual."___

_"The decision of being together or not being together has always been yours."___

_"I'm doing us a favor. Taking both of us home."___

_"Who ya kidding, Jo? Come on. You got off that boat long before the two of us did."___

_"What is that suppose to mean?"___

_"You're a smart girl, Jo. You can figure it out"___

_"When will you see it, Joey? Dawson manipulates you whenever it pleases him and you don't do a thing about it."___

_"When this conversation starts to get emotionally complex, you bail."___

_" Jo, you don't have to do it by yourself. That's why I'm here. I want to be able to help you. I just can't help you if you won't tell me the truth."___

_"Okay, fine, fine, fine, look. Okay, I'll tell you what. Do you want to know what I'm scared of? Cause I'm not scared of whether or not we sleep together. If and when we do decide to do that, it will be right. What I am scared of is that little piece of your heart that will always belong to Dawson Leery. I'm scared of that piece of your heart that always envisioned your first time being with him. I'm scared of that part of you that doesn't want it to be me. That's what I'm scared of."___

_"If that's how you feel… If that's how you feel then… then why did you stay? Why stick around for 9 months if that's what you believe, Pacey?"___

_"I'm just a glutton for punishment I guess."___

_"Let me ask you one question, Jo. What would you say to him? You know, if he were here right now and he asked you, what would you tell him?"___

_"I would have to tell him the truth."___

_"You know, Jo, for the first time in my life, I can't be accused as the one who screwed up everything...you did it. The perfect Miss Josephine Lillian Potter screwed up this relationship in every and each possible way..."___

_"Explain what? I'm not that stupid as you think I am...You treat me like I'm some sort of mental retarded, but I'm much better than this."___

_"Stop these monosyllabically grunts. You know what I mean…you never really believed in us, in our relationship…day after day, you were waiting that I would realize the big mistake I had done and would go back to Dawson…"___

_"And that's exactly what you did…"_

She had been so selfish and stupid, she was never worried about Pacey, all that mattered was herself. She and her stupid fears. Who needed Dawson if she alone could screw up everything? How long would take till Pacey realize what a lame girlfriend she was? She had to make things right somehow and for good. She went back to her dorm, decision taking all her features.

Audrey paced around the room, waiting for Joey to come back. She didn't know what to say, she wanted to ask Joey to give them some time to figure out things before telling Jen. Charlie had left her alone to face Joey, the coward. She heard the doorknob moving, a tired Joey walking in, ignoring her.

"Joey, I have to talk to you."

"Audrey, it's not me you have to talk" Joey replied tiredly.

"Joey, are you telling Jen?" She asked, her voice a little bit shaken.

"Audrey, Jen is one of my best friends; she was there for me every step of the way through one of the most difficult moments in my life, so, forgive me if my loyalty stays with her."

"You are telling her."

"I will, cause she doesn't deserve to be deceived like that, by both of you. But I'm not doing it tonight, so if you or Charlie want to make this right, you have till tomorrow. And now, if you excuse me, I have something to do." Joey said coldly, ignoring the plead in Audrey's eyes, sitting on her desk, writing with no stop.

Next night, Pacey got back home late, everybody seemed to be sleeping at home. He was really worried about Joey, he hadn't seen her or talked to her since the library incident. What was going on with her? Her cell phone seemed dead, all the times he called, he reached only voice mail. He felt something more was wrong, and it wasn't about that stupid fight. The last time she behaved like that was the week before prom…no it couldn't be…they had been careful, she couldn't be pregnant again. A shiver came through his spine as he remembered their shower escapades. He groaned, ok, they hadn't been that careful, but that wasn't a reason for closing him off. He considered even going to her dorm, but when he called, Audrey said she wasn't home. Where could Joey be? He turned his bedroom's light on just to find a sound sleep Joey on his bed. He smiled, although he was a bit mad at her, that was a sight he wanted to see every night when he got home. Her hair was spread over the pillow, a smile dancing on her lips as if her dreams were pleasant and he wondered if he was on them. He changed to his PJs, silent debating with himself if he should or not wake her when he noticed something clutched in her hands. He carefully took it, realizing that was her diary. Pacey felt like a 15 year old, trying to sneak a peek on his girlfriend's diary, but he saw his name written on the last entry and got curious. What was Joey hiding?


	26. The Diary

**Note:** I know, I suck. I have finished this fic a long time ago, in PoTL, and I have no excuses for not ending it here. But eventually, I had to. So, for those who still remembered, I give you the last chapters of Ask me to Stay.

Chapter 26 - The Diary

Pacey sat on the couch, Joey's journal in hand, trying to fight temptation. He remembered when Dawson did that and the consequences of his act weren't pretty. But what harm a peak, just a small one, would do? You would be invading her most private and intimate thoughts an intern voice warned him, but the little devil on his shoulder was quickly winning the battle. You will finally know what she's thinking, that was the seductive and appealing idea. He flipped through the pages, not actually reading, searching for a reason why he shouldn't do that but his curiosity was getting the best of him. I'm only human, he thought. Soon the pro column was much longer than the con. He opened it slowly, carefully, on the last entry, her words entering his mind.

_Guess what? Today I had this stupid fight with Pacey. Not really a fight, more like me bitching him out after seeing him studying with his perfect ex-girlfriend. He was studying and I freaked out. Ok, I can say I was bothered after seeing Audrey making out with Charlie, or sad knowing that my friend Jen is going to get hurt in their mess or that jealousy had the best of me, but the truth is, I made a big, big mess. And funny thing, I really trust Pacey with other women. I can keep trying to find something to justify my behavior, conscious that I have none. There were no valid reasons to bitch him out.___

_The real reason I fought with Pacey…despite the jealousy I feel whenever I see Erin…It's hard to put in words this constant fear I have of losing him, and I guess Erin is like a symbol of how close to that I got. Because when he got tired of my lies, my unjustifiable behavior, it was her he chose to be near him. I know that he already told me that what brought them together was broken hearts by both parts, but that doesn't stop me to think that someday he will want someone like her, not me, this neurotic full of hang ups woman, who once broke his heart. He will prefer a smart, sexy, less complicated one. Just like Erin. I can even hear him saying Potter, you are nuts, no woman can be as smart or sexy as you. But I find that hard to believe, no matter how much times he tells me the opposite.___

_I wonder how much more he will take, how many more times he will forgive my stupidity, how long till he gets tired of his constant cycle I put him through. All I can think is he left once and all I can do is wait for the moment he's going to do it again.___

_He gave me no reason to feel like that, but things have been so perfect lately that I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. So what do I do? Screw up things, AGAIN. Who needs Dawson Leery to sabotage my relationship with him? I do it by myself with honors.___

_For a long time, I blamed Dawson for how things ended between Pacey and me last summer. But I'm the only one to blame. I lied. I was the one who always put my needs in front of Pacey's, including my zombie friendship with Dawson. Cause let's face it, Dawson and I haven't been really friends since the day he made me turn in my dad. But no, my stubborn self had to insist on resuscitate a dead friendship, my last attachment to childhood, no matter how much I was hurting Pacey in the process. And I pushed him away so many times that I don't know why he's still around. I really don't deserve the guy.___

_Why do I push Pacey away? Why, when I love him so deeply and in every possible way? Because it's such a scary thing. Love, you know. I'm afraid to love him like I do, this overwhelming thing that makes me feel alive when I'm near him. And it scares the shit out of me. (God, even writing I ramble when I'm nervous, let's try to get straight to the point here, cause now even I am confused)_

_Why is it so scary? Because I can't control it. All my life I carefully planned each step, over analyzed all possibilities before making a decision, and with Pacey, I can't do that. Loving Pacey is like diving in the deep blue sea at night, where you can't see where you are, or being like a feather in the wind, never knowing where it will take you. It's unknown, scary, exciting altogether. (Rambling again) _

_Pacey used to say Dawson is like my security blanket and I have to admit he is right. Dawson was the constant, the steady, the routine, felt safe (except lately when he's been pulling out his The Shinning personality or should I say the shark in Jaws, that whenever he shows up you are not pleased? Ok, enough with movie references.) And boring might I add. Pacey, on the opposite hand, is the challenge, the roller coaster, the one who has something hidden upon his sleeve. He's the unknown that became all my knowledge, the uncertainty that became my certainties. (Sappy Joey strikes again: P) _

_I don't know if I should feel like this. I'm only 18 years old. Like I found my perfect match, the one who I will spend the rest of my life with. Maybe it's just a teenager fantasy, but the more I refuse to admit that, more sure I become that it's the undeniable truth. And I'm really afraid that he doesn't feel the same because the same ability he has to make me happy, he also owns the power to shatter my heart in million pieces. And I push him away, afraid of the pain of a broken heart, but the truth is I don't have a heart if he's not around. But he always comes back, but till when?_

_I can't keep on living on this constant fear, I can't keep on pushing him away, because I know that this way, I'm going to lose him, and I already had a glimpse of how life without Pacey Witter is and I can't live like that._

Pacey closed the book thoughtfully, part of him wondering what to do to calm down Joey's insecurities and part of him happy about how she could easily put in words how she felt about him. Better than speaking actually. They really had a communication issue going on. He sighed, he wanted to wake her, talk to her, show her how much he loved her, that she really didn't have a reason to be so scared, because he was scared of losing her himself. But as he had already read a part of her diary, if he was going to get in trouble for that, so, he was going to read the whole thing. Its first entry was New Year's Day.

_Pacey and I spent New Year's Eve with Bess at the B&B and we decided to spend the night together at the beach house. Gretchen wasn't home so we could have the entire place for ourselves. I even thought that it would be a perfect occasion to finally have sex with Pace and he thought the same thing…but (there's always but) I got scared…again. Not that we didn't have some fun though, but the real thing. Why am I so scared? He has already shown me how good it can be (and when I say good, I mean it…that guy knows where to put his handsJ) and I'm still scared. Dumb Potter._

He flipped through more pages and, a mischievous glint in his eyes when he found the entry he was looking for.

_Nice…What did I have in my stupid head to say nice? And why Pacey had to act like such a guy and ask me that? He knows pretty well that I'm not comfortable to verbalize when it comes to sex. And what words to use to describe our night together? I know I hurt him with my post coitus awkward act. Hope he won't take that as a sign of bad performance. Because that wasn't the case. _

_We fought all the weekend, tension between us have been terrible these past weeks. And the top point of it was me freaking out when he showed me the condom he had kept in his wallet. I accused him of expecting sex from me this weekend…Like I wasn't expecting that either. I was just too scared. And then he ended up telling me how afraid he is that Dawson still has a part of me, that he was afraid I was never going to let him love me the way he wanted. And he left me alone in our room, and I got really scared that he was going to break up with me._

_Later that night, I left the room, searching him through the familiar faces of class of 2001. Just to found him talking to Anna, and I approached them, none for them taking notice of my presence. Just to hear his last words._

_"This is not about sex. It's about sharing the most intimacy thing you can share with someone. No matter how long I have to wait." And those words showed me that somehow I was ready…we didn't have to wait anymore._

_We went back to our room and while I combed my hair, I felt my whole body shivering with anticipation. Pacey, oblivious to what was going on inside me, asked me if he could do that, our eyes meeting in the mirror. His eyes full of surprise when I told him that I wanted to throw the wrapper away. He became so nervous that if someone were watching us would think that he was the virgin. But all the feelings we had bottled these past months washed over us, taking all of us._

_How to describe how his hands and lips felt on my body? How to describe the feeling that can be compared to fly among the stars? (Poetic license here…you didn't think I was going to describe graphically what happed, I'm not ready for that yet) So I chose for the worst word combination: nice…I really should have brought my thesaurus. I feel so stupid that I should get kicked…At least I think I could make things better in the end telling him that I couldn't wait to get back at home so we could do it again. And I was speaking the truth blushing I think Pace created a monster, cause right now, the only thing I can think about is jumping on his bones._

He couldn't help the laughter at her last words…getting startled when he heard a sleepy voice right behind him.

"I wonder what you are finding so amusing, Pace."

He closed the notebook with a thud, trying to muster an excuse for reading her journal, ashamed of himself for doing that.

"Joey...I..."

"Pacey, I'm not mad, ok?" She sat beside him, her voice in a tired tone, taking the small book from his hands. "I'm just sad..."

"Jo..." He tried to reach her hands but she surprisingly stood up, pacing around the room.

"Pace, you don't owe me an explanation...you read it because you felt you needed to, and that's what's making me sad. That you had to read my journal to know what I'm thinking..." She sat again beside him, staring at the ceiling.

"Joey, I shouldn't have done that, can you forgive me?" He was getting worried as he had no answer. After a long pause, she turned to him, tears in her eyes.

"I really don't deserve you...I am the one who has to ask for forgiveness here, and you just do that..." He gently wiped her tears with his hands.

"Jo, why are you feeling this way? You know you have no reason to be jealous of Erin or any other woman." His blue eyes searching her brown ones for answers.

"I don't know, Pace...I trust you, I really do... But these fears I have overtake me and instead of telling you, sharing them with you, I keep them from you, closing off myself, making the same mistakes I did once, and that makes me even more scared, because I know that acting like that I'm making you leave."

"Jo, when are you getting in your thick head that I'm not leaving, unless you ask me to?" He chuckled lightly, trying to make her see his point. He knew pretty well what a bitch insecurity could be. It was what mined his thoughts last year, always waiting for her to leave, to realize that she should've chosen Dawson, and he was not letting her insecurities jeopardize their relationship now.

"Pace, this is not funny" She glared at him, not really mad "I don't know why I do this...it's a circle and it seems I'm not able to break it."

"Potter, listen to me." He cupped her face in his hands. "I'm not letting you do that to yourself, to us. Because this past year I did that too. Remember when you accused me of never having faith on us, always waiting for you to go back to Dawson? You were right. And that almost ruined our relationship. We both need faith on us, believe that we will make it. Because I think we will."

She smiled through her tears. He was one in a million. If there were a love lottery, she certainly won the first prize.

"You think, or you know?"

"I know." He rested his forehead against hers, smiling. She kissed him softly, letting her lips linger on his, grateful for having him in her life.

"And just for the record, I was going to give my journal for you to read anyway, to show you how much I trust you." She sighed.

"You were? So I was feeling guilty out of nothing?" He played along.

"Yep. You should see the look in your face when I came in..."  
"I'm glad that I was of use to your amusement." He kissed her again. "Did you realize this?"

"What?" Joey cocked her neck to face him, her eyes with a new shine.

"It was our first fight since we got back together."

"And the last one, I hope." She replied.

"No, it won't be" He kissed her to stop her protests. "Because we both enjoy the makeup sex really badly." He pointed each word with a kiss.

"If I weren't mad at you before, now I am." She kissed his neck, her actions going against her words. "This is all I am for you, Mr. Witter? Some chick to have sex with?"

"No, Ms. Potter, it's not only about sex. Quoting this fabulous writer I know, it's a feeling that can be compared to fly among the stars"

"I am so gonna kill you…you read that too?"

"I had to see if you wrote something more than nice there." He shrugged. Teasing her was one of the easiest things in his life.

"You are a dead man, Pacey Witter."

"At least I'll be a happy dead man." He grinned when he saw the spark in her eyes.

"I missed you, Pace" Her face suddenly serious.

"I missed you, too, Jo." He stood up with her in his arms. "What about we solve this problem now? You, me, my bed."

"You really think too much about sex, Pace."

"Just when it's been two days since I last touched the woman I love properly."

"It's ok, then. I missed my teddy last night too. Just because of that." She replied nonchalantly, decided to have the last words.

He laughed, throwing her over his shoulder, walking the few steps towards his bedroom with her like that, Joey trying her best to control her laughter.

"You are such a Neanderthal." She said when he put her over his bed.

"Me Pacey, you Joey" He quipped on his best Tarzan voice.

She opened her mouth to reply, but he kissed her, making her forget anything else but him.

Jack was caressing Jen's hair. Joey had told her that afternoon about Charlie and Audrey and since then she was crying. He felt so useless, he had broken up with his boyfriend too, and he was hurting inside and didn't know what else to do to help Jen. He heard the laughter coming from outside, knowing that at least Pacey and Joey had concealed their differences. Why life couldn't be easier?

"Jack?"

"What, Jen?" God, he hated seeing her like this.

"Why do things never work for us?"

"I don't know, sweetie, I don't know."

"Can you sleep here with me tonight?" her voice small.

"You didn't have to ask." He laid beside her, holding her in his arms, trying to comfort her till both of them drifted off to sleep.

The first lights of dawn were touching the sky when Pacey opened his eyes, missing Joey beside him. She was sitting by the window, wearing one of his shirts, her knees next to her chest, looking thoughtfully through the window. He got up, slipped his boxers on, and touched her shoulder to make her notice him. She stood up without a word, and he sat, pulling her to his lap, his chin resting on top of her head.

"Why are you out of bed so early?" he asked in a sleepy voice.

"I needed to think." She kissed his face. "I'm still feeling bad for Jen, you know. I feel like I was so worried with myself, with being a good girlfriend, that I forgot I had to be a friend too."

"Jo, it wouldn't make any difference, and you know that." He tightened his arms around her. "You wouldn't stop Charlie and Audrey of screwing up. You are beautiful like a goddess, but you are not really one, you know?" He nuzzled her neck.

"There's something else in my mind too."

"Really, what's it?"

"The money I owe to Dawson. I have to give him back all that money, Pacey, but if I do that I won't be able to stay at Worthington."

"And if you transfer?"

"I don't know if my scholarship will allow me to do that. But after all that happened, I can't keep his money, even if it means that I will have to drop out college."

"Joey, you can't give up on college. We will find a way, you will see. If I could, I would give you the money, you know that."

"I know, Pace. I'll talk to Bess during Christmas break and try to look for a way to make this work out."

"Don't tire your pretty head too much, sweetheart. Now, can we go back to bed, please?"

"That was such a married line, Pacey."

"Just for you to get used to it, love."

"At least you didn't call me woman, this time."

"Ok, woman, move your butt back to bed."

"If you keep talking like this, it's couch for you, mister." She laughed as they headed back to his bed.

The end of finals came with no much surprise. Joey had made the Dean's list. Pacey had done well, not that well, but close. Jen and Jack were trying to mend their broken hearts. What was worse was Joey situation. She kept looking for a way out of the money she owed to Dawson, and Audrey was not being friendly lately. But she could put all that at rest for a while now, she thought as she jumped into the passenger's seat in Pacey's car. They were going back home now. Back to Capeside.


	27. The proposal

Part 27 – The proposal

Pacey swallowed the nervous lump in his throat. After Joey telling him that she had been thinking about dropping out Worthington because she didn't want to depend on Dawson's money anymore, he tried to find a way so she could keep studying there, like she always had dreamt. He already found a way, but it was his Christmas surprise, well, at least one of them, but he had to talk to Bessie first if she would be ok with that. He had already told Doug and his parents what he had in mind, and surprisingly his family didn't say he was crazy, actually, they even supported his decision. Being in good terms with his family...he never thought it would be possible, and it still felt weird.

He knocked the door, knowing perfectly well that Joey wouldn't be at the B&B, she said she would go shopping with Jen, they needed some girl time alone. He breathed deeply, when Bessie opened the door.

"Hi, Pacey. Joey isn't home now, she went out with Jen." Bessie told him, as she let him in.

"I know, Bess. Actually, I came here to talk to you."

Bessie looked at Pacey surprised. He looked like a little boy about to tell his parents that he was in some mess, and she knew that look by heart, since he had it so many times in his life.

"To me? Pacey, I know you have a thing for older women, but I'm your girlfriend's sister…"

Pacey rolled his eyes…those Potter women; they really knew how to annoy him.

"Bessie, it's about Joey we have to talk."

"She's not pregnant again, is she?"

"You have a fixed idea about this, don't you? No, she's not, at least not that I know" He shrugged, earning a glare back "But it's as serious as that."

"We can go to the kitchen and you will tell me exactly what's going on, Pacey Witter, while we have some coffee."

"I don't know, Jen…do you really think Pacey will like it?" Joey looked at the mirror, unsure if that red dress was right for her.

"He has eyes, doesn't he? Joey, you look great. Although I still think he would like even if you weren't wearing anything…"

"Jen!" Joey blushed. "You know, I've missed these little talks with you."

"I missed that too, Joey…Who would ever guess, huh?"

"Yep…I've been so wrapped around Pacey lately…"

"Jo, you don't have to feel guilty about that…we already talked about that. And there's nothing you could do to stop Charlie of acting like a jerk."

"Joey, Jennifer."

They turned around to see Gale Leery calling them. They stared at each other, not knowing how to act.

"Hello, girls, how are you doing?"

"We're fine." The both girls answered, still not sure how to act around Dawson's mother.

"Joey, darling, I hope that you guys will be able to show up at my Christmas party."

Joey didn't know what to answer. She had forgotten about the Leery's Christmas party. And she had promised that she wouldn't let Dawson interfere in her friendship with the rest of his family.

"I will have to talk to Bessie and Pacey first, I think his family has plans…" she started to speak, looking at Jen for an idea.

"Oh, I'll talk to the Witters, maybe they can come too. I have to go now…it's past Lilly's nap time. Bye, girls"

Jen and Joey muttered their good-byes, before Jen burst into laughter.

"What, Jen?"

"Now we know where Dawson got his oblivious way to view the world." That idea brought a smile on Joey's lips too, but she soon frowned. How would she tell Pacey that Gale Leery just invited them for her party?

"Jack!"

Jack almost choked on his Doritos, when he heard that voice. He took a glance at his watch, damn, he really spent too much time checking out those guys at the airport.

"Andie!" He hugged his sister, spinning her around. "I missed you girl."

"I missed you too, Jackers. Dad decided to stay in Italy for Christmas, but I had to come and check on my handsome brother."

"Talk, talk, all you do is talk, Andie."

"How is everyone?"

"Jen is fine, Pacey and Joey are disturbingly happy and Dawson , we don't know and don't wanna know."

"What happened? So, Pacey and Joey are an item again. And they're not on speaking terms with Dawson?"

"I'll tell you everything while we drive to Capeside."

"Pacey, what is going on that head of yours?" She ruffled his hair, comfortably sat on his lap in front of the fire at the B&B. She had already told him about the invitation, and he agreed they could show up, say their Merry Christmas to Mitch and Gale and head back home as soon as possible.

"My head? My head, is perfectly ok, Jo." He kissed her softly.

She tilted her head, looking him in the eyes, a crooked smile on her lips.

"I know you, Pacey Witter. And I know you're hiding something from me."

"I'm hiding nothing, Jo. It's true."

"I have this feeling that people are hiding…"

"Joey, stop being suspicious." Pacey kissed her forehead.

"I'm not suspicious…but you have this look that you're up to something. Jen said some stuff I didn't understand and Bessie…she hugged me like she hadn't seen me in months when I came home back form shopping."

"My dear Josephine, you're worrying me. So, it's a conspiracy, now?" He chuckled.

"Stop it, Pacey. I have my ways to take the truth out of you, you know?"

"I'd like to know what ways…"  
"I could kiss you." She kissed him softly on the lips, her lips soon finding the small birthmark on his neck.

"I like your ways, Jo, but no, it's not working"

"Where I feel it is…" she pressed her body against his.

"God, Jo, nothing is sacred to you anymore? Your sister can come in anytime."

"But we're not doing anything." Her mouth searched for his, but before they could actually kiss, someone clearing his throat interrupted them.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I don't wanna my son scared for life with you two." Bodie was grinning at them, holding Alex in one arm.

"Hmmm...hi, Bodie" Pacey managed to say. "I guess it's my time to go, huh?"

"Not really, Pacey, Doug called, it seems that Gretchen decided to show up for Christmas and she's at his place, so he asked if you could stay here."

Joey's face lit up with that, she was so used to sleep in his arms now that last night was really difficult to fall asleep.

"I don't want to cause any kind of trouble here."

"Pacey, you're family, you two just behave, ok?"

The couple looked at each other in happiness; they wouldn't be apart these winter nights after all.

Doug stopped at the Leery's porch. He hated to give bad news, especially about someone he knew as a kid. A shiver went through his spine when he thought that he could be on the other hand of the bad news, if Pacey hadn't changed so much in the past two years. It was ironic of how his brother, so called the town loser, was now so sure of his life, of what he wanted for his life, while his former best friend, the called golden boy, was in a such mess. Doug rang the bell, waiting impatiently. It was too cold to be outside at that time of the night.

Mitch opened the door, surprised to find Doug waiting for him. What could have happened? An only thought ran through his mind. Dawson.

"What happened to my son, Doug?"

"He was arrested, Mr. Leery."

Pacey entered the room. Joey was standing in front of the mirror, combing her hair. He stepped closer, circling her waist with his arms, his chin resting on her shoulder, eyes meeting through their reflex, making them smile.

"The simple sight of you doing this brings me memories that take my breath away." He whispered, kissing her shoulder.

"Is Christmas putting some romantic ideas on your head, Witter?" she tilted her head, offering him better access to her neck.

"You know me, Potter. King of romantic gestures." He nipped her earlobe gently.

"Yeah, I know…" She sighed, her eyes suddenly turning serious.

"Anything wrong, Jo?" He turned her in his arms so he could face her.

"Nothing wrong, Pace. I'm' just wondering…" she left his arms, pulling over her bed's covers, climbing in bed.

"Joey Potter never wonders, she gets worried." He stated, climbing in bed after her, bringing her to the safety of his arms. "Tell me what is going on that pretty head of yours." He kissed her forehead and waited.

"Do you think we're weird, Pace?" she lifted her eyes to meet his.

"Us, weird? Who gave you that idea, Jo?" He chuckled at the thought.

"I was talking to Jen today and she said something that made me think that…" she kissed his shoulder.

"I'm gonna kill Lindley for putting ideas on your head." He tightened his arms around her. "What did she say?"

"She said we're not the average 18 year old couple, we have this whole aura around us."

"Aura? What the hell has been Jen taking?" he asked, earning a pinch on his side. "Ouch, Jo! What was that for?"

"For interrupting me." She said smiling.

Pacey moved them, so he was lying on top of her, his mouth tracing a line from her ear to her neck.

"I love when you get all violent on me." He whispered, his voice sending shivers through her body.

"Pace…" she sighed, her voice half laughing, half moaning. "We promised to behave."

"You promised, I crossed my fingers." He stated, proceeding with his assault, taking off her shirt, his mouth reaching her breasts, his teeth teasing her nipples with soft bites as his hand wandered down her spine, leaving her breathless He raised his head, just to look at her face, her eyelids heavy with desire, and a soft blush on her cheeks, biting her lower lip. One of the most beautiful sights, one he could never grow tired with. He grinned as he moved aside, interrupting his actions, making her stare at him confused.

"Why did you stop?" she asked, trying to regain her breath.

"Because you still have to explain that aura thing to me."

"You are such a tease, Witter." She slapped his chest lightly. "I don't know if I should say anything…I might need motivation."

"Jo, if I give you more motivation, Bessie will kill me." Pacey kissed her nose.

"You are one of the most irritable, impertinent, incorrigible men in this world." She pouted.

"And you love me." He kissed her cheek, caressing her hair. Joey smiled, snuggling against him. "Are you going to explain the aura thing?"

She gave him that look that made his stomach do flip flops, the 'you're so dead, Witter' look, then she grinned, the tip of her tongue peeking through her teeth. She rested her head on his shoulder, smiling. They could be weird, but she wanted to be weird like that for the rest of her life.

"Jen said that most people our age experiencing college are out there, getting drunk, getting laid with as many partners as possible, and we have this whole commitment thing around us."

"And now you think we should be doing that?"

"I didn't say that, Pace. In fact, I told her that we're different because we're lucky." Joey was looking into his eyes.

"Lucky?" He looked at her wiggling his brows. "Elaborate that, please." Pacey brought her hand to his lips, biting her fingers.

"I said that, Pace, because I feel so lucky for having you in my life." She sighed, trying to clear her thoughts, which was a hard job, because her boyfriend's hand was dangerously reaching below.

"And I'm so lucky for having you in my life too…" He whispered in her ear, covering her body with his, pinning her against the mattress, his mouth searching for hers, demanding, and their breaths ragged. He groaned when he felt her hand slipping inside his boxers, stroking him, in slow motion, before tugging on his waistband to set him free of the offending article.

"Pace," he barely heard her moan, when he got rid of her panties, his fingers finding her wet core, his tongue tracing the pulse in her throat. "Lay back, love, please."

He obeyed her, his eyes darkened by desire. Joey moved her body against his, her breath warming his neck. Pacey closed his eyes when she kissed the sensitive spot in his neck, her tongue mimicking his previous actions.

"You wanna know why I feel so lucky?" she whispered against his skin, her mouth traveling along his body, teasing and tasting him, each murmured word a soft caress. "You have always been there for me, even before we were together. You have this big heart that's always ready to love and forgive, with no reserves. No ultimatums. You saw me when I was invisible, not much more than an ugly tomboy." She raised her eyes to see his face, his gritted teeth, trying hard not to moan out loud.

"You were never ugly…" he replied, locking his eyes with hers for a moment, before he felt her tongue licking his length, her hand stroking him, her soft whispers against his cock driving him crazy.

"You never wanted me to change…you loved me how I am, with all my fears and flaws." She took him slowly in her mouth, her teeth grazing his hard flesh, before sucking him.  
Pacey closed his eyes, wondering how much more he could last. A muffled grunt escaped his lips when Joey let him go off her mouth, as he observed her positioning herself on top of him.

"And above all, Pace, I am lucky, because when I see you, I see my future," Joey whispered, as she eased her body on his, taking him inch by inch, inside her. He laced his hands with hers to give her support, watching through heavy lidded eyes her breasts bouncing with their movements, her face taken by pleasure, the way she was chewing on her lower lip, her head slightly thrown back. They rocked their bodies against each other, speeding their rhythms as their need for pleasure increased. Pacey felt her walls tightening around him, his name passing through her lips in a suppressed cry as she climaxed, triggering his own climax. Joey collapsed on top of him, her head resting on his chest while they tried to regain their breaths, just enjoying the sound of his raced heartbeat. She lifted her face, her brown eyes shining with all she felt for him, a soft smile playing on her lips. Pacey grinned back at her, his fingers lost in her hair.

"That was amazing, Jo." He pulled her for a kiss, his lips lingering on hers, nipping her lower lip.

"I had a good teacher." She winked.

"And you're a dedicated student. And just for the record, Jo, I am the luckiest man on earth, because I have you."

"You say that because you just got lucky, mister."

"God woman, can't I declare my undying love for you without any kind of sexual innuendos?"

"Undying love?" she asked, in a teasing tone.

"Yes, Potter, undying love, because when I see your eyes, I see more than my future, I see the rest of my life and even after that." Pacey kissed her softly. "And I see one more thing."

"What, Pace?"

"That we're both going to be in big, big trouble with your sister tomorrow."

"I forgot about that." She looked at him sheepishly.

"Yeah, you were too busy ravishing me."

"I didn't hear any complaints." She shrugged.

"Well, since we're already in trouble…" Pacey flipped them, his blue eyes shining mischievously. "It's your turn to be ravished, Miss Potter."

"Any time you want, Mr. Witter." She whispered, before his mouth came over hers.

Dawson opened his eyes inside the small cell. How dared Doug lock him there just because of some booze? His dad would come any moment now to take him back home. He raised his eyes to face Deputy Doug staring him.

"Where's my father, Doug? Why aren't you opening this damn lock?"

"I have a message for you from Mr. Leery. Have a good night of sleep, Dawson." Doug answered coldly, leaving him alone. Even his own family was against him.

"Mitch, what happened? Who was there?" Gale asked when her husband when he got back to their bedroom.

"It was Doug Witter, Gale." He pushed the covers and laid back, staring the ceiling.

"But…what happened? Where's Dawson?" Suddenly she felt really scared.

"Dawson was arrested for being drunk." He stated flatly.  
"And why are you here? Aren't you going to…"

"No, Gale, I'm not bailing him out tonight. He needs to think about what he's dong to his life."

"But…"

"No buts, Gale. Our son is throwing his life away, always hoping that mom and dad will be there to save his ass. But not anymore."

"Mitch, it's Christmas." She pleaded.

"Christmas or not Christmas is about time to Dawson to learn something. We spoiled that kid, Gale, way too much." He kissed her forehead. "Let's try to sleep and tomorrow morning I'll go take that butthead out, ok?"

"Ok" She lied. It was not ok, her baby was spending the night at a cold jail cell. "Good night."

Joey opened her eyes, feeling Pacey's arms around her body, his breath on her neck, and sighed happy. They had an incredible night, and sure they would get a lecture from Bessie, but it had been worth. She smiled remembering the small touches, the kisses, the whispered words, and frowned when she remembered the Leerys' Christmas party. Why didn't she say 'no' when Gale asked them to go?

"Morning, beautiful." Pacey whispered, nuzzling her neck, his morning stubble against her skin.

"Morning, sweetheart" she turned around in his arms, kissing his chin. "Ready to face the other Potter sister?"

Pacey groaned at that perspective. Although they tried to be as silent as they could, Bessie sure heard them. But the complete air of happiness in Joey's face gave him the strength he needed.

"If you keep looking at me like that, I'll face one thousand Bessie's…"

"You're a brave man, Witter." She smiled, watching him leave the bed and starting to get dressed, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. Life was good. Not even a thousand Dawsons could ruin her day. And right there, she made her decision. She was not going to the Leerys' party.

Dawson walked behind his father, the death glare Mitch gave him when he was out his stinky cell, still lingering on the back of his mind. He knew he was in for big trouble. He made mention to go to his room, but Mitch stopped him.

"No, Dawson, you're not going to your bedroom. Sit down, now."

"But, dad…" he whined.

"No buts. We're having a man to man talk."

"Dad, can I first take a shower?"

"No, Dawson, you can't. Not before you listen to some truths, young man."

"spare me the lecture."

"Listen, Dawson. I don't know what the hell you're doing with your life. Jesus, you dropped the school of your dreams, now you're getting publicly drunk. What's next? Drugs? Mugging?"

"I'm just enjoying life."

"You are throwing away your life. You want to give up school? Fine. But you're not going to stay in this house with your lazy ass up all day. You are going to work, until you find out anything inside your big head."

"You talk like you never did any mistake."

"But at least I learnt from them. Now, go to your bedroom. And don't go beg for your mom to sweeten me, cause it's not gonna work this time."

Dawson left the room, climbing the stairs, slamming his door, waking up baby Lilly. Mitch just looked at the stairs wondering how they reached that point.

Joey glanced confused at Pacey. They were going to his parents place to have Christmas dinner, as they originally had planned. Bessie and Bodie had left first, they were already late, and Pacey decided to stop in the middle of the town. In front of her wall, their wall, the same wall that still had his 'hastily yet adoringly written SOS' in big red letters on it.

"Pacey, what are we doing here?" He seemed nervous, almost uncomfortable.

"Would you walk with me for a while?" he asked. Joey nodded, knitting her brows, a little bit worried at his behavior.

They left the car, walking hand in hand, stopping in front of their wall. Pacey kept starign at her, like he was considering what to say next.

"Pace, sweetheart, what is going on? Anything wrong?"

He cleared his throat, chuckling before answering; making Joey more certain that something was going on.

"There's nothing wrong, Jo." He smiled, cupping her face between his hands. "Nothing wrong at all, sweetie." He leaned in, kissing her forehead.

"Pacey, why did you bring me here? It's freezing; we're already late for your parents' dinner. You don't wanna go to your parents, is that it?"

"No, Jo, we're going there, I just wanted to talk to you first."

"About?" She was seeing no sense in Pacey's acts.

He cleared his throat again. God, this was more difficult as he had thought. He breathed deeply, exhaling slowly, trying to calm down. He wanted to do this, He could do this, hell, and he was going to do it. He looked at the wall again.

"Jo, I just want to give my Christmas presents to you now, alone with you."

"And you have to do this at this ungodly temperature, in the middle of the town?"

"Yes, because it's my turn to ask you to stay."

"I'm missing your point here…" she started, but he silenced her touching her lips.

"You said you were going to give up on school because you wanted to give Dawson's money back to him and you wouldn't be able to afford your tuition anymore."

"Pacey, we already talked about that, I'm going to try to transfer…"

"Jo, just listen, please. I couldn't let you jeopardize your future like that. I went to Mr. Kubelik, and told him you were thinking about dropping school because of money. He took a look at your grades, Jo, and Worthington is offering you a better scholarship, as long as you keep your grades."

"You did that for me?" she was amazed at how far he could go for her.

"I did it for you, because I don't want you to give up on any of your dreams." He kissed her gently. "But we have a small here."

"Problem?"

"Your scholarship doesn't cover your accommodations."

"Pacey, if I can't stay at the dorms, I won't be…"

"Can you please, wait a little, woman? I solved that too. I'm asking you to stay in Boston, Jo, stay with me."

"Pacey, are you asking me to move in with you? What about Jen and Jack?"

"They already know and they agreed. They are your friends, Jo, they want you to be happy."

She jumped on his arms, kissing him. This man was her world, her everything and he made her life perfect.

"So, after Christmas break I'll be moving in with my boyfriend." She stated cockily.

"No, you're not."

"Pacey, I don't understand it...you just asked me…"

Like a dream, she saw him kneel down in front of her, retrieving a small box form his jacket. She fought the tears that were threatening to fall, when he took her hand.

"I said it was my turn to ask you to stay." He cleared his throat again, his blue eyes so full of love. "Jo, you are my past, my present, and my future. I see us in five years, getting home from work, I see your smile when you have our first child, I see us in ten years, twenty. Always together. People might say we're too young, but if there's one thing I'm sure in this life, that thing is you and my love for you. So I'm not asking you to stay with your boyfriend. I'm asking you to stay with your fiancé." He opened the box, revealing the shining ring. "Miss Josephine Potter, will you marry me?"

Jen looked around at the Leerys' party. Grams had been invited, and not having any other place to go, she had gone along with Jack and Andie. She saw Dawson nearing, immediately getting annoyed.

"Hi, Jen."

"Hi, Dawson" she replied as coldly as she could.

"How are things?"

"Dawson, cut the small talk, what do you want to know?"

"I want to know if Joey is coming."

"No, Dawson, she's not coming. She has an engagement party to attend"

"Engagement party? Who's getting engaged?"

"She is." She answered, leaving him alone.

Joey stared at Pacey is awe. Never, not even in her wildest dreams, she had thought he would propose.

"Jo?" He asked her, worried about her silence. He looked up, to see her tear strained face, a dreamy smile on her lips. He stood up, taking her in his arms. "Jo, sweetheart, don't cry, please, forget I asked anything. I…"

"Pace, you are not kidding about this, are you?" She asked him in a thin voice.

"I've never been so serious in my entire life, Jo…" he whispered, drying her tears with small kisses.

"Pacey, aren't you going to put that ring on my finger?" she asked through her tears.

"Is that a yes?" he was now grinning like an idiot.

"You wouldn't even have to ask." They stared at each other, his hand shaking when he slid the ring on her finger, and then spinning her on his arms. And right there, in front of their wall, in that cold winter night, they kissed under the falling snow like there was no tomorrow.


	28. Christmas Morning

Chapter 28 – Christmas morning

Joey woke up with a feeling of happiness she hadn't felt in a long time. She always associated Christmas with the void her mom left in her life, but this Christmas gave her something she missed all along. A family that she and Pacey would have in a near future. She gazed dreamily at her ring; the oval cut blue stone shining. Blue like her favorite color. Like Pacey's eyes. Last night's events and words still too recent in her memory to be forgotten in any detail.

_"This ring is so beautiful, Pace." She couldn't keep her eyes off it.___

_"They call this aqua-marine. Sea water." His fingers caressed her hand, tracing the ring he gave her. "The sea brought us together, and then apart, so I thought that sea should bring us back together for good. Full circle." He chuckled. "I read somewhere that Ancient Greeks believed that there was a vein that ran from the fourth finger on your left hand straight to your heart. And that circles were the most perfect geometric shape. Endless. That's why your ring stays right here." He ran his fingers lightly tracing the imaginary vein. An endless promise of love. Eternal." ___

_"You're amazing, you know." Her eyes full of unshed tears.___

_"No, I just had too much time to plan this."___

_"And I have no words to reply to all this."___

_"You already did, Jo, you said yes."_

She sighed looking at the man sleeping beside her. Her fiancé. She giggled at the thought. Who would ever guess that she would be engaged to Pacey Witter and so happy about it?

"Sleeping Beauty is finally awake." She heard the deep voice, feeling his arms tighten around her.

"I thought you were sleeping." She kissed his shoulder.

"Me? Sleeping when I have my gorgeous fiancée here with me?"

"So all that noise I heard wasn't you snoring?"

"Unlike you, I don't snore, Ms. Potter."

"I do not snore, Pacey"

"You do that too." He rolled them over, chuckling.

"Remind me again why I accepted to marry you."

"You love me."

"You bug me." She pouted, kissing him. "Hey, Pace."

"What?" he was occupied kissing a trail down her neck.

"You're heavy, you know."

"So this is how things are going to be now? What's next, headache?" he mocked.

"Maybe." She smiled, the tip of her tongue peaking out between her teeth.

"Maybe? Ok, I'm out of here." He mentioned to leave the bed.

"Teddy?" She put her arms around his neck, keeping him securely where he was.

"Don't Teddy on me, Potter. That hurts, ya know?"

"Teddy?" she kissed the sensitive spot below his ear.

"Nope, I'm not falling, Jo."

"Not even if I promise to kiss it better where it hurts?" she wiggled her brows suggestively.

"Perv."

"Prude."

"C'mon, Pace, I thought we were beyond that. We're adults now."

"Talk about yourself, sweetheart."

"Be serious, Pacey."

"I am serious, Potter." He smiled teasingly. "So, how does this kiss it better work?"

A bang on the door interrupted them.

"Guys, can you stop mauling each other and come outside?"

They heard Jen yelling through the closed door, causing them to bust into laughter.

"I guess, I will have to explain it later, Pace."

"Or we could ignore Jen." He replied loud enough to be heard.

"I heard that, Pacey Witter."

"I guess we don't have a choice, sweetie, move on." Joey stated, making Pacey groan. "I promise you will know all about kissing it better later." She added in a sexy whisper.

"I'm not letting you off the hook on that, Potter."

"And I don't wanna be let off the hook on that." She winked. "C'mon, loverboy, let's go unwrap our gifts." She stood up; trying to take him along, but he pulled her again to the bed.

"Unwrap gifts? Jo, you're already naked." He nuzzled her neck, and all she did was roll her eyes, both bursting into laughter.

"Hey, Pace?"

"Yes, Potter." He was still trying his best to seduce her, knowing he wouldn't win that one.

"Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, Jo." They kissed one last time, before getting dressed to enjoy their Christmas morning.

They had a day full of fun. No one could help the laughter when Pacey unwrapped his gift from Joey, a book called "The Simpsons and Philosophy". Through the laughter, she whispered that was the mock gift. Later, later he would have the real thing.

Snow covered everything, and like children they played, silly snowball fights with Jen, Jack and Andie, until they were freezing, and Bessie and Grams called them to get some hot cocoa and cookies. The girls were all in front of the fireplace, waiting for the boys who went changing.

"Andie, are you OK with this?" Joey asked, pointing her ring, somewhat worried about her.

Andie sighed, no she would never really be ok with Pacey getting married to Joey, but she never saw him happy like he was today, as if he had found heaven on earth, and Andie knew. His heaven was Joey.

"Joey, it doesn't matter if I'm OK or not. You are happy, Pacey is happy and I'm happy for you both." She smiled. "That's what really matters."

"Thanks Andie, that means a lot to me."

"I had my chance with him, Joey, and even if I hadn't screwed it, I think the ending would be the same, you'd be the one wearing his ring."

"No cat fight? You guys are disappointing me." Jen mocked.

"Jen!" Andie and Joey replied together, and that exact moment Pacey and Jack returned.

"Has anyone here mentioned cat fights?" Pacey asked, comfortably settling behind Joey, his arms circling her waist.

"I think I heard that too." Jack said, stealing one of Jen's cookies.

"Sorry, sweetie, but it's not today you're getting your sexist fantasy fulfilled." Joey deadpanned.

"Damn, and I was here thinking that it would be my real Christmas gift." Pacey exclaimed, making everyone laugh.

"But Pace, I thought that would help you through the hard studies of Philosophy…"

"Like that Math for dummies you gave me on junior year?"

"It helped, didn't it?"

"Jack, please tell me again, why did we agree with them living with us?" Jen whined.

"Because you love us, Lindley." Pacey answered.

"And because of those leather pants I have that you love." Joey completed to everyone's laughter.

It had been a good day. Laughter had filled it, totally angst free, just a good day spent among friends. Joey smiled in the dim light in her bedroom, Pacey's real gift in hand. Compared to what he'd given, it was too sentimental, even silly, and she even questioned if he would like it. She didn't even notice that Pacey had entered the room and was sitting beside her on the bed.

"Jo?" He whispered, eyeing the big box on her hand.

"Hey." She turned to kiss him. "It was a good day today, wasn't it?"

"It was indeed, Miss Potter." He rested his forehead against hers. "What's this?"

"It's your gift. It's so silly compared to what you gave me…and I'm not sure if you're gonna like it…"she started.

"Jo, stop rambling. Whatever it is, I'm gonna like because you gave it to me. Unless of course it's a box full of pictures of naked men."

"Smart ass."

"Joey, stop the foreplay. I actually want to look at my present before ravish you."

"Keep talking like that and the only thing you will ravish tonight is the couch." She smiled, but was somewhat tense while he slowly unwrapped the box.

"It's a boat." He stated, looking at the build it yourself kit of a model boat. A small sailboat that looked exactly like True Love.

"I know it's not even close to the real thing, Pace" Joey whispered, while Pacey kept staring at her. "I really, really wanted to give you the real thing, but I couldn't afford, so I had to settle for the next best thing. I know it's silly, but I wanted a symbol of what we had, to remind us both of what we still can have. And I know one day we're gonna have the real boat to sail off into the sunset again…and…"

"Jo" Pacey silenced her, his thumb lightly caressing her lips. "I don't think it's silly, As a matter of fact, I think it's really sweet."

"You do?" she raised her eyes, a soft smile on her lips.

"I do. And I do love my present. Are you gonna help to put this together?"

"I thought you could do this one on your own," she teased.

"I could never build True Love without you, Jo." His eyes showing the deep meaning behind his words.

"Neither could I, Pace." Their lips met in a sweet kiss.

"Hey, Jo?"

"Yep"

"What about that kiss it better thing?"

"I thought you'd never ask." She replied, taking him to bed with her. That was really a perfect Christmas.

Dawson paced inside his bedroom like a caged animal. The simple idea of Joey, his little Joey Potter, engaged to Pacey making him sick, driving him nuts. That bastard had stolen everything from him. His girl, his friends. That afternoon he was wandering around and saw them playing in the snow. Pacey was the sidekick, the one supposed to be out cast. Not him, golden boy Dawson Leery. He was the hero, and he needed to get his leading lady back. No matter what.

He sneaked out of his room, heading straight to his father's back office. He knew exactly what he needed from there. Something to take Pacey Witter out of his way. For good.


	29. Bloody Snow

Chapter 29 – Bloody Snow

"Go away, Jo...It's too early." Pacey groaned, pulling the comforter over his head. 

"Pace, we need to leave soon if you want me to move in with you before New Year's" A fully clothed Joey took the sheets covering her fiancé, forcing him to wake up.

"You already up." He mumbled sleepily.

"Up and packed…and by the way, don't get used to me packing up for you, Pacey. It took me twice as much time that it did to do my own. Now rise and shine sweetheart, because you will have a lot to do today." She stated.

"Too bossy, Potter." He muttered, pulling her onto the bed. "I love you being bossy." He whispered, kissing her. "Good morning, baby."

"Morning, Pace. I know it's too early, but I'm kind of anxious to get done with this moving." She replied, putting her arms around his neck.

"Can't wait to have your hands all over me all the time, huh?" He asked, detangling from her arms and leaving the bed.

"Yeah, right." Joey lied chuckling, leaving the bed, too, patting his butt on her way out. "Don't primp so much, Teddy." She called from the door, closing it seconds before being hit by a pillow.

Dawson walked through the snow-covered streets of Capeside, a bottle of vodka already in his system, his numbed mind working slowly. He already had everything he needed for his plan. What was the plan again? Right, to get his storyline back on track. He was the hero, he couldn't be delegated to the sidekick role. As he was also the writer and director, the only thing he really needed was to get rid of the impostor, the one who should never have left his shadow place. He chuckled to his thoughts. Get rid of him and everything will fall into order and perfect sense again. He patted his pocket. Yeah, that would be an easy task, he thought, heading to the Potter's B&B.

Dawson watched from afar as Pacey loaded his car's trunk. It would be perfect, and too easy. He was alone; no one would ever be suspicious. Set to fulfill his plan, his move was interrupted by the tall brunette, his leading lady, coming after Pacey like a guardian angel. Cursing under his breath, once more forced to rewrite the script in his head; his mixed and distorted feelings of anger, hurt, betrayal, possession, and forced love for her cruising through his veins, strengthening his resolve. What were seconds to who was waiting for so long.

"Pacey! You forgot your books." He turned smiling to see Joeys flushed face, a soft pink coloring her cheeks from both the cold and the running she did after him.

"You're starting to sound all wifely, Jo." Pacey circled her waist, bringing her closer. "I like it."

"Look, Witter, if you're starting to make any sexist comments…" she started, her words getting caught by his mouth in a long kiss.

Dawson watched the couple's exchange, grimacing, the last shreds of reality overruled by the false belief that Joey would understand, would finally be his, urged him on to stepping out of his hidden place.

Joey and Pacey broke the kiss, staring at each other's eyes smiling, the proximity of their bodies protecting them from the cold. They were about to kiss again when their former friend's cold slurring voice stopped them.

"If it's not my favorite people in this world…my two best friends."

"What do you want, Dawson?" Pacey asked sighing, protectively tightening his arms around Joey, who placed her head on his shoulder, definitely not interested in talking to Dawson.

"I don't want anything, just talk. How are you, Joey? Still with the loser?"

Her head shot up, she was so ready to give him a piece of her mind when she felt the squeeze.

"Dawson, we have nothing to talk about, and if you excuse us, we're already late." She replied as calm as possible, truly annoyed with his words but wanting nothing more than climbing in to the car and leave the town, irritated with Dawson's behavior.

"But we're just starting here, Joey." He started rambling and pacing around. "You know, I've always wondered how to get my life back in track. And last night I had this epiphany."  
Pacey observed Dawson, his movements were frantic, restless, his clothes were crumbled and the left side pocket had a familiar bulge. His father's figure in mind, a Hip Flask hidden in his uniform. Joey's eyes were also following Dawson's pacing form while she placed her head back on Pacey's chest. The blonde was sure testing her patience.

"Yeah, I had an epiphany. You see, the only way I figure to bring this storyline back to its perfect sense is to get rid of some undesirable guest appearances." 

Two pairs of eyes starred at him. Joey was faster with responding.

"Dawson, it's time to get home – for you to write your remarkable story on paper," adding in her mind 'before it gets lost in the depth of your booze numbed mind' "and for us to get moving. On that note, bye Dawson." Joey had already moved out of Pacey's embrace and was now on her way along the passenger side while Pacey turned to walk to the driver's door, sending a "Bye Dawson" over his shoulder.

Pacey startled when he heard a very familiar noise for someone who grew up in a Sheriff household. He yelled at Joey to lay down while he dived under the car turning to get a glimpse of Dawson's figure. A confused Joey crawled to his side, following his gaze to see Dawson waving around with a gun. Shocked she reached for Pacey's hand, desperately forcing herself to stay calm.

"Josephine, Josephine, Josephine. You should accept that your place is with me. All this is your fault. You shouldn't wear his ring, pretending you're going to marry him. You should have told him, you are mine and mine alone. You are destined to marry me, the golden boy, not some fucked up loser. I'm generous enough to oversee that scum touched you, you are dirty, white trash. You'll be pure again. I just have to erase the sorry excuse for human being and the spell you're living in is broken. The sidekick who's wasting space on earth will be gone to hell where he belongs and we'll get the happy every after as it should be. Bliss, blessed, beautiful. Soul mates, Joey."

Each word lifted a weight from Dawson shoulder, convincing him that he was doing the right thing. Pacey listened knowing that, in the insane state Dawson was, their lives were in danger, praying for someone, anyone to arrive.

Bending his knees, so he could look under the car, he smiled lovingly at Joey "It's time to come home, Joey – for you to be with me" turning his gaze to Pacey, immediately cold, filled with hatred "for you to go to hell, bro".

"Not today!" with those words, Dawson was knocked cold, the gun accidentally firing as he hit the ground.

A scream, an anguished cry for help was heard.

And a red, warm color tinting the snow on a beautiful winter's morning.


	30. Finale

** Chapter 30 - Finale**

Doug heard the anguish cry for help and Dawson's triumphal insane laughter. All his years of training did not prepare him for that. He knew his dad or himself could get shot, but not his little brother, and never under such circumstances. He called 911 over the radio, bringing memories of two kids playing in his dad's patrol car and he as the responsible and bored teenager watching them. Who would ever guess they were going to end up like this?

Joey stared at Pacey, his eyes closed, blood tinting her hands. This couldn't be happening, it was a nightmare, it had to be. Tears ran freely through her face, despair taking over her.

"Pacey, please, don't do this to me. You promised me forever, you never broke a promise before, so you better not start today." She said between sobs. "I need you, even if it is to annoy me, I always did." Joey paused to breathe. "Please, stay with me." She hid her face on his chest.

"I had to get shot for you to ask me that." Pacey said with a painful chuckle.

"Pacey?" Joey raised her head, to see his playful eyes. "You're not dying."

"Yeah, our friend has a lame aim."

"But I thought you were hurt, dying, you didn't move." She narrowed her eyes.

"I am hurt, my right arm, but I couldn't miss your love declarations," he winked.

"You...you jerk, bastard, insensitive prick..." She punched his chest furiously.

Pacey held her with his good arm, waiting for her to calm down.

"Hey, Potter, wounded guy in here." He yelled.

"Be happy if I don't hurt you even more." she retorted, trying to hide her relief.

"How are you, Pacey?" Doug asked, tranquilized by his brother's stare. "The ambulance will be here any moment now."

"It's just a scratch on my arm." He winced in pain. "Maybe it's not only a scratch." He mumbled as he saw the blood.

"Can you stand up, Pacey?" Doug was worried by his brother's paleness.

"Yeah, I think I can. Jo, could you help me?" With her help, although feeling dizzy, he was able to get on his feet.

"Pace, you look like you're going to pass out." Joey said worriedly.

"You wanted to kill me less than a minute ago." He teased.

"I was so worried." She hid her face on his shoulder. "You really scared me this time."

"I know, sweetheart. I know" He kissed her forehead. "I really need to sit down."

Bessie showed up in the porch, startled with the sounds they heard from inside, including a gunshot, to see her sister with tears in her eyes, helping out a bleeding Pacey and Doug looking lost.

"What happened here?" she yelled, confused.

"Dawson happened, he shot Pacey." Joey stated. "Help me here, Bess."

From the squad car, Dawson saw Pacey being helped by Joey and Bessie. Realization that trying to kill the sheriff's son wasn't the brightest idea he could have finally hit him. There was no escape for him now.

"I still can't believe this happened while I slept." Jen said, sipping her coffee at the hospital's cafeteria. "Jack, could you stop eating that muffin and say something, please?"

"What the hell happened to Dawson? Is that enough, Jenny?"

"I wonder what's taking them so long." Andie sighed, her eyes warming up when she saw Joey approaching them. "Joey, how is he?"

Joey sat on the table, tired, but smiling.

"The bullet didn't hit the bone, but went through the muscles; they had to check if there was no damage to any artery, but thanks God, no. Pacey's asleep now thanks to the pain killers."

"What's going to happen now?" Jack asked, plopping another muffin in his mouth.

"Pacey will need some rest..." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "And so will me."

"What about Dawson?" Jen asked.

"There's going to be a trial, but I already can see his lawyer pleading insanity." Joey shrugged. "It really doesn't matter; the only thing I want is him far, far away from us."

"He won't have much chance, Jo, Doug will testify against him, and I doubt Mr. and Mrs. Leery will help him on this."

"He's their son, Andie." She sighed. "I can't help but feel guilty."

"Are you out of your mind, Joey?" Jen asked her eyes wide opened. "Dawson is insane, and it has nothing about you."

"Losing me made him mad," she dropped her face.

"Joey, no, you can't believe that. Dawson got insane, because he never was able to handle reality; the world had to turn around him. It would have happened anyway, sweetie." Jen took her hand. "Take those bad feelings from you, and let's talk about something really important."

"And what's that, Jen?"

"What else could it be? The plans for your wedding."

A big smiled appeared on Joey's lips. That was a great thought. Her wedding. She absentmindedly caressed her ring. She barely could wait for the day she would become Mrs. Pacey Witter.

Pacey opened his eyes in the dim light of his hospital bedroom, a smile creeping on his lips when he saw Joey fast asleep on the chair beside his bed. She must have fallen asleep watching him. She must have sensed he was awake, because she stirred, slowly opening her eyes to fix them on him.

"Hey, you're awake," she whispered softly.

"What time is it?" He yawned. Those pills did a great job on him.

"It's night. They wanted to kick me out of here, but I said they would have to drug me first, so they let me stay."

Pacey laughed, nobody had a chance with a determined Joey Potter.

"Come here, Jo," he patted the bed. Joey sat beside him, her eyes shinning with love and relief. Pacey lifted his hand to touch her face, tracing her features. God, he was so happy to have her near him.

"Everybody has sent you best wishes. They said they were coming to visit you tomorrow, but according to the doctor, you'll probably be discharged in the morning."

"They can't have me here too long, huh?"

"Sorry, Pace, but I'm the only one who enjoys your company for longer than one day." Joey teased. "How do you feel?" she asked more serious now.

"Like someone who was shot," he joked. "These pain killers are great too."

"Pacey, this is serious," she complained.

"I know, Jo," he sighed. "It's really weird, you know, get shot by the guy you considered like a brother. And know that he really meant to kill you."

"Doug told me he was drunk… and his drugs screening came positive too." Joey whispered, resting her face on his shoulder.

"I never thought I would live to see Dawson Leery doing drugs." Pacey closed his eyes. "This was how I was supposed to end." He added somewhat bitter.

"You?" Joey lifted her face. "Pacey, you grew up to be a wonderful man, you don't hide from reality, and you lift your chin and fight against it. Dawson chose to do what he always did…runaway from reality. He just chose a very wrong manner to do it this time."

"I'll never forget how he looked at me, Jo, how he threatened us. You could have got hurt too." He closed his eyes, tired. "And although I'm still shocked, I'm also grateful that I didn't end up like that. That my life will be like I want it to be, not the way people thought it could be. And most of all. I'm grateful for having you here, in my life." He opened his eyes, to gaze into her brown ones.

"You're my world, Jo."

"I don't think I wanna be anyone's world, Pace. I had too much confusion and pain being other people's soul mate or world or everything. I'd like to be just Joey."

"Is there a place for a Pacey in this just Joey life?"

"There's nothing I want more." Joey rested her forehead against his. "To be just Joey and Pacey."

"You and me…always." Pacey whispered, before capturing her lips in a sweet kiss.

Dawson sat in his cell, never feeling so cold and lonely. Now that the booze had worn off, and he came back from high, the only thing he could think was what the fuck was he thinking? He knew he'd thrown his life away, and for no valid reason. He rested his face on his hands, tiredly.

"Dawson." He heard his father's voice from the bars.

"Dad!" He stood up to get closer, stopping in his tracks when he saw his dad's cold stare.

"I don't know you anymore." Mitch started. "You have no idea what's like to wake up with police knocking on you door to say that your son tried to kill his best friend while drunk and high."

"Pacey is not my best friend." Dawson said, trying to get some sympathy and receiving none.

"It doesn't matter anymore. You did this to yourself, Dawson, and don't even start blaming other people. It's all your doing. It's about time for you to pay for all your mistakes. I came here to tell you how embarrassed I am, how disgusted I am at you, and I'm not spending a single cent to help you. You're on your own, Dawson."

"But I'm your family. What about mom, and Lilly?"

"Lilly is a baby and your mom…you made your mom really unhappy. She agreed with me regarding you"

"You're abandoning me." Dawson accused.

"No, Dawson, we're not. We're still your parents; we're still your family. We're just trying to do what's right. And right now, son? You have to be on your own. I just hope you'll find your way back to us."

Mitch left, his heart broken, but refused to look back. Dawson crumbled to the floor, crying, defeated. Helpless. Nothing left to hold on.

Pacey led Joey through the police station, his good arm around her waist. He didn't want to do that, but she wanted a last conversation with Dawson, and he wasn't the one to deny her anything. He was scared of their reaction to the one who used to be their model of behavior, the one whose life they envied, now reduced to a common felon.

Joey held her breath at the sight before her. Dawson sat on the floor, stubble growing on his face, giving him a dirty aspect. He used to be so neat to the point of freakiness and now…nothing seemed to care.

"Dawson," she called in a low voice. He turned his face, an indefinite emotion passing in his eyes as he stared at the couple through the bars. He dropped his face again.

"What do you want?" Dawson asked, bitterly. "Rub it in a little?"

"Chill out, man. We came here to talk, just that," Pacey answered.

"I don't wanna your pity or anything else you came to tell me."

"You don't have a choice, Dawson," Joey stated firmly. "We're talking and you will have to listen, even if you don't want to."

"I have the right to be left in peace. Isn't it enough that my own father doesn't want anything to do with me?"

"You asked for that, Dawson. All you're doing now is paying for your actions, your bad choices in life. And whether or not you want to hear this, we came here to forgive you, not because of the man you've become, but because the childhood friend you were."

"That's all I am now, huh, Joey?"

"Sorry, Dawson, but that's all you'll ever be," Pacey replied. "You chose that when you pulled the trigger. If it were only for me, but you could've hurt Jo. That I'll never be able to forgive you. Or forget for that matters."

"So, you're here to tell me you intend to erase me form your life?"

"We will never erase you, Dawson; you held our most cherished childhood memories. You are our past, and we can't erase what made us what we are today. We're here to ask you to get better, to move on with your life when you're out of this mess you put yourself in." Joey stopped to breath, clutching Pacey's hand even stronger. "We're here to get closure. To tell you once and for all that you don't have a place in our future."

"You had your closure, now if you excuse me, I want to be alone," Dawson retorted.

"Good-bye, Dawson," Joey and Pacey said, leaving without looking back.

"Good-bye." Dawson whispered alone in his cell as he watched his once best friends leave.

Pacey and Joey stepped out the police station, the sunlight reflecting in the snow and the cool breeze welcoming them. They walked in silence, feeling like they just buried a friend. What they did, figuratively. They turned on Molly Market, stopping at their wall. Echoes from the past whispering in their minds.

Joey sighed, shaking her head slightly. The past had to be left behind. Pacey circled her waist from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder.

"You ok, Jo?" He whispered, kissing her temple.

Joey turned her face to look into his eyes; a sad smile crept on her lips.

"I'm ok, Pace. I'm just saying good-bye in my heart. And wondering…if we had told him right after our kiss on the road, if I had more strength back then and told him right away, if things would be different. But deep inside, I know they wouldn't."

"I know how it feels, Jo. I wish they were different, but I can't change the past, nor can you. And don't feel guilty, sweetheart. Dawson is sick, like Andie once was, all he needs is treatment."

"You forgave him, didn't you?"

"The only thing I can't forgive him is that you suffered and are still suffering from his acts."

"Still my white knight, huh?"

"Although you're not exactly a damsel, someone has to do this job."

"Jerk," She whispered her lips close to his.

"Icequeen." Pacey replied, brushing his lips against hers.

They broke the kiss, looking once more at the wall, where the words painted as a work of desperate love looked back at them. Ask me to stay.

"You know one thing I'll never regret, Pace? Not asking you to stay."

"Why not?" he knitted his brows waiting for her answer.

"If I did, we wouldn't have that perfect summer."

"It would still be perfect. It would be you and me." He kissed her forehead. "And you know what, Jo? That was just a first of many, sweetie."

"Is that your way to tell me to stop dwelling on the past?" she chuckled.

"Why care about the past, when we have the whole future ahead?" He tightened his arms around her. "When we already know what the future brings us?"

"What does it bring, oh wise one?"

"More…you and me…always." He muttered between kisses. "Let's go, baby, let's go home."

"And where is home, Pace?" Joey asked, linking her arm with his.

"Wherever we are. Together." He answered, as they walked in the cold winter morning towards their future. Together.

**The End**


	31. Epilogue

**Epilogue - What the future brought**

Pacey closed the door, throwing his keys over the coffee table, loosening his tie. It had been an exhausting day; all he wanted was a peaceful night. Something smelled good in the kitchen; he went there and peeked in the oven. Lasagna. Joey Potter had indeed improved her culinary skills over the years. She certainly wouldn't mind if he took just a bite from it.

"Pacey Witter, don't you dare." A grinning Joey yelled from the doorway.

"I was just verifying if it's eatable." He approached her, leaning in for a kiss. "How was your day, sweetie?"

"I finished my book," she answered frowning.

"What's the frown for?" Pacey asked his wife, following her to the small room converted into an office for them.

"Read it." She pointed to her still open laptop. "There's something missing."

Pacey sat on the armchair with Joey on his lap while he read the last words she typed. She had been working on this new book for almost six months now, and was always changing the twists and turns; nothing seemed to make her content with it.

"I don't know where the problem is, Jo. I think it's really beautiful, sweetheart."

"I'm not sure if it's credible that after five years apart they would get together that easily."

"You call that easily? You have to reconsider your definitions, baby." He kissed her forehead.

"Pace, this is serious, I don't wanna be considered a fluke," she pouted.

"Jo, you can't be considered a fluke on your third book." Pacey tightened his arms around her. "Why don't you go, take a shower, and relax a little? I can finish dinner."

"I have a better idea, why don't you come with me?" she cocked an eyebrow suggestively.

"Dinner will be cold." Pacey nuzzled her neck, kissing the sensitive spot below her ear.

"It won't be a first time." Joey held his face between her hands, kissing him soundly. "Let's go, Mr. Witter." She got up from his lap offering her hand.

"I'm right behind you, Mrs. Witter."

Joey leaned against Pacey's chest, bubbles covering them, a sweet scent coming from the bathtub. She sighed, enjoying the comfort while Pacey's hands rubbed her shoulders. He would drop a kiss here and there occasionally as they talked about their day.

"Hmmm...This is good, Pace," Joey muttered when his hands descended to her back.

"It can get even better," he whispered, lowering his hands a little bit more, grinning with her moan of pleasure. Joey turned her head so she could kiss him until they were both breathless.

A ringing phone startled them. Joey broke off the kiss, leaving the tub, hastily covering up herself with her towel to get it.

"If that is Jen Lindley calling, I'm gonna kill her with bare hands," Pacey mumbled. One thing that hadn't changed through the years: their friends' bad timing. Not having another choice, he also left the bathroom, wrapping a towel around his waist. Joey was animatedly chatting on the phone. Definitely Jen. When she noticed he was around, she quickly changed whatever was the subject.

"What's wrong with Jen this time?" he circled her waist, nuzzling her neck.

"Something about napkins that don't match the flowers. You know how she's been nervous about the wedding. Our soon-to-be Mrs. Drue Valentine is absolutely freaking out," Joey winked, her mind wandering.

How that happened, neither of them could tell. One day, Jen called from Capeside, where she had gone after graduation to work as a teacher at good ole Capeside High, saying that she and Drue were an item, and soon they were engaged. He was still the same ass, softened by the years, but he made Jen happy and was crazy about her. What else could a girl want?

Jack. Jack was currently living in San Francisco, quite smitten with a Hugh Jackman -like boyfriend and working as a TV reporter at a local station. His good looks and easy manner made his job easier, and many fans were disappointed to learn he was actually gay. Although he missed Jen fiercely, he had a life he could finally be proud of.

His sister, Andie never came back to US, except for occasional visits. Italy suited her, she worked as a PR, as she had predicted, for a famous Italian singer, who also happened to be her husband. Nice way to mix pleasure and business.

"Jo? You zoned out for a moment there, sweetheart," Pacey called, bringing her back of her reverie.

"Jen told me everyone is coming to the wedding and I realized how much I miss Jack and Andie," she sighed.

"Feeling lonely in the big city, kitten?" he teased, nibbling her earlobe.

They'd moved to New York five years before, fresh from graduation, Pacey had been admitted to Columbia for Law School and Joey started her meteoric writing career. Her books were loved by critics and public, and sold well. Pacey, on the other hand, was working his way into the DA office. Who would ever guess that, huh? Pacey Witter, juvenile delinquent extraordinaire, was now battling on the right side of the law.

"Never, I've got you," she smiled, her tongue peeking behind her teeth, her arms around his neck. "Where were we when Jen interrupted us?"

"Right here," he whispered against her skin, letting her towel slip to the floor.

Again, the telephone rang, interrupting the couple once more.

"Leave it, Pace," Joey whispered seductively. "Let the machine get it."

"Yep," he mumbled against her lips, slowly walking backwards to fall on the couch.

"Pacey? Joey? It's Doug, I've got something important to tell you guys, call me as soon as possible," they heard Doug's voice on the machine. They both started laughing.

"I think we should give up for now, sweetheart. Go call your brother and I'll finish dinner."

"I can't talk to Doug like this," Pacey pressed her against him to make his point.

"Think about your father walking in on us wearing your grandma's panties, that might help," Joey teased, getting off him, going to get dressed.

"On that thought, I think it won't be possible for me to come up with any seduction plans for the next month," he followed her to their room.

"Are you sure, Pace?" Joey asked, running a finger over his chest.

"To hell Dougie and his phone call," Pacey exclaimed, lifting her in his arms, carefully putting her on their bed, his lips on hers. "This is more important than anything else."

"Pacey? Are you still talking to Doug?" Joey called from the kitchen. When he didn't reply, she went to the living room, where her husband was seriously talking to his brother over the phone. He made a sign for her to wait as he finished the phone call.

Pacey hung up tired. He had some bad news and he was worried about how Joey would react to those. It had been a long time since they last heard from Dawson, but no time was enough whenever she remembered that day he'd tried to kill him.

"Pacey? What's wrong? Any problem with your parents?"

"No, Jo, they're ok," he sighed, putting his arms around her waist. "Doug called me to warn us that an old friend is back to Capeside."

"Dawson?" Joey shivered slightly. They knew he'd been out for a while now, but having him back in the Cape wasn't a reality she was prepared for. Not now.

"Yep," he kissed her forehead, holding her closer. "Doug said he hasn't done anything wrong, and apparently is clean, but Dougie thinks it's better for us to get a restraining order."

"Or we could just stay here," Joey sighed.

"And miss Jen's wedding? No way, we're not the wrong side here, sweetheart. And Dawson would be really dumb to try anything; I could get him back behind bars before he blinked an eye."

"All right, Mr. DA," Joey chuckled. "No need to get all worked up."

"I don't wanna you getting all worried, Jo."

"You know, I'm not letting Dawson Leery get on my nerves. I've got more important things to care about."

"Like?" Pacey kissed his way down her neck.

"Our dinner," she smiled. "That's going to need another reheat if you don't stop doing this."

"I'm doing nothing," his voice in an innocent tone, while his hands had found heir way under her shirt.

"God, Pacey, you're insatiable."

"Only when it comes to you," he whispered.

"I can live with that…but right now, we're going to eat," she caught one of his hands, dragging him to the kitchen.

Dawson wandered on the streets of Capeside, enjoying the summer breeze. He had gone to hell and back and a simple day became a precious thing to enjoy. Freedom, people didn't know how vital that was unless it was taken from them. It was his fault; he had fully accepted that, he couldn't blame others for his inability to deal with growing up and letting go.

He knew they'd be here this weekend, Capeside still was a small town, and the talk of day was the upcoming nuptials of Jen Lindley to Drue Valentine; the city expected the Witter couple to be there, after all, Joey'd become a famous writer, her name was now whispered with pride, the town conveniently forgetting how they'd treated her during her teenage years.

Jen bumped into the grumpy figure, taking more than a minute to realize who he was. She wanted to go away, it was awkward to meet him after so long. Dawson looked older than his years, life hadn't been easy to him, she knew it, but he also seemed peaceful, as she never had seen him before.

"I'm sorry, Dawson," she mumbled and started to walk away.

"Jen," he called and walked after her. Worried, Jen stopped, it was clear day, he wouldn't do anything against her. "Don't worry, I don't have any evil plan."

Jen tried to reason. "Dawson, I'm sorry, but I have errands to run."

"I don't wanna cause any problems, rest assured. I just want to know one thing: is she happy?"

"Yes, Dawson, she is," Jen told him, feeling sorry for her former friend. "They both are."

"Thanks, Jen. That's all I needed to know. If I ask you something would you do it?"

"What is it?"

"I'd like you to give this to them," he told her, handing over a worn out envelope. 

"I'll do it, don't worry."

"Thanks, Jen, it means a lot to me," he said, walking away from her.

"Take care, Dawson," Jen whispered, turning the envelope in her hands. What did Dawson write in there?

Joey sat on her bed at the B&B, almost scared to open the envelope. Jen had given it to her this morning, and she was waiting for Pacey to come to bed to read it with him. It was disturbing to get anything from Dawson after so much time, and she couldn't shake the memories off. Good and bad ones.

Pacey entered the room, watching his wife's worried face as she played with that damned envelope. If it were for him, he'd burn it without second thoughts, but Joey wanted to read it, to see if it was possible to finally close that door in their past. In his heart, he already closed it, the day Dawson shot him, but he knew Joey still needed closure with the past.

"I could turn Drue into a widower before the ceremony after Jen gave you this," he said in a mock tone, sitting beside her.

"Pacey, please, Dawson already left town, as Doug told you, what harm can a letter do? Jen said he looked different."

"I'm not arguing about that, Jo, you know it, and for Dawson being changed, we fell for that more than a hundred times," he laid back on bed, bringing her to his arms. "What's bothering me is that you're worried and it's not good for you. Neither of you." He touched her still flat stomach, the secret they still kept from all their friends and family.

Joey smiled warmly, covering his hand with hers. They had been trying to have a baby for the past three years; they were almost losing faith it would happen naturally, when she went to a routine check up and almost choked when her doctor told her she was pregnant. And Pacey's expression when she told him was priceless.

_Joey arrived home still speechless. If she hadn't seen it on the ultrasound scan, she wouldn't believe it either. She was about to ask about infertility treatments, and now there was no need for that. She sighed, wondering how she would tell Pacey.___

_"Hey, Jo, already home?" He asked, coming from the kitchen. "I thought you had a meeting with your editor today."___

_"I cancelled it," she explained, giving him a peck on his lips. "I wanted to come home early and stay with you."___

_"Is everything all right?" he asked, circling her waist. ___

_"Yes, I'm just thinking about my doc's visit today," she replied unsure of how to tell him they were going to have a baby.___

_"Jo, sweetheart," he said worriedly, putting a finger under her chin to gaze into her eyes. "Don't tell me you're sick or something."___

_"Definitely not sick, Pace. But there's something about it we should discuss."___

_"You're scaring me here, sweetie."___

_"I asked her about our problem, you know, with conceiving and she told me she can't help us with that."___

_"We can't have babies, is that it?" he interrupted, frustration evident on his features.___

_"Nope, she can't help us with that because we already did it," she told him softly, waiting for his reaction.___

_Pacey stared at her in shock, and then realization started to kick in. "You are…I mean...we are…" he mumbled, unable to form a coherent sentence.___

_Joey nodded, grabbing his hands and putting over her stomach. "Yes, sweetheart, we're going to have a baby."___

_He cupped her face with his hands, his thumbs brushing her cheeks softly. "You've made me the happiest man alive."___

_"It's a tough job, but someone's gotta do it," she joked, brushing her lips against his. "I love you, Pacey."___

_"We're going to have a baby," he said again, in awe, hugging her tightly and then dropping to his knees to kiss her navel. "Hello, baby."___

_"You're such a sap, Pace," Joey laughed, running her fingers through his hair as he kept placing kisses all over her stomach.___

_"A sap who loves you more than life itself," he replied, taking her lips with his. "And you too," he said, touching again her abdomen._

"Jo? Are you ready for this?" he asked, pointing the letter.

She simply nodded, and Pacey's arms circled her shoulders, bringing her as close as possible, as they both read Dawson's letter.

_Joey and Pacey,___

_I know I can't send this letter, because I can't have your address, but there are things I have to say. I've made so many mistakes that it's hard to point the first one. But I know what was the most important one: I acted like a self absorbed ass most of time, if I had acknowledged that, I would never treat you, Joey, like a possession or you, Pacey, as a sidekick, usually kicked when you were at your worst. You were my friends, the best friends a person could ask for and I underestimated that. There are no excuses for my behavior, and I will not ask for forgiveness or show you I've been through redemption, we all know these only work in movies. Believe me, I know that. The only thing I ask is for you to remember me not as the crazy demented who shot Pacey, but as that boy who lived by the creek and dreamed about movies. I wish I had recognized what love story was real and true since the beginning. Who knows where we'd be now? I just hope you two will make justice to the true love story and have the happy ever after ending. I'll try to find my own story again, who knows, I might be able to dream again.___

_Good-bye,___

_Dawson._

Joey gave a sad chuckle as Pacey wiped a tear that slipped from her eyes. 

"He always has to try to script everything, doesn't he?"

"Yeah, but you know one thing, Potter?" he kissed her forehead. "He's wrong about the happy ending."

"We got the happy ending," she said, snuggling closer.

"No, Josephine, we got the happy beginning of forever," Pacey replied, his lips descending on hers.

"Forever," Joey repeated, peace taking over her. She used to worry so much about the future, but she knew now that no matter what the future brought, she would overcome, with Pacey and their family by her side.

**The end****  
****Now I can really say good-bye to them.**


End file.
